Tiktok can remove my comment but they can't remove Israel's blood soaked cock from their mouths.

20 likes and I'll fart really loudly in this zoom meeting at work

Men (and cool women) yearn for the nipple

We should put more billionaires in more subs, just streamline the process at this point

"Being nice is free!" Yeah, so is being a hater

Gooch scooch

You ever walk past people talking and accidentally gain NPC lore?

Damn, he really Doug Dimmadied

Nobody: Tiktok shop pages for some reason: oh my god, I'm sitting here watching Grey's Anatomy and farting blood, if only Goli made a gummy for my super diarrhea

Michael Dell and the sex doll that he brought to life using the Faustian bargain with Donald Trump want to give your kid AIDS. No wait, that's not right. It says here money, but it's clearly AIDS

"Go big, or go home." Me leaving work early: say no more

What did she mean by this

Welcome to Oklahoma, where the median IQ is half of the current temperature

Me walking into a movie theater sneaking in two of those huge bags of popcorn to save money

MFW I put something on the top rack with the forklift at work and pray I got it on there and it won't, for some reason, come undone and crush me to death

My genie: was it worth it? Me, holding three brand new vintage Charlotte Hornets 90s starter jackets: hell yeah

You've been excited before, but have you been "new pillow" excited?

I don't want to go to the in laws, I wanna get high and play Cloverpit

Thats crazy that this is a real picture and is no way AI

Till the series finale

AI really went from "haha look at low poly Will Smith eating noodles" to "my stripper job was taken by Grok and its doing a way better job than I ever could"

I should not be able to scroll tiktok doing 70 on the freeway and be a more attentive driver than half these schmucks. If you drive under the speed limit you have a mental illness and should be removed from the road

Please go support this woman. The KGB already broke her legs and are forcing her to draw pictures of cute anime women.

Hi, I'm a 40 year old man who giggles and kicks his feet at making AI videos to share in the discord group chat. Please be my friend

Had some free time this morning, so I googled "chill places to hang out around me". Mostly everything is still closed, except a coffee shop. The one I'm currently sitting in

Me being led into the break room for the "pizza party" (they're gonna shoot me in the back of the head)

Accidentally let it linger

Imagine getting the role of a lifetime, and you spend half the movie with Bowie's fat cock in your face

If the full epstein files get released, I'll post the OF link

Thats crazy they made Balatro into a real card game

I'm too much of a self absorbed asshole to be a cuck

Fuck, I'm old

If I had a nickle for every Presidental blowjob scandal, I'd have two nickles, which isn't a lot but it's weird it happened twice

I always knew Trump was a cocksucker

Does Gavin Newsom know about this

I'm suing Monster energy drink. It hasn't made me gay or a superhero like the commercial in my dream said it would

About to take my pennies to the strip club for one final hurrah

Took my very first dick pic today. Dude didnt even seem to mind

We aren't telling people to shut their bitch ass up enough

Best feelings in the world: - being loved (wouldn't know) - taking a big poop - sex (I'm told) - internet coming back after 4 days

Google essentially canceled my internet without telling me, left ZERO notes or explanation, did not allow me to reactivate it, been without net since Tuesday and now I have to wait a few more days till my new router comes. Google, I swear to God if I see you on the sidewalk, I'm swerving.

Day 2 without internet: I have forgotten what boobs look like

Without internet for maybe a few days and holy shit, what did I do before the internet? Gotta jerk off to Sears catalogs like a fucking caveman

Dick Cheney greeting people at the pearly gates (2025, colored)

It's November 2nd. Stop with the fucking Christmas shit already

(TINY RANT) This little sycophantic, vitamin D deficient, masturbatory sock puppet is Steven Miller. This insipid smiling crotch goblin is utterly one of the worst human beings walking this planet, and the reason why your friends of color are afraid to walk the streets. He's currently living on(1/3)

America slowly dying at the hands of the Trump Administration: Sydney Sweeney's tits out of nowhere for some reason: