also why do i have to do actual lessons at a school i don't even go to bruh ????

hello i have zero social battery rn but i still have to go socialise at this school i don't even want to go to kill me

"yeah i can tell you're crashing out actually, because i don't understand what you're saying" - my history teacher (directed at me) 😓

why did my form tutor just like one of my insta comments on her priv acc 😭😭😭

i've not seen a single horse since the day before my bday bro i am acc going insane

i know i shouldn't but i'm honestly considering not doing it cos of this but complaining to my form tutor abt how much i'm struggling (cos shes already seen me have a panic attack and might get it) so i have sm1 to confirm that i'm not js lying abt stuff and i don't have to do any hw 💀

bro i hate hw cld i js tell everyone that i'm too depressed to do work and get out of it???? /j

also i am crashing out again bcs i hat yet another panic attack at sch today bruh why do i keep doing this to myself

guys ik this is serving attention seeking like mad but i acc wanna have a bad fall off a horse again js so i can have smth acc visibly wrong w me unlike whatevers going on rn 😓

I miss the days when Obama could just post his summer playlist instead of dire warnings.

also when we were going back towards the classroom and i started crashing out again jstodd was fr so good at grounding me again by asking questions abt who was in my cs class and stuff bless her i love her sm 😭😭

guys i don't even remember half of what happened cos i wasn't exactly thinking properly during it but i do remember telling jstodd that i was scared my cs teacher wld get angry at me and when jstodd said she wouldn't i was like idk 😭 then she was like "what is she scary?" and i fr said "sometimes" 😭

lets air how muggy this is but here was my situation on the way to school today 😓

guys i love her 😭😭😭

2 panic attacks in 1 day bro this is ridiculous 😭😭

hello why am i already this stressed when its only september what is happening

exactly 2 hours left until i'm old (3:16pm) 💔💔💔

hello here is clyde testing my seat yesterday. also its my bday today if anyone gaf 😝

hello i have js been informed that sm1 in my year brushes her teeth for 45 mins to an hour EVERY NIGHT

just got my first christmas spotify advert.

i thought i was over my fear of fire but nah i js has a panic attack cos my mum turned the fire on (its a gas fire thats why i said turn on) lmaoooo

me when i listen to the michael jackson song of agony and dispair

every time i have a reason to think abt my bday i get reminded of my coursework thats due 3 days after!! and how i've barely done any of it!! hahahaha i wanna cry I NEED TO GET IT DONE BUT I CANT

why do i flinch every time i open a can LMAOOO

lol and this is how much i was shaking even 20 mins later 💀

hey so i was tracking my ride on clyde w my watch but he bolted AND LOOK HOW HIGH MY HEART RATE GOT 😭😭😭

first breach song to learn (other than the contract and drum show): center mass

i know nobody here really gafs abt twenty one pilots but the transition between one way and days lie dormant w josh??? hello??????

how my mum feels after criticising how i look in my sch photos and mocking me for my face in one of them (they took it before i was properly smiling 😓) forgetting that if i did the same thing to her she'd be SO angry ugh i hate this

look at how high my heart rate went today I WASNT EVEN THAT ANXIOUS TODAY 😓 also abt the 46, that was when i was asleep idk why its so low 😭

wearing a fitbit is so cool but like how does it know my heart rate is 116? how does it know my blood oxygen is 97%? ITS SO COOL

lol earlier me and chloe were talking to my form tutor abt cats and i was fr like "yeah mines gonna die soon!" like there was no need to say it like that but ok 😓

fly high nugget, i'm gonna miss you sm ☹️💗🕊️

i currently feel like the meme w the guy (me) thats w this one girl (my eng hw & german vocab) but is looking at another girl (anything else) 😓

i still haven't done this for this exact reason bruh i js don't get it HOW DO PPL WRITE DIARY ENTRIES SO EASILY

why have my teachers always called me 'gentle' bruh what does that even mean .

i'm trying so hard to lock in w this but i js don't know what to write HOW DO I KNOW WHAT HES THINKING WHEN IT DOESNT EXPLICITLY SAY IT?????

i hate english guys i don't understand anything

guys i don't get it 😭😭 HOW do you write a diary entry from someone elses perspective w/o knowing what they acc think like wdym i'm js meant to make up how he feels??? wtf bro he could be feeling anything i don't understand

guys i'm acc gonna crash out. this is the eng hw my class got, the only other class that got hw got a QUIZ. ts isn't fair 😓

MY EARS

riding after not eating anything all day<<<

gotta get through english to get to double history UGHHH I HATE ENGLISH

i'm so cold.

broskis i wanna relapse so bad. i'm acc going insane

hamilton artists i understand. but mj?? i only listen to mj when i need to lock in cos hamiltons too distracting 😓

rundown of sch today: -got used as an example for an object in the road in physics (stopping distance) -wrote the wrong yr group on my bio test -crashed out in history. like full on shaking (i'm ok now and at the end of the lesson jstodd asked if i was okay ☹️) -did my german hw out of BOREDOM.

womble mentioned 😝

oh also one of the pe teachers added me to the old 2021 yr7 games teams??? like diva its not 2021 and i'm not in yr7 😭😭😭

i present to you all my current situation 😓 it doesn't help that my history teacher is already concerned abt my mental health and will 100% think i actually want to kms (i don't??? question mark) 😭😭😭😭