Damn dawg JD would have to take on a new job while his wife is pregnant and while he's trying his best to do the same to Erika Kirk

"turn the plane around i left evidence in my gold-plated race car bed"

C'MON I WANT IT SO BADLY

I need a voodoo doll that's just an airplane

aviation expert here: donald trump merely shit on his balls

what if he just shit his pants again and they're saying electrical issue

"minor electrical issue aboard air force one" great now he's going after inanimate objects under 18 years old too

🤞

I have this condition where I cannot impregnate a woman called "being a hermit and a loser"

calling an elderly raccoon Trash Panda Coot

This was our Border Collie named Missy. We thought she was a mutt. Turned out that she was a kinda rare tan and white Collie instead of black/brown and white. This pic is from her penultimate day on Earth when she had that one last burst of energy before the inevitable rainbow bridge. I loved her.

When I was in high school I came home to an empty house a lot, parents were busy and my three sisters off doing adult real life stuff in multiple countries. That's a bit of whiplash going from busy household to 17 and by myself, having my two cats and two dogs was so good for me.

I love dogs, man. Like no preference in size or breed. I've loved Chihuahuas named Clyde and Piglet, I've loved Border Collies and GSP's named Missy and Raddy, I've loved Rottweilers named Jakey and Lucky and a Great Pyrenees named Nemo and many Pits and Dachshunds and little cryptid gremlin mutts.

CHILDHOOD FRIEND ADOPTED A SHIH TZU AND SHE BOUGHT HIM A UGA JERSEY HELL YES She was two grades below me but my sister and her brother were good friends so she watched our Shih Tzu Dewey once or twice and I'm gonna lie to myself about that being the reason she and her husband got a Shih Tzu

The first friend I made in Savannah when I moved here is just cream of the crop good people and she knows everything about my life and recent struggles and texts me with "hey champ!" I love her so much

God this must be a 15-year-old tweet at this point but one of my favorites was: "I'm socially liberal and fiscally conservative. The problems are very bad, but their causes? Their causes are very good."

“ICE isn’t the Gestapo. The Gestapo was…” (proceeds to describe qualities that apply to what ICE is currently doing)

Invite my handsome depressed ass to your wedding, I can be your something blue.

I watch a lot of videos of people building shelters for snow camping, found a guy named Ben Beauchamp who looks like he's my slightly older or slightly younger brother. Mustache, same shape eyes, same hair, similar eye color, similar nose, similar cheek bones, same jaw. It's odd.

Nanni saying "you can spell 'purge' without The U" holy shit

fullcast at full blast right now, goddamn they are cooking

Mendoza to Bowers let me have this

absolutely remarkable

Like what the fuck did we just witness from 2023 Indiana to 2025 Indiana

This is absolutely amazing as a general sports fan. Holy shit dude, good for Indiana.

CIG SMOKE A MARLBORO AND GET DRUNK

Jesus fuckin' Christ, the undefeated national FOOTBALL champions Indiana Hoosiers.

I'll take a second to try and be serious about meaningless sports banter: When it comes to the chess match that exists behind any sport, this is the most impressive turnaround in American sports history.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

That is not roughing the passer sorry

Kicking to go up six hurts me

what a grab fuuuuuuck not even the best mendoza can throw

football is fun send skeet

Mendoza, Bulldozer, same thing

Won the Heisy for a fuckin' reason

DUDE WHAT THE FUCK

Me to the mirror each morning

what a fucking catch hot damn

I need more natties decided by tight ends with "fuck you, pay me" attidude My only suggestion

Fletcher fuckin' rules

I'll eat my words but I'm calling a zone read pick

I need to sample Herbstreit saying "secret sauce" into a house club beat

college football is so fucking stupid and so are we and i love all of us

DOINK IN

BLOCK TD FUCK

Carson Beck do you have a thing about making the most dangerous throws and just hoping

I'm so into offensive coordinator mode with a team I don't even give a shit about I will never see god's light

advil aka AdVille is a slur for the fifth floor of UGA's journalism school where the advertising students read all night and have will-they-won't-they syndrome

fuck i love you insane college football goons lmao