Homie is sleeping at my apartment, high school sleepover reunion I would not let many people sleep over but I would die for this dude

Dagger

Well fuck me sideways

Tillman is so good at that shit

GOAL BITCH

LET'S FUCKING GO ONE OF MY BEST CHILDHOOD FRIENDS WHO LIVED OUTSIDE THE COUNTRY FOR A FEW YEARS IS COMING TO WATCH THE WORLD CUP WITH ME

Bro I have everything I need at an arm's length, I live less than a mile from work, two of my coworkers and one former coworker (good dudes) live in this apartment, my best friend from college just moved back here from Chicago and he lives a mile away, I live laugh love alone, this shit fucking rips

Y'ALL I WAS NOT PAYING ATTENTION Behind the auto shop across from my apartment exists a Waffle House. I live a two minute walk from a Waffle House.

I'm going to this watch party where I know one annoying (American!) guy will be there who loves soccer but actively roots against us because Trump virtue signaling and I might just get in a fight wish me luck

Let's fucking get this win. I'm so nervous.

ANYBODY WANNA REMEMBER SOME GUYS?

I finally removed my thousands of baseball/basketball/football cards from my parents' house. So fun looking through these. Found a rookie Ginobili in the plastic protector!

I know it's not much but sometimes I go outside just to look at my car. I say I didn't have a car for over a year and a half, but the last four years it ran was constant issues so almost six years of constant transportation issues. Also, more railways please.

"I'd rather my team lose fairly than win unfairly" yeah I used to say obscene, awful things to opponents and give them an elbow when the refs weren't looking

Again, so nice to be able to drag ass setting up the apartment with nobody complaining "when are you gonna...?" THIS IS MY DOMAIN. I ANSWER TO NO MORTAL ASIDE FROM THOSE WHO EMPLOY ME.

I've gotten so boring, I love it!

Y'all I did not expect Publix to even have shower curtain hooks but there was one package remaining, second trip saved, the universe smiles upon me recently

found so many banger albums from the end of high school at my parents' house throwing this one in the Ford Exploder for my lil errands

Dammit dude I bought a real adult shower curtain and forgot to buy the hooks BUT GUESS WHO HAS A CAR NOW BABY

The (slight) nerve damage in my right foot is acting up for the first time in a while but I love that it's happening when I'm not at work

Buddy's dad who built the pool also built a big covered area next to it. Apparently he milled the wood from their back yard himself and built the entire thing alone. It looks professional. Have fun at the match in Seattle tonight Mr. Mark, you are a force.

I want this to sound not weird: So my buddy I visited the other day is the oldest, he's got three little brothers and a little sister, youngest now 23. They've all grown up to be so handsome and they all brought their girlfriends to the pool and the girlfriends are really pretty and it was wild.

the plural of manhole is menhole

My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low-grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. -Dr. Evil BEAT BELGIUM

Forgot this happened during yesterday's brief torrential downpour, I left it on purpose lol

Ya know what, this ain't bad for a single idiot who lives alone: I have two plastic cups that match, six actual glasses that match, four big plates and six small plates that match, four forks and four spoons and four knives that match, four bowls that match. I'M AN ADUUUUUUUUULT

I'm so lucky a lot of my oldest friends, after we all went off and lived in different states, have gradually migrated back to Atlanta. I have a social life! I know I was only in Savannah for nine months but yeah I only made like three friends.

So there used to be exactly one Taco Cabana location outside Texas and it was in Atlanta, we'd eat there a good bit. Shut down in 2014 to build an apartment complex on the land. I now live less than a mile from it and it makes me sad.

My apartment complex is super aggressive booting cars if you don't have a parking pass and it always is a bummer to see all the booted cars. Plus we have way more parking spaces than cars!

Sixpence None The Richer has to be the most annoying band name ever, right?

My mom gave me extra sheets/comforter but prefaced it with "I know they're girly, but..." Mom you are doing me a favor also I'm very queer and just got an apartment and a car so I'm also very poor, hell yeah I want it.

I'm writing a silly song for my family about the first time meeting my nephew Good thing his nickname is Choo Choo so I can rhyme "nephew" and "Choo Choo" and, since he shat his diaper in my lap, "Poo Poo."

Dangit the power went out mid-movie

Our college intramural soccer team was fun as fuck because I (mostly) played right back/center back in high school It was just a bunch of our friends so they told me I could play forward if I wanted to I scored a lot of goals it was dope

Speaking of Dutch people being tall, one of my soccer friends from high school is a very tall woman with with parents from Amsterdam and we started that co-ed intramural soccer team at UGA and bro she scored so many headers Unexpectedly as the tallest person there I always sucked at headers

Also the beginning and end of that train ride from Venice to Amsterdam was hilarious because in Italy I was obviously American but I'm 6'6" and white as fuck so when I got to Rotterdam people were asking me for directions at the train station

Watching the shitty remake of The Italian Job but every time I see Venice in a movie I'm like "hey I walked there wearing a sick outfit when I was 23."

Today I called somebody "feckless" and it felt so goddamn good

I am also so hashtag blessed that the best friend I made in Savannah and I are still keeping up. Also she road trips for fun a lot and she loves Atlanta and the record stores and restaurants I recommended last year!

i won't talk shit about mexico until we beat belgium i won't talk shit about mexico until we beat belgium i won't talk shit about mexico until we beat belgium

I have tomorrow to do fuck all and I might just record and extremely shitty lo-fi song and actually show people

By the way guys I want to make this clear since I've been open about struggles with booze: I didn't have a car for a long time, but not because of a DUI or anything. My last car was 23 years old, engine failure, and I just got by without a car for almost two years. The question has been asked.

I still can't get over how good yesterday was for my soul.

Also shouts out to my favorite coworker Juan because he knows a ton about soccer while admitting he was trash as a player Me too, man, me too

re: last post most boomer thing about me is that i cannot respect a limp handshake, much like Hank Hill

lol so my neighbor carlos is a huge soccer fan i was just texting my friend i used to play with (i told homie i like my neighbor because we talk soccer) "caros is awfully quiet" as soon as i hit send i heard clapping, i'm never speaking such things into existence again

What the fuck is this England Mexico match

So there's this gas station (Sunoco) called Minit Saver right next to where I went to high school. Your classic "random gas station in the south that serves insanely good breakfast biscuits" thing. I stopped for caffeine but I was dragging ass this morning and did not have time to place an order 😢

lmao haaland has scored in fourteen consecutive caps for norway in those fourteen matches he has 23 goals jesus dude what the fuck

holy shit i have to go watch what haaland did