MIL READING TRIVIA MIL: What weapon is not allowed in Olympic fencing? Me: Fences. MIL: ??? Me: They’re de-fence-less!!!

Today in “One-liners That Absolutely Destroyed Me”: “Someone should invent a currency that’s just the amount that it is.” - @alexsammon.bsky.social

Yes I understand the economy is in shambles, there are protests in the streets, and the U.S. has more travel warnings than we can recall in memory, but I’m not going to stop air humping while grocery shopping when I hear a real banger on the radio. It ain’t that bad yet.

Imagine electing a president with the personality of “posts Minion memes on Facebook”.

“Now you have me!” - Lady on Love Is Blind entertaining the exact same alien glowing tablet conspiracy theory that is eventually going to lead to their divorce whenever she can’t stand listening to his shit anymore.

Don’t Look Up wasn’t entertainment; it was a warning. And now we’re living it.

You know how we all have that one coworker we call the village idiot because no one knows how they got the job in the first place and we secretly make fun of them for the stupid shit they say in meetings? I wonder who that person will be at the September UNGA meeting.

Not blaming Flobots, but thinking Musk misunderstood the meaning of No Handlebars.

I quit Amazon at the beginning of the year. I’ve saved about 10% on the things I order every month. Shopify allows millions of smaller companies to compete with Amazon without monopolizing traffic. It’s undervalued. No brainer.

Oh well

So, uh, I totally know what Red Note is, but do you? I won’t believe you unless you explain it in excruciating detail.

Reddit is wild.

Who decided electric cars would be named by pulling spare keyboard parts out of a coffee can at random?