everything is fake and nobody knows what they’re doing 💞💞

once i learned how much of the michelin awards involves paying to play i got grumpy but i think any promotion at this level for our food scene is a big win. restaurants with at least 1 star get something like 25% more business. plus it probably means even better dining experiences for all of us.

heyyy i’m actually kinda terrified about the current state of world affairs

timberwolves are ass pass it on

happy long run sunday

help

“you’ve got a lot of bouncy balls. that’s cool.” — me trying to strike up conversation with my 3-year-old nephew

the timberwolves losing can’t hurt me

i feel nuts for not being invested in how astronauts pee in space bc it seems a buncha you weirdos do

three women with bangs…. ……six margaritas one good time

one thing about me.....................boy can i hold a grudge

in defense of april fools: my nephew left me a voicemail saying there's an elephant in my backyard and that's just pretty cute

gas is averaging $4/gallon, we're in a never-ending war and the company's annual report is off to the printer today, folks. all is well.

i sometimes can’t believe these two goofy losers eventually found each other

ayoooooo

i bet worship music would hit so hard if i were religious

based on a sample size of my office: everyone is sick and should go home

getting my husband to watch “grey’s anatomy” would be my magnum opus

potentially the most millennial thing about me is that i need a popsocket

i'm sorry but including or receiving an exclamation point in an email really takes the edge off

got emotional watching the OT from last night again everything's fine

bones 🦴 hyland

bones brings such good vibes

well folks i think today is the day….after 7.5 hours of watch time, we will get to mordor

what if i’m gollum for halloween

the 5K playing “sex and candy” as we’re down the street from the marcy playground is the move

truly incredible to have some of the kindest, sweetest, hottest and funniest friends around (if you think i’m talking about you i am)

vet office is closed friday, saturday and sunday so i get to wait until monday at the soonest to know if my dog has c*ncer 👍🏻

drank two alcoholic beverages and bragged about my monthly household electric bill to a friend i love being 39 !!!

current wolves players on the court are a dream blunt rotation

kinda wild but cool that i adopted the first dog that’s going to live forever

marty supreme shutout 2026 forever

it’s me: the tattooed liberal causing a ruckus at my parents’ retirement community in florida

oh no i’m a little high chatting with my mom and told her i want to run the twin cities marathon in october and she asked “why?” and i literally don’t know the answer

yes our flight home was canceled due to the impending snowstorm and we are stuck in florida for an extra day but at what cost??

at the airport there’s a 100% chance you’ll hear a mother yell “BRAXTON!!! BRAYDEN!!”

accidentally ended up at a show covered with hardcore kids

help! my inner child has adult money

dweeb vs. dork imo

someone who understands splits please look at my splits 🥹 chased a 5K PR and got ‘er

people who are good with numbers and math................good for you

my new fear is being in a movie theater when It Happens and not being able to celebrate immediately

i did my long run today bc tomorrow i am embarking on my LOTR journey by seeing the first film’s extended edition in the theater with stephanie !!! monumental times imo

9 miles……treadmill………..

don’t worry everyone the company’s annual report will still get done

if we can’t even mildly celebrate a zealous bigot who ruined lives being removed from her position what’s the point

marked safe from the baggu x disney collab

they closed the movie theater in my hometown years ago and just renovated it to be ..................pickleball courts

what do you do when you think a mutual is currently going through a manic crisis and is posting through it ...........

all hail donte divincenzo, white boy of the year