I can do nothing but eat birria landia and watch atla as cope for the last few days

Being on Bluesky is like the lib boomer propaganda equivalent to maga evangelical boomers on Facebook or the tech bro fascists on X lol

It’s near

I keep trying to seek in sex what is easier satisfied through creative works so why bother with a man even fr

All the Knicks and Juneteenth fireworks have my ellabella shaking like a leaf poor babyyyyy

When Kia gets married it will agitate me but I’ll accept it

Lowk I love my Kia

My relief is immense

Successsful execution of fly banishment

and why shouldn’t I! ?

what a life

Like I’ve become the holder of all the complexities ? I’m everyone’s counsel ?

This VA sabbatical has been much submersion in familial inter-generational pain. I’m not a primary in any of these but happen to be very present on the sideline

Submitted for one prize, submitted for one magazine comp, 4 agents queried. We continue on

Like idk maybe yall should be manifesting more to Blackout x Britney

But it will feel good when my dunk becomes public. I’m hella biding and positioning

Scrolled back through all my old chirps and it’s just me being an emo bitch talking KMS and complaining about Korean food and narrating ellyb day in the life lol

Yall are having fun and im dead fuck serious

Yall are having fun and I’m Glock serious

Thing is tho tbh I don’t really play. I should prob play more but I’m usually running deadass serious

Literally it’s just getting worse with time. Time is healing all in terms of Me and Self. Time is not healing all in terms of the fat mass of scar tissue around my Texas sized attachment wound carved out by a he-Devil

Like I’m so deep in here at this point I’m like catastrophic level avoidant attachment. 1% feeling of intimacy or attachment and I completely shut down and become scared of sex. Now I can’t even have sex bc being touched at all feels vulnerable

Like idgaf about him but fr the way love and romance and sex are all just ruined for me. Fucking awesome. Great!

I think I fucking hate my ex boyfriend lmao

Life can change any time any day

My problematic quality is I can really see myself living in France with those uppity ass French folk that the entire world literally disliked bc they are snooty and pretentious lmao.

God said to stop trying to dominate my own becoming

Just wait for my kinkspo

Twigs gonna love my shit

This is immense. 4/30/26, a Thursday, I have completed my most significant creative work to date.

It’s so fucking sick executing and completing

I met a goal today. Huge

I love writing

Personally when it comes to self describing via euphoria characters I am a Gia/Jules combo. And a Jules defender till I die (I don’t even watch the show lol)

And if I’m being honest, the doomscroll while Claude coding combo is lethal to the brain and is so addicting

Bro I don’t wanna work tomorrow at my corp job I want to work on my creative project ugH!

I love how it takes like 5 hours to realize the sensation I’m feeling in my body is physical pain and then my period drops

Yall always trying to save a buck. For $5 more I bypass the competition and dunk on you. Secured

Once again depopped out from underneath 5 offers. Yall gotta be faster than that mwaha

I have finished my first complete manuscript. I will spend the next month editing and fine tuning but it is here. And it is…….. awesome and dark and real and me and desperate and hopeful and intense and AWESOME and I’m stoked

spectacular things

God it’s so cool not wanting to kill myself for the last 3 days. I love it!!!!!! More of this !!!

I s2g that Pisces stellium all Pisces season was like being 20,000 leagues under the fucking sea I genuinely moved in slow motion and existed in the most dense fog mental sludge of recent memory

Wait do I not hate my job lol

Okay flexed on my superboss call today which makes me feel less like a POS at work

I love that Shannon does my taxes

I feel rejected by everybody but it’s just because I am rejecting everybody because I’m struggling to relate to others rn

What a temper tantrum yesterday lolllllll

And then I’m mad bc it’s like why can’t I be angry ? Why must I bend knee and be softened? The only way I can be mirrored is if I conform in this way and I resent it and then I’m angrier

This is also all such a huge contributor to the relational disconnect I feel because these are the days of soft and gentle Bible but I cannot relate so I just encourage other peoples softness and gentleness while not being seen in return bc anger makes ppl uncomfy so the response is to soften me