@jamesgunn.bsky.social I thought the new peacemaker episode was alright, don't listen to the haters.

@esjesjesj.bsky.social I hate you like I hate Aaron's bitch wife. I hope you fucking die on the moon because if I ever have to ghost hunt your ass I'm applying to be a door greeter at Walmart.

I'm in fucking hot water guys holy shit.

@jd-vance-1.bsky.social can my boy Aaron and I come hunt the ghosts of common sense at the White House? I've heard since it's death it's been spotted across the US in ghostly form. Also please don't look through my post history.

All jokes aside, what Aaron Goodwin had to go through is insanely sad and heartbreaking. Men, your mental health is important, you deserve to be loved and respected if you love and respect your partner, not lied to and cheated on and attempted murdered. Always seek help if you need it.

I think I have the shining

Gosh I hate waiting for my big person to finish burping me. They just manhandle me the whole time too and even if I've burped they just keep hitting me. it's just the worst part of being a ghost investigator. I did make big burpies today though and got a very good. I think I will shit myself.

I had been filling my Depends® extremely fast recently so I took some pills. I thought those helped until I reached in my pockets to pay for my large Shaqaroni® pizza from Papa John's I realized where it was all going. My pockets. My pocket were full of doodoofeces. This poltergeist is unfathomable.

Photos taken moments before paranormal disaster, a 🧵.

I'm sorry sir, I cannot afford my child support payment this month because my PayPal has been possessed by the spirit of a stock broker who mysteriously passed away in 1929. He keeps telling me to buy the dip. I don't know wtf he's talking about but I've spent all my money on salsa and queso.

Currently investigating a haunted gym, abandoned in the 1940's. This gym was home to the infamous 1940 Mr Worldwide muscle competition fire which took the lives of many strongmen. They keep asking me what I can bench, I've never been physically intimidated by a ghost before now.

This man has been floating around my museum for 5 days now. He keeps saying something about a meeting at the UN and Bob Dylan.

I can't believe Aaron's wife would hire a hitman. I have no clue who gave her that idea. Also I would never shove a stake through Aaron's heart because I think he's a vampire. That was just a joke...

Your ass is grass and I got the blunt wraps.

Hennyprivate why dont you ever post my page huh? Am I not good enough for you?

Hi, I'm Zak Bagans, when times get tough out there in the ghost hunting world, I need pants I can Depend® on the maximum absorbency of adult Depend®'s. When shit gets real, I know I'm real safe from shit running down my legs with Depend®'s on my side. My back side that is.

www.policeauctionscanada.com/Listing/Deta... Shit. Can someone buy my stuff back? I spent way too much money on meth and I didn't realize my place got raided man.

I investigated the location of a famous southern BBQ joint that burned down, taking all 175 people inside with it. They couldn't escape as the high amount of BBQ they had consumed resulted in the meat sweats, so they had no clue to the rising temperatures in the restaurant.

Ghost babies be like "boo boo ba ba"

I have spoken to the mcspirits. The mcrib has been brooding. It's ready for its mcreturn.

These ancient creatures call to me. Their desires are still left unknown.

Time is just a veil that covers our eyes from the truth, you can make the clock move backwards if you focus enough most people just don't believe the truth but I do thats why I can see there isn't such a thing as time it's just something big clock convinces us is true so they can sell us clocks

Just had the strangest feeling. Like I was invaded. I have no clue what happened but this was open on my phone so I figured this was the best place to document such an experience. It literally happened moments ago.

OOOAAAAAHHH OOOOOHHHHHA AAAAAAHHHH IM A GHOST HAUNTING THIS ACCOUNT AAAAHGH OOOOAAAHHHH

Did y'all see the ghost at the Grammys last night? Apparently there was an apparition when Kanye and his wife were on camera but something kept distracting me from the ghost so I didn't notice it.

10 years ago in 2015 I ebayed an unopened original "Happy Days" radio. 10 years later with no prior incidents and the radio will not stop playing "one of those days" by limp biskit. I don't want to ruin the value of my collectors item but I can't listen to this song again. Do I need an exorcist?

I be gooning my poltergeist til it astral projects ectoplasm all over the apartment floor.

name a better pokémon evolution

I pooped but when I wipied there was nothing there #ghostpoop

Sitting here in the dark when I was compelled to pull out my phone and take a picture, this is what I captured, completely real and totally unedited.

I dont care about all this politics shit wheres my japanese porn

@zakbagan.bsky.social @zakbagans01.bsky.social @zakbagans2.bsky.social @zakbagansparanomal.bsky.social @zagbagans.bsky.social @ghostadventure.bsky.social I'm renting an octagon and we're going to settle this like men you mother fuckers.

Been training. The world is not ready for the PWWE. (Paranormal world wrestling entertainment) We have already booked a chutes and ladders match between Abraham Lincoln and Timothy Leary.

Just watched the x games for the first time. Thought it had something to do with the paranormal. Pretty disappointed.

If you have a haunted house the ghost adventures crew would like to know about it! Please obtain an ectoplasmic sample for testing and at least 4 hours of undeniable proof of unexplainable activity and you could be featured in our new show "Bagans house payment"

Got mad and punched the wall. This is the power of the ghosts that radiates from me. I have no control over this. I need a new wall.

Penis poltergeist

I think my penis is haunted. It has a mind of its own. It controls me. I am no longer of free will. I am at the will of my freed willy. It's horrible. I must find a way to break this cock curse.

I need all my loyal followers to aim their chakras at @zakbagan.bsky.social This is a demon that must be abolished from our world. You may deplete your mana in the process of this so make sure to have your pipe nearby to refuel and rejoin the fight. We must rebox this dybbuk.

THESE GHOSTS GOT ME FUCKED UP

Heard I got a skinwalker on this platform... Aaron and I will go awaken the Groff for an investigation.

We're investigating what really happened when your dad went out for that pack of cigs. I know your mom told you he left you guys because he's broke and stupid but I have evidence he was abducted by skinwalkers and raised as one of their own.

I'm being haunted by my dinner. Ibs has been unmanageable. I think this may be the spirit that downs the Bagans.

THE SOULS OF MILLIONS OF DAMNED TURKEYS CALL OUT FOR ME FROM THE DEPTHS OF HELL WELCOMING A MILLION MORE TO JOIN THE SLAUGHTER. THERE IS NO SOLACE FOR THE SLAUGHTER OF THE FOWL.

Was using an ouija board the other day and was talking to a spirit named Quandale. Very nice gentle ghost, he was very passionate about history and loved rap music.

Sorry for the radio silence in the past few weeks. My trip turned up empty handed but I'm going to search again tonight. Getting my ghost devices prepped.