i'm back bitches. this is now everyone else's problem. also it's my birthday today. happy birthday me i guess.

last time i let jesus take the wheel he turned my water into wine, drove into oncoming traffic, and got me a dui. never again.

just spending all day every day hoping for someone to try and swing on me, just to see if i can still go

i wish life was like a tv show so i could leave for a commercial break and come back

i don't need "gentle exfoliation," i need my skin to be sandblasted with road salt

the adult urge to just have a toddler temper tantrum where you just flop on the floor and thrash your limbs about like a fish on a boat

imma tell my kids this was tyler, the creator

Kendrick Lamar writing "t.v. off"

I'm thankful for noise-cancelling headphones and YT shorts. Really coming in clutch today.

You ever get so high you invent a new emotion

@coheedandcambria.bsky.social Claudio and his hair have finally joined BlueSky! I must recommend anyone into rock/prog/pop-rock music take a listen to their music, with songs like "Welcome Home," "Blood Red Summer," and "Evagria the Faithful."

I have been followed, unfollowed, DMed, blocked, muted, hated, and befriended. But I have never been into diapers.

This is the most political I will get on this site, so bear with me. For those in the US, you have a right to bear arms for self-defense. I would take up that right ASAP, if you feel that the new group in power will try to harm you. Armed gays don't get bashed. Defend your equality.

It's guys out there who offer you a shoulder to cry on while they musty

Mama-type chicks with the big tiddies will hug you, face right in between, and ask "how you feelin, baby?" Ma'am, I'm finna go off half-cocked like a broken flintlock. At least lemme breathe a little.

Republicans are transphobic because they hate trans people. I'm transphobic because I'm afraid of saturated fats. Why are you so wet. Go away. The trans people are cool, but the trans fats? No.

My body, her choice. She's a goth mommy dominatrix and I'm afraid of her. No, seriously, she could snap me like a toothpick.

Fuck it gimme a shot. F1: Kimi Raikkonen, Sir Lewis Hamilton, Michael Schumacher Indy: Don't really watch, but it was Dan Wheldon. Probably Sato Takuma now. NASCAR: Chase Elliot and Dale Jr.

I am the barely-functioning homosexual.

not me wanting to have a bunnysona so bad i can taste it

i went to the voting booth yesterday & met an old man who said "thank you for going out & protecting your constitutional rights" it confused me because i saw him two days ago telling people to give up their human ones two hours later i had won & he was silent "issues," a poem by Derek Waterson.

A shotgun blast In the living room As you fall to the floor Bloodied and dying. A family snapshot Hangs on the wall Beside you. What will I tell the kids We havent even had yet? What will I say to God Before I kill him? I weep as you pack your things. "we're done," a poem by Derek Waterson.

Weird Sister, may we be a portent, A prophet word Burns down the streets Full of warring peoples. Say peace beats death, and Rocks are thrown through windows. Fires across the world bomb our soul. If this is the answer, We dont want to know the question. "Oracles," a poem by Derek Waterson.

The world is silent — brain's too quiet, Shut up everyone! I can hear myself think! A shockwave flies in the air, fired from a thought He has to keep in his eyes. Poor fella. The world caves in — Silently. I'm used to the heat. I like my showers this hot. "silent world," a poem by Derek Waterson.

www.poetryfoundation.org/poems/43187/... My all-time favorite 20th-century poem.

Doing something wrong once is a mistake, but doing the same thing wrong twice is a problem. Doing the same thing wrong twice, and convicing the audience you were right? That's jazz.

Hello, everyone. A little introductory statement for you. I'm Derek Waterson. I exist, write, sometimes do a little thinking. I like to post quotes and poetry sometimes. I may say some nonsense at times. Just let it happen. I'm off to write now. I will always accept ideas and critique. Thanks.

"We used to like talking about grief Our journals and letters were packed with losses, complaints, and sorrows. Even if there was no grief we wouldn’t stop lamenting as though longing for the charm of a distressed face." -Ha Jin, "Ways of Talking," first stanza.