Can I interest anyone in a picture of my baby Oscar and my baby Simon?

Ugh, I can’t with these cute boys.

Sometimes I wish I had a better, neurotypical brain and then other times I’m glad I’ve got a weird lil brain.

It’s a good sky

My sister just sent me my nephew’s 2nd grade school photo and I just can’t believe he’s so grown up 😭

One of my life goals is to never start a podcast or even be on one.

I hope Oscar is having a good day today.

One of my dreams in life is to just have a nice lil porch. And maybe a pizza oven but I’ll take just a porch.

I tell ya what HITS when you’re home from the bar after having a few g and ts is a nice bowl of Goya Mexican rice

It’s finally pants and jacket weather!!!!!!

Just 3 ears of sweet corn is fine for dinner

8:38am is NOT too early for salt water taffy

I don’t know what Hamilton is and I’m fine not knowing

ChatGPT hack: don’t use it.

Went to the NY state fair today

Tim Hill is the most underrated Yankees player

Do you ever have a day at work where you’re masking a little bit less than usual and your coworkers are a little weirded out because you’re not your normal self? Or is that just me

Please god I never want to be looped in

I don’t want to create any more accounts or remember any more passwords

Got my first massage over the weekend and now I need them all the time.

One of my very favorite things in the world is a novelty, personalized mailbox.

I think if you’re required to get verification codes to sign into work sites/programs, your employer should pay your cell phone bill. Thank you for coming to my TED talk.

Wish I didn’t have to refer to portions of the year as Q3, Q4, etc. I feel disgusted with myself every time I do.

I just saw a luna moth caterpillar and I hope I never see one again. No thank you, no no no.

I got these new pretzel earrings and I love em

Is there anything better than radishes and butter??

I love not having kids.

I don’t need to see GoPro umpire footage from Apple TV

The Apple TV yankees broadcast sucks

I’m in my tote bag era

www.mlb.com/news/jen-paw... We love to see it!!!! Go ladies!!!

I really do not fit in with these people I work with in any aspect whatsoever.

I keep telling my coworker I do not want physical copies printed out (of anything) and yet she keeps on printing them out for me and they go straight to the shredder.

It’s not my job to tell a coworker when she has a meeting on her calendar.

Hot take: I don’t think I should have to talk about my weekend with people I work with. The less these people know about me, the better.

“I don’t know who needs to hear this…” NOT ME SO STFU

If “don’t yuck my yum” is a phrase, I think we also should start saying “don’t yum my yuck”

It’s not my job to show a colleague how to use technology 🤷🏻‍♀️

People at work are always surprised how chill I am at work. Little do they know it’s because I don’t care about any of this work, none of it really matters.

Cilantro is one of the greatest things on earth ok?

Why can’t I just remember to close a goddamn cabinet in my kitchen?

Imagine you’re in the home run derby and you only hit 3 home runs

I think that’s a wrap on superhero movies. There’s too many

This is my cozy Oscar boy ok?

Someone please just do it already!!!!!

I’m just not sure the president of the USA should be allowed on social media.

This is my cozy Oscar boy ok?

I need you all to know that there’s a pro women’s baseball league starting in the US next year!!!!!!!! Finally women can play baseball!!!! I love baseball!!!!

I need you all to know that there’s a pro women’s baseball league starting in the US next year!!!!!!!! Finally women can play baseball!!!! I love baseball!!!!

Andrew Cuomo eat shit forever bye