Die Hard is a Christmas movie. Not all hymns are Christmas songs. Eggnog and gingerbread should be consumed year-round.

When I was a kid I wanted to be a journalist/reporter. It's just as well I pursued other things. There is no way I could stomach giving air to nothing but malicious lies. I sure af couldn't keep telling everyone how illegal, immoral & obscenely stupid things are, yet nobody is stopping any of it.

A suggestion for decent humans concerned about eating too much during this festive season: Read or watch the news for a few minutes. If you're truly one of the people on Santa's Good List, you'll feel too sick to eat. If it's a big news day, you may even vomit. No excess for you this year.

I want to let you all know that I will not rest. I will not be silenced! I will continue to work around the clock to be sarcastic & point out the useless (sometimes insulting) commentary surrounding these troubled times. I will wring my hands & be mid snarky in solidarity with you all! -WIP

WIP's razor: It's usually malice *and* stupidity. That is my #holidaygift to you. 🎁🤭😄

ANNOUNCEMENT! Stop sullying the Grinch! I refuse to allow anything else to be tainted with the poison of the Great Stain & Sychophants. Stop it.

I criticized @kamalaharris.com . Let the mass blockings begin! (She's a quitter, a coward, and an unapologetic self-server.)

I miss the days when people had personalities instead of diagnosis.

Is it me? Am I the only person in the world who doesn't want to see the graphic details of every illness and kink total strangers on the internet have? Y'all need to get close with people irl or dms to share that crap with.

The world we live in. I wonder if they edited out the parts about women being possessions or if they highlighted them. 🤔 😉

I think it's a gel.

Unpopular reality comment: just because it could be true, or is even probably true, that doesn't mean it *is* true .

George of the Jungle is an underrated movie.

And the DOJ is correct. That's the MO. Bulldoze it - literally and figuratively - then laugh at the cowards' crying and cussing about it when it's too late.

Another day, another blocklist. It's always a pleasure to be canceled by bullies who feel so threatened they have to try to influence others to fear the same things they run from.

Good god, people are thick as bricks.

I remember family members sharing calls & texts from their loved ones on Flight 93. It was chilling and horrific to just experience the empathy of what they were going through. 24 god-damned years later & the United States has allowed that gut-wrenching terror to be common. Vile, repugnant shame.

There are *so* many ways in which a person can earn my appreciation.

Hey! I'm looking for art streamers. Who should I check out? Analog artists get bonus points just because they're as rare as hen's teeth. 🐔🦷

There are *so* many ways in which a person can earn my animosity. 🤭

Somebody needs to inform the idiots that if they kill off everyone, there won't be anyone left for them to feel superior to. That'd probably work on the fkn moronic stains.

What's a subskeet? Nobody will tell me, but many people seem to like it when I ask. #WhatAWeirdGateToKeep #Subskeet #BadPoetry

I finally figured it out! I am as negative as most other people, but I don't luxuriate in sharing the sad, scary or upsetting aspects of my life. I do not feel good paying that shit forward. People prefer to engage with others who enjoy sharing unpleasantness. Poor fckn me. Have a lovely day! ⚘️🥀😭

I just went to do a quick double-check on a food safety issue. I got as far as typing U-S-D and then suddenly thought "Hellz no. I'll trust my memory and intelligence, not whatever crazy, flaming horse shit is on that site now." Just a few short months have detroyed every speck of credibility.

If your motto is "Ask for forgiveness, not permission" and you cross me or mine, you better start thinking: "Beg for mercy".

Some people always have to find a way to cast shame on people being proud of something. Judgment, virtue signaling? Dollars to donuts it doesn't come from a truly altruistic place.

Well, ack-shew-a-lee... 🙄

In minimally retouched photos, it can be very easy to tell what time of year it is based on the qualities of the light.

Holographic glitter makes me feel like I'm having motion sickness. Anyone else?

Honest question: is it possible to create a sustainable career as a visual artist who doesn't exclusively produce cute stickers or pleasant home decor? #NotAllArtIsPretty

Don't be an idiot. In fact, make it your weekend project. Call it a #challenge if that motivates you.

The asswipe I'm under contract to buy a house from refuses to give me money towards replacing the driveway he ripped out 2 wks ago. He insists on having the shit company he works for pour it in record-setting sub-freezing temps. Any lawyers wanna give me advice for when it goes to hell next month?

Every day 2-3 "Jennifer Aniston" accounts follow me on TikTok. I am not an Aniston fan, and only recall ever seeing one post with her in it. I did watch the entire clip because it was Stephen Colbert and puppies. Why am I not being followed by fake puppies and fake Stephen Colberts?

I'm starting a new 'social commentary' art project. It's going to require a separate bluesky account. Two? Three? Four? Five? 💥💫

Anger feels more powerful than pain.

And just like the 300+ million in the US continue to allow the destruction of democracy, the football fans will shrug, lay down their money and allegience to watch millionaires perform for billionaires.

Let's be clear. Talk is cheap. Let that sink in. ®️™️©️

I find the social media obsession with animal asses concerning.

But you can scream Merry CHRISTMAS! in everyone's face now, right?

Good afternoon. Today's performance will be lard-braised ridiculousness sauced with a reduction of the criminally inane. *Chew properly so you don't choke too much.

You are pathetic. No, not you! Yeah, you. You over there. Yes, yes, definitely you.

Screw science and facts! If you get away with doing stupid shit, it's not stupid. Get as many people as possible to do it too. Applies to every single thing that's fucking up the entire world. The Darwin award winners will take us all out with them. ™️

Why is everyone suddenly using "skedaddle" now? I've always been mocked for using it. Old-timey words and phrases are usually the best.

People find it very comforting to screw up the future by whining about the past that led to the present. Let that sink in. ™️©️®️

People in Pittsburgh say "dorn" instead of "during".

Anyone else notice that formerly reliable accounts are now sharing an abundance of obviously fake and/or completely unverified posts? It's almost like they want to sling dirt, but want the 'plausible deniability' to cover their own asses more. Hmm. 🤔

I'm losing my god-damned mind. That is all.

There has never been a time when more delusional humans roamed the Earth.

I LOVE OLD CONCRETE DRIVEWAYS & SIDEWALKS. It literally looks exactly like new "exposed aggregate concrete" that you will pay twice as much for* & will likely last half as long. *At least. Stop being gullible.

Happy Black Lung Friday, everyone!