I once held the door for Stephen Merchant coming out of the loo.

Gonna get the cheese out.

Because I’m a veggie, my mam made me a “beef” wellington with veggie sausage filling. Her decoration is a choice.

Waiting for @calumcam.bsky.social to come back with a puppuccino and a flat white, but I’m not saying who had what.

I’ve been to the gym twice. Why don’t I have giant muscles.

Forgot my headphones, forced to rawdog the gym

If I’m ever in the position of power, I’m bringing back the death sentence for people who have different coloured sets of lights on their Christmas trees.

The things I would do to Russell Tovey.

Choo choo

I think it’s about time we all admitted that Joanne is a good album (I’m listening to Joanne)

And the return Cardiff to Edinburgh, so glad it’ll be a Bonnie journey

Why does Trainline ask my preferences (front facing, table, no need to be near a toilet or luggage rack) only to place me backward, next to the toilet and luggage rack, with only the fold down.

If one of you could take the dogs out, that would be great.

You will be visited by three spirits

Really got my best side there

My girls.

Smiling for a change

I’m suddenly getting a lot of instagram ads for Viagra. What do they know that I don’t.

Polished the dome.

My ma and nieces are up this weekend, and yesterday arty asked to do the zip on my coat, she missed the catch at the bottom so the zip didn’t move nicely and she said “oh, sorry your belly is too big to do it up” Excuse me while I never recover.

“There’s pizza left; who wants another slice”

Need new headshots for a conference. Creative team at work unavailable to do them until February. So instead, they sent me, a F*g, instructions on how to take a selfie. Girl.

Sad, because I’d just seen how much more time we had left to play.

Desperately hoping the dogs don’t notice I’m awake because all I can hear is the pissing rain outside.

Sports go sports

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Second day in a row where I’ve eaten the lunch I brought from home instead of going to the canteen and buying chips. Follow me for more financial well being tips

List 3 things you think you’re known for and your followers will tell you if you’re right or wrong 1. Beardy 2. Baldie 3. World best rugby player

Managed about 2 minutes of Laura Kuenssberg before feeling sick to my boots at the deplorable rhetoric that passes for popular policy in this country.

What fictional creature/villain traumatised you as a child? But now we are besties

I miss the summwr

Shiny.

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Dressing as a bald bitch for Halloween

Preordered your Thebans Rugby calendar yet? No? Well get it here caledonian-thebans-rfc.square.site Profits support grassroots LGBT+ rugby and Waverley Care, Scotlands HIV and hepatitis charity.

I wonder what it would take to have napping including formally in my work plan.

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Looking to support a good cause? Want to look at Naked rugby players? Look no further then this years Thebans Rugby Calendar, starring yours truly. caledonian-thebans-rfc.square.site

Go team.

Hanging with my home girl

The tinge from the water case makes me look the pink power ranger

Mostly sweat at this point.

Went for a dip

Is he grabbing… a sword

Friday.

Athletic support.

Dog decided to bark from about 5:30, now he’s sleeping soundly on the couch. Might start howling at the top of my lungs and then just stare expectantly at him.

My anaconda don’t want none.

Age verification? I was told if I went to university and worked hard then a home would be affordable.