Would mixing a packet of hot cocoa with club soda make a delicious chocolate beverage or would it react like adding sugar does and create a foamy explosion

Is a chapati just an Indian tortilla, because it looks close enough that I'm going to make soft tacos with it.

Let's see if I can cut my hair without screwing it up this time.

*Internal screaming*

Maybe cats aren't bothered by farts because to them humans just smell as if they're constantly farting. That would also go a long way in explaining why they always have that look of smug superiority. That's right, farter. Now fill my bowl again and give me scritches.

If you celebrate Stone Cold Steve Austin Day, gimmie a hell yeah!

I wonder why I've never seen porridge with gravy on top.

Hey. So oven doors can get pretty hot when the oven's on. You should not, for example, lay your bare arm on it because the rack was actually lower than it looked.

I'd like to start this new culture where interest is generated by curiosity rather than outrage, but too many things annoy me, so someone else is going to have to do it.

It's really weird to watch the Democratic Party talking about gas prices when the illegitimate President they refuse to impeach is invading countries, removing their head of state, and dropping bombs on schools. Though when I say "weird", I don't mean "surprising".

Why do I need passwords at all if I can just get two or three authenticators.

I got turtle poop water in my mouthaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhh

Imagine how different modern music would be if nobody was allowed to say "yeah" or "woah".

Oh god, nothing lets you know how squishy and useless you've gotten like holding stuff and moving.

I just tried to stop mid-stride and my forward momentum kept pulling me so much I had to robot dance to avoid falling on my face. It's not something one ever expects to happen.

Revolutionary idea: In any game with a percentage-based hit system, anything over 75% will never miss. Do not actually change any numbers, just have a flag or something so that if your hit chance is 75% or higher, it will not miss. Do not put this information in the game, just let people be happy.

If I could just pick what I hyperfixate on, I'd be so rich.

YouTube should have a setting where it never suggests anything ever unless I specifically search for it.

I contend it is impossible to stay awake with a snoring cat nearby.

Is it safe to open a microwave immediately after it stops or does a cloud of neutrinos waft in your face.

It's that fun time when my brain realizes that four hours' sleep isn't enough, but also when the brain pills that keep me awake kick in so I'm simultaneously too stimulated to sleep and too exhausted to function. It's like my own personal golden hour, except the gold is piiiiiiiiissssss

Kinda weird that pretty much every Dragon Ball game for the past 20-odd years has been the same exact game with slightly different textures.

I have chicken thawing and no idea what I'll make with it. The suspense is palpable.

Of every house in the neighborhood, why did two dumbass cats choose right underneath my window to scream and claw each other at 4am

First taffy attempt has yielded an inedible sugary rock. I'm guessing it either got too hot or I let it settle too long before I tried stretching it. Or maybe both. I have no idea. All these dumbass recipes only mentioned it being too soft.

If they ever perfect teleportation technology, I want to put it in my underpants so I never have to find a bathroom again.

What I like is clicking the post button and typing a bunch of words that don't actually appear because a little popup telling me about the reply settings moved the window focus. This may be a petty complaint, but it's still annoying, dammit.

You have until the count of ten to return my stolen hour or there will be HELL TO PAY

It would be nice if Darktide did events that weren't total shit.

The thing with ice cream sandwiches is even the crappiest, gas station brand offering is going to be pretty good because it's still an ice cream sandwich.

Notice how much bipartisan support votes on releasing Epstein files get. You can't avoid it, because Democrats talk about joining their Republicans friends whenever they can. But then AG Bondi keeps holding back, illegally aiding a coverup. So why don't they impeach her? Don't they want the truth?

I half-expect the bathroom light switch to either electrocute me or burst into flames the next time I flip it on, but the other half has decided that's an acceptable risk to fiddling with it.

It's so tedious having to eat stuff every few hours so my limbs don't turn all watery. Why can't I just suck on something all day and get nutrients from that?

Wait, Alter Bridge is just Creed with a different singer? Oh my god. OH MY GOD

The internet is 90% bots, everything you see is AI-generated slop, and we're each locked in a little closet screaming into a void of our own making. Aaaaaaaaahhh!!

I think a bot colony or something latched onto one of my posts. That's annoying.

I think curry and hash browns is an idea that has potential.

Just had to stop and look for my pants pocket, so that's a great sign of getting enough sleep.

Again: Not hyperbole, misinterpretation, or a joke that Christian Dominionism is a strain of apocalyptic accelerationism which VERY LITERALLY SEEKS to hasten their vision of the Biblical end of the world, & the people who believe this have VERY CAREFULLY worked their way into the halls of U.S. power

More people should really stop and take notice when the supposed opposition party is calling a war illegal and unconstitutional, but will not suggest consequences of any kind for starting it. They're also subtly de-escalating the severity by pretending this was solely an issue of permission.

One of the greatest comedies of our time. youtu.be/vR6-pOxwdoA?...

Hey, whatever happened to Senators Elissa Slotkin and astronaut hero Mark Kelly with their video about the military not following illegal orders? Have their phones been ringing off the hook? Kind of strange they don't mention it now, with such a glaring example of it available.

Wait, some of these tortilla chips DON'T have lime on them. What's going on here?!

Oh god I didn't know these tortilla chips were lime flavor. I thought there was something wrong with them.

I'm a little torn on the "womp womp, the liars lied again" posts, because while I guess it's important to show when and where they're lying, if you haven't already grasped by now that the liars will always lie, I assume it's because you were spending all this time staring into the sun.

The bathroom light suddenly resumed working again. I have no idea why. This can only be attributed to divine intervention.

Funny how none of the "progressives" in Congress can even say the word impeachment. Even if they were too complicit to submit articles, even if they were too gutless to force a vote, they could still say "the President is a criminal and a murderer who should be removed from office" and not one will

In hindsight, maybe there should've been some kind of law against another nation's government being able to set up a piggy bank here that allows them to buy politicians for both parties.

Shitheel: "I'm going left." Media: "He says he's going left." Populace: "A lot of people are saying he's going left, maybe they have a point." Congress: "While he's going left, what about the egg prices." Shitheel: *Goes right* Everybody: *Surprised Pikachu*

Only a cursory examination so far, but I can see a number of Democrats in Congress calling Iran a bunch of terrorists and not one of them saying the lunatic rapist in the White House should be impeached for violating the law and Constitution to murder people, not for the first time.