Slept for 1hr last night im for sure fuckin my heart up at this point lole

hhhhggf #tombetching

boggles my fucking mind. ive drawn their character multiple times now man why are you hitting me up to be like 'uhhh did u knowww this person online is Twying to Be Yew' like get fuckin lost im busy

ive been getting messages here and there ranging from slightly mean-spirited to Just Mean regarding a friend of mine because the sender is under the impression said friend is "imitating" me, and honestly im getting a little sick of it. wtf has gotten into you people. grow up

Shadow Lugia 🎃 #tombetching

Shadow Lugia 🎃 #tombetching

Man am i sickkk of the corniness on this site. Every now and then i wonder why i never check feeds and then im immediately reminded almost every time If ur 25+ you have no business donning an air of authority and posting vapid peepee poopoo leftbait shit like we’re 15 on tumblr again get real man

Not at all a new observation but the amount of obviously fake donationbait “im queer and stuck in a sub-saharan refugee camp” accounts on here is so fuckin creepy and gross man lmfao its insane how many there are

There have been a couple comm inqs ive been sent in the past couple months that had me running around with my hands up celebrating like im ronaldo bc ive wanted to draw the character for sometimes several years fuckkk online rules sometimes

Also for the record, as insane as it sounds considering the total, i see all the comm inquiries and remember ALMOST all of them. Partially bc im good with names, but also bc i have to manually parse all the google drive links out for the refs that get sent in

Ive been getting a lot of “how the hell are u getting so many weird inquiries” over the past couple months and i really should clarify that the current amount of inquiries is >600 if you include dupes, multiple ideas, spam, etc. goes without saying some of them are gonna be notable lol

Also dude, quite a few recent comm inquiries that’d best be described as ‘Orders’ ??? “You will” do this, “you must” do that. “Not optional”, “I expect—“, “promptly” Bro no shot im taking those, like im half expecting to be ordered to drop and give them 20 at the end of these inqs

still in a good mood but ive had so many weird furry interactions recently i dont know whats going on lmfao Someone sent me a comm inquiry last night asking for a complex bg as an additional fee because i “really should be doing more of them” LMFAO great first impression man

Dude there are like 3-4 ppl who unfollow and refollow me literally every time i post a piece of art on my nsfw wtf. Theres one dude whos done it almost 20 times now im so close to just blocking on account of how weird it is

Its almost cartoonish how hard my mental health pivoted and has been speeding in the opposite direction just bc i suddenly decided i was being an idiot and started being social again Like im still dealing with some weird health problems i gotta solve, but mentally ive been feeling pretty great

my wife is german and when she visited chicago with me she asked if the tap water was poisoned lol

that all being said, ill never not laugh thinking about how somber xeal got visiting here for nearly 2wks because chicago is obviously nothing like brighton The mental image of them wistfully staring out the passenger window at the black ice caked road and dark streets will always make me Lole

Honestly the fact that i care so deeply about the city i live in probably makes the sting of everything going on much more painful than if i was fully prepared to leave the country. Its like a crisis of faith lmfao

Man it fuckin succkkkss to be fully conscious of just how bad the soc/pol/econ climate is in the US right now while still loving the city i live in Like its easy to picture how much better your life would be anywhere else, but ex. where else would i have this broad of access to foreign goods lmfao

gotta love ppl who only msg u when they want something or to show off what theyve been doing + not ask about you lmao classic online weirdo flavor

Started joining and hosting group calls again and its almost comedic how fast my freeking Mental has improved

fuck my piss ass ideot life i subscribed to a new internet provider and ordered a new gateway, only to discover it requires coax and all the cables leading out of the house have been snipped by previous providers Stuck with my ancient ass terrible internet for now i guess

Sleep auuh then ill do more server stuff

ok im legit setting it up any mutuals interested can hmu here or disc

Considering the idea of setting up another loose rules work server for budz its been ages since ive had one running i miss the energy

Multiple friends telling me over the past month or two that they thought i went on a seemingly indefinite hiatus because i stopped posting to twt close to a year ago Bro my twt name literally has my bsky handle in it.

I gotta figure out how to go about getting checked for bipolar disorder without spending a million dollars out of pocket. I’m not going to commit to the idea that i absolutely have it, but the fact that my wellbutrin isnt touching my depression and i have such intense happy/sad swings…

hey youtu.be/m0ng-IumMHg?...

Fuck man keth writing a heartfelt thread about how i helped encourage him to draw is gettin me misty at work maybe my life isnt complete ass lmfao

thank you basedDog keep it real in the free world or whatever lord give this man strength he needs it, god's strongest soldier

Sorry to the people who hmu to check on me and got no response — i promise its not you, im just like that. Ill fire stuff off here to get it out of my head and then do everything in my power to pretend it was never there to begin with. I appreciate the thought nonetheless

man this is fucking embarrassing i hate coming here to post about how much pain im in, i hate the idea of being a fucking vibekill and dumping it on a friend, and i hate that im left to just sit here absolutely paralyzed, doing nothing because every part of my brain is screaming. im so tired

man i really need to just shut the fuck uppp sometimes god

its also really weird bc, despite it all, im still generally really happy. like 80% of the time im operating on a scale that fluctuates between a 7 and 10. it only drops below a 7 late at night when im just here at my desk working in silence lmfao. im starting to legitimately wonder if im bipolar

i should probably state for the record (bc i know my posts can get pretty fucking grey on here) that i dont have any plans of doing anything drastic, in any sense of the word, so dont worry about all that. this is effectively me burping my way thru a friday night tie-loosening, 4-beer-deep bar spiel

ik the catalyst here is a horrible multi-year slow-cooking stew of increasingly poor health, an increasingly poor diet, PROFOUNDLY poor sleep + a god-awful sleep pattern that sees me wide awake when nobody else is online, an abysmal, bone-obliterating 100hr/wk 2 job split, etc feels inescapable tho

i kinda hate how badly the last year or so has decimated my confidence in my own friendships man like im in a perpetual state of expecting any of them to end at any point, so im like constantly and usually wrongfully worried a couple people are just not fucking with me for some inexplicable reason

Man i wish they made audio posts for this site so i could simply Tell you some of my work stories as opposed to typing them out its not the SAME

honestly, after i heard abt tht girl getting fired within the week, it immediately reminded me of all the ppl i would see on twt/fa constantly opening emergency comms with a money goal tht kept increasing, who'd get hired and fired 2-4 times a month, claiming wrongful term. each time lol

also oh man i forgot to even post about this lmfao someone my coworkers referred to as "furry girl" got hired as a day seasonal temp and got herself fired in a single week because she utterly refused to clean a bathroom stall - something everyone does. "thats a job for ugly people, sorry." LMFAO

Im not immune to the humor in watching a completely unreasonable, manipulative freak start hydroplaning when they realize their epic tactics arent foolproof, but theres something about a full extinction burst thats nauseating to watch. Like some doomed animal chewing its limbs off to escape a trap

still cant get over how sick this persons footage from hospital fest osaka was

time to pull the ole XENIA1 collages back out

weather radar furry followed me on FA and commissions art of their oc looking at real ass radar imagery holy fuck PULL UP MAN PULL UP

normally id feel flattered that someone did a study of something ive drawn, but to have someone who just followed me post a stealth study of something i drew 9 years ago on tumblr is just weird enough that im a little taken aback lol

one friend asked if i did anything nice for my bday and i told them i pulled 13ish hrs, came home, ate some sticky rice and a protein bar for dinner, and worked on comms They were so mad they stormed off and came back later to tell me i should have done something nice Like ok with what money lol

the people whove freaked the fuck out on me for not wishing them a happy birthday in the past not pulling up for literally any of mine who would have seen that comin LMFAO