you guys want some sam lore? when i was in high school, i was a tech youtuber. some fly by night chinese company offered me $100 for a sponsored video on their app, i accepted, but then they downloaded my video and re-edited it as reviews for all of their other […] [Original post on hachyderm.io]

cursed https://reddit.com/r/LegacyJailbreak/comments/1rltrtl/ipad_1st_generation_on_ios_70/

hey sorry for the delay, the gay tech mafia meeting ran long. btw you were asked to bring paper cups and plates for next month

did you notice the hidden message in the macbook wallpaper? it says “DARKNESS CONSUMES ETERNAL SUFFERING RAINS DOWN UPON THE WRETCHED SOULS OF THE LIVING AAAAAAAA THE FREEMASONS KNEW ALL ALONG AAAAAAAA BAPHOMET BAPHOMET BAPHOMET THE CRIMSON COVENANT HAS BEEN SEALED IN BLOOD AN

Ordered the absolute base model Neo for curiosity’s sake. I want to know what Apple thinks is the minimum viable Mac experience. I can see this thing getting marked down to $399 and $499, it’s gonna do gang busters, but those users are not gonna know about memory or any of the limitations.

hello old friend

We have another design team opening at Tavus for a Brand & Product Designer! If this strikes a chord, DM here or electronically mail me with a resume/website/portfolio/whatever you have (sam at tavus dot io) #getfedihired #FediHire #jobs

I just can’t get over HOW FUCKING UGLY the Tahoe dock is dude

MacBook Ne-Yo as in the 2000s rapper gimme a minute i still need to formulate a joke but i have claimed this territory

RE: https://mastodon.social/@pxlnv/116163542421409945 hot take but for all this talk about “highlighting my content” i actually don’t give a rats ass about my content. gimme fun title bars. if i wanna focus on my content, i would print it out.

idk, a doctor seeing medical imaging on anything beyond the most mediocre 1080p Dell monitor is off-putting to me. in the way that you’d feel weird if a doula pulled up in a corvette with a punisher sticker

agh well i didn’t want to keep my upcoming paycheck anyway

I don’t think any of you realize how dire the state of password management is. The lady next to me on this flight just logged onto the flight wifi by entering a password from her notes app. Then, on her work computer, she had a google sheet named “master password list” including one entry for […]

Ayatollah entering hell with an entrance line like the drag race werkroom and then the rattlesnake sound plays when the camera cuts to dick cheney

do you remember that thing before browsers had integrated search/url fields where, if you typed a search query into the URL field, it would redirect to a SERP owned by your ISP? absolutely wild.

you could not write a more 2008 sentence if you were given a year

war today queen?

RE: https://hachyderm.io/@samhenrigold/116144902276218864 With all due respect did the person who wrote “displays real hands” breastfeed on rocks as a baby

app review didn’t like my video or the fact that I said “for iOS” in the subtitle or the fact that I added the opener to Pride and Prejudice in the release notes. this is what 1984 warned us about. probably. i didn’t read it.

i saw this yesterday and the concept of spinning up nano banana to draw a rectangle on a screenshot kinda made me want to scream

Going onto fox news to fear monger about minified JS. “parents, do you know what your children are seeing when they press F12? your kids will start writing !0 instead of true. they’ll write things like `!function(e,t,n){}` — this is not an accident.”

RE: https://hachyderm.io/@samhenrigold/116116185332872854 kinda surprised nobody has noticed the About screen text yet

idk why my WireView video blew up on YouTube (apparently 90% of the views came from the YT home page) but it now has 23k views lol https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZQ9XTSt5Hms

(hushed tone) listen if we all use UIDesignRequiresCompatibility they can’t take it away this year

Kinda curious how shitpost-y they’ll let me get in the release notes field

alan dye will burn in hell for enforcing squircle prison unto the macintosh. give me the pokey-outy bits or give me death

any time it gets tough i just remember who i’m fighting for

cool they involved NASA JPL https://coolhunting.com/tech/crafting-the-cosmos-the-design-behind-apple-vision-pros-environments/

useful frame going into the midterms this year

Introducing WireView, a new tool for the iOS developer workflow. It’s primarily for me but you can have it, too. https://apps.apple.com/us/app/wireview/id6756973128?mt=12

RE: https://hachyderm.io/@samhenrigold/116091841651172685 in theory LLMs SHOULD be the best linter tool for picking up anti patterns and code smells. this tide SHOULD rise all boats to a level of engineering rigor and perfection that otherwise would be infeasible to enforce at a wide scale […]

has anyone run into this #swiftui issue on iOS 26 where segmented controls in a toolbar will scale from zero every time the scroll pocket appearance changes? any workaround?

RE: https://mastodon.social/@Gargron/116097907320996080 if any of my friends are listening, I have a price available upon request and it is negotiable

can someone please walk me through how infeasible it would be to buy a beater M1 MacBook Air, disassemble it and try to jam its guts into a clamshell iBook

CAReplicatorLayer is pretty much goated when replicating a CALayer is the vibe

I know it’s not the point of OpenClaw but holy hell that codebase is inscrutable. I’ve noticed this pathology with mostly agent-written projects where agents only optimize locally. Because they’re good at reward hacking, each session adds the bare minimum scaffolding to satisfy the immediate […]

Jar Jar Binks at therapy: Meesa just… meesa have so many things on meesa plate. Meesa saying yes to everything because meesa not wanting to be disappointing anyone, and then meesa drowning

gonna start doing the chuck schumer method in slack (starting every message with “@here This is Sam Gold.” and attaching a photo of myself

resume with a free space like in bingo

rural jurors and acquisitions

obsessed with the idea of someone doordashing from AMC.

God is either impotent to alter His universe or ignorant to the horrors taking place in his kingdom

you know what man fuck you

economy so bad they got mcnuggets listed as market price

so he’s just not gonna say anything or…

i’m not advocating for WWIII, but if it broke out, it would technically make my apartment a charming pre-war

We launched a new emotional intelligence model at Tavus and I got used in the demo. I already sorta knew I was an exhausted, lopsided bitch but now we know for sure. https://www.tavus.io/post/raven-1-bringing-emotional-intelligence-to-artificial-intelligence

an appeal to Swift package developers: wherever possible, use `#​if canImport(UIKit)` instead of hard-coding platform checks