There are few things more terrifying than a HomePod with the death farts when you're chopping vegetables. listening to a podcast and then, at full volume, BLARGHHHHHHHHHH(pop)

Erm…so that just happened. *nervous laugh* Okay but like… that’s a thing now? That’s… that’s actually happening? *glances around awkwardly* ummmm he’s right behind me, isn’t he? So anywho! Democracy! That’s…that’s still a thing we’re doing, right? Right guys? *crickets* Well this is… this is […]

been practicing youtuber thumbnail faces

how many nights in a row can I have charcuterie for dinner before it becomes a cry for help

don’t care, didn’t ask. stg these are the most fragile people in the world

sometimes i send people videos over imessage instead of voice memos. i’m clearing out space so i’m gonna post some without context. most of the time it’s just me workshopping impressions

i tried

i’ve been seeing this guys face way too often recently

please enjoy this video from a real apartment listing I just saw

I tried the new dual camera recording feature and ran the file through ffmpeg, turns out there’s a little property that gets set for these kinds of recordings: `com.apple.quicktime.front-and-back-camera-composition`

referring to one’s juicy dumper as their “iconic plateau”

got a new phone. so much memory, way more CPU/GPU cores. such a shame that i’m only going to run the same react native and flutter garbage on it. buying a mclaren to drive to mcdonald’s and back

Tragic news: I’m actually having a good time mixing the transitions in the Spotify update. I know. I’m just as bummed as you are. But some of the transitions are diabolical 🔥

YOU ARE THE DISRUPTION TO MY PRODUCTIVITY

I love the box that says "abortion pills" in italic thin serifs. I want more stuff labeled like that. Every box of Tylenol should say HEADACHE PILLS https://www.eff.org/pages/when-knowing-someone-meta-only-way-break-out-content-jail

i don't remember this episode of Brooklyn 99 https://mastodon.archive.org/@internetarchive/115227077083500616

kimmel

starting to become less enchanted by Tailwind

why is he yelling at me https://youtu.be/TcHY0AEd2Uw

tapping the sign once again https://hachyderm.io/@samhenrigold/113857041772370410

hard to express how quickly I would devour a modern version of this https://archive.org/details/inside-mac-os-x-system-overview

listen i appreciate what spotify is trying to do but good god girl this is ludicrous

just learned that you can long press the voice memo play button in imessage for 2x speed

due to some absurd circumstances, I now own a 30 pin video adapter so I can screen record an iOS beta firmware from 15 years ago this is an iPhone 4 on iOS 5 beta 2. it doesn’t officially support display mirroring, but you can trivially enable it through a […] [Original post on hachyderm.io]

my god these people are hysterical https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=45252378

going through my youtube liked videos from my old account. i liked this in 2011 when I was 9. idk man this probably broke my psyche in some unexplainable ways https://youtu.be/9WZGyzz5O-U

absolute garbage. useless.

yes WannaCry was very evil but also the interface design was dogshit. equally as important. two competing countdowns? a wall of text with the random instructions buried in this scroll view?? amateurish lock clipart??? bleak stuff.

I still love that you can long press on an expanded notification and get writing tools to pop up. Watching it make notifications “friendlier” is really funny. Great news!!!

i could use an orange rn. tangerine. mandarin. really anything in that cinematic universe

cancel your preorders, the new iphones are going to explode and kill you instantly

current favorite development pattern is defining `doSomething` and, separately, `actuallyDoSomethingForRealThisTime`

shout out to @thebittergreen and @sindresorhus for just putting out a ton of useful Mac apps. like an honest to god "collect them all" situation https://sindresorhus.com/apps https://www.mothersruin.com/software/

we wish you a very skibidi rizzmas

aaaany day now

slightly undercut by (i’m guessing) an out of towner saying to her friend “…that’s it?”

when they wanna name a new gay club they just pick a random blender setting and go with that. pulse. purée. crush ice. whip.

2016 LA probably went crazy. lease a G Wagon, get yourself one of those urban outfitters phone cases with the selfie light and a starbucks drink with 70g of sugar

would love for this property to become a thing in CSS. increasing the hit area for an element without affecting its actual layout is a train wreck of dirty pseudo-element tricks https://github.com/w3c/csswg-drafts/issues/4708

similarly, live your life in a way where this doesn’t happen when you die https://butts.team/@zenhob/115181580092797616

wrong guy but i'll take what i can get. fuck it, we balling tonight

legend says she died on the can

sometimes I feel like I need to be humbled. when this happens, I fly to Europe, book an airbnb, and spend three hours trying to figure out how the tiny terrible washing machine works.

I’m guessing the “iPhone Air” name was last minute, there are still a couple straggler references to “iPhone 17 Air” on the website in alt text and some regional pages.

dude im dying. its the weed number. no you’re not getting it: its the number of WEED. lol. lmao. dude im pissing myself this is CRAZY ahaha damn absolutely wild lol

@samhenrigold oops I thnik i had a bit much

FAMILY GROUP CHAT IS AMPED UP FOR THE APPLE EVENT

new web stack: NERF No JS Excel as the database Rawdogging HTML FTP deployment

a few years ago when they had that evening keynote for the macbooks, i had a glass of wine with it and thought “wow, drinking makes these hour-long infomercials way more palatable” with that in mind, i propose airport rules for apple events going forward