i read a chapter in a monograph that ended with a block quote. what sort of chaos is that?

I’m at the lavender farm. I’m at the camel sanctuary. I’m at the combination lavender farm camel sanctuary.

since my book is about german intellectuals, watching germany’s world cup matches counts as research

i’ve trained my teenager to send me photographs of any piles of free books outside

first time i’ve ever seen polygamous on a medical form

my mom doesn’t really know what we’re talking about when my brother and i start talking about the world cup in the family chat, but she does seem very happy to see her boys talking with each other

FYI Tȯr: Germany scores one goal Tör: two goals To⃛r: three goals, and so on

patriotism mogged by the dude at the beach wearing an american flag bathing suit, an american flag baseball cap, american flag tank top, and a pulisic jersey

i have so many pdfs i need to performatively read

i don’t think i should have to return interlibrary loan books to universities that rejected me for jobs

why does bro need extra ears?

my kid told me it wasn’t fair that i got to watch the world cup but she had to go to bed, and i had to agree

posting about sportsball automatically makes you lose all your intellectual points

my opinion about fellow academics is entirely determined by whether or not we are mutuals on social media

With the expansion of the World Cup it should be nearly impossible for Germany not to advance out of their group again, but I have faith they can do it.

there are so many people i want to thank for this immense honor. most of all myself of course.

my kid found this drawing

my wife called the champions league final the battle of the arabic airlines

u can find me in da club (the Online Enlightenment Club’s discussion of slavery in the eighteenth century)

i feel like i personally really deserve a new vampire weekend album

checked to see what my alter ego has been getting up to

the cart at the apple store

Me: What do I look like? 16: My dad. So basically a servant.

my eldest kid heard fans shouting let him die at sounders games as a kid, came to expect that, and is now disappointed every time that other soccer fans don’t display the same aggression

How do I tell the dad at the pool who is wearing a Wittgenstein t-shirt that I think we should be best friends?

the only possible response to this week’s disclosures of shoddy scholarship in the sciences and social sciences is to drastically cut the humanities

two dumb bitches

i won twitter

my kid made fun of me for buying another gingham shirt, and i shouldn’t have to tolerate such violence

checking in on my alter ego

feeling very violated right now

Do economists act the way they do because they studied economics or did they choose to study economics because they act the way they do?

excellent ad targeting

mentioned to an undergrad that i had a sixteen year old kid, and i don’t think he had realized i was old enough to be his father

7: Dad, do you know you don’t know anything? Me: Yes 7: No, you don’t.

double screening two academic talks right now

it’s always important to remain humble as an academic, but i do think i am deserving of a festschrift in my honor

my imposter

what sort of asshole would tweet an image like this?

my youngest inducted me into the demon hunters

it’s cute that he changed his profile photo after my quote tweet

dressed up today. i’m wearing my nice gingham shirt.

twenty year old student said he feels unc. thought about asking how I should feel at my age but opted not to.

My students didn’t know the German word for cocaine. I failed them.

my kid made a red card for half time of the City Arsenal game

I don’t know exactly what terrible thing led to me getting $90 via a class action lawsuit, but I definitely wouldn’t mind if it were to happen again.

lmao

thanks to STEM i know this is a trick question

i think “phony who's basically a quirk chungus male with a bit of academic affectation” might be the most accurate thing anyone has ever said about me

“faculty meeting after party” is a combination of words i never thought I’d hear