Aromantic, asexual, and aspec people know just how healing visibility is. Being told we're broken before we even have the chance to understand our experiences makes finding language and community so important in recognizing that our identities are a part of what makes us whole

Being aromantic, asexual, or aspec isn’t about what’s missing. It’s the freedom to live beyond narrow expectations. Joy can be found in community, creativity, and self-discovery within our personal boundaries. Our value isn’t measured by romance or sex, but by the lives we create

Everyone, regardless of identity, can benefit from learning about aromantic, asexual, and aspec experiences. They broaden our view of intimacy, showing that purpose can be found in countless ways beyond the traditional frameworks of romance and sex, creating space for everybody

Aromantic and asexual identities aren't the result of unfulfilled allonormativity. Centering our quality of life around how we interact with attraction and its associates perpetuates that we're incomplete when our orientations and experiences are a part of what makes us whole

There's no wrong way to be aromantic, asexual, or aspec. Intimacy is such a diverse concept that allows for different meanings and associations based on ones own desires and boundaries. All the ways in which we navigate our identities are important, and I think that's beautiful

Accessible language surrounding aromantic, asexual, and aspec identities is essential for creating visibility. When people are told they’re broken before having the ability to understand themselves, words become a lifeline that shows their experiences are real, valid, and shared

For me, being aromantic and asexual is just as much of a political identity as it is a personal one. Breaking down normative structures and rejecting the imposition of intimacy, desire, and connection as determined by others is such a huge part of how I navigate the world

To disregard the value of aromantic and asexual intimacy, and the nuances that come with it, is to be ignorant to varied social dynamics and perpetuate a hierarchical view of relationships established by harmful frameworks that aren't inclusive to everybody's experiences

As an aroace person, I dont want someone who feels like being with me is a sacrifice. In the way that I respect unwavering priorities, I need an understanding of the impact my identity has on me. Everyone should get what they want out of relationships, including aroace people

The idea that aromantic and asexual people "haven't met the right person yet" plays into the belief that we're missing out on intrinsic experiences and haven't truly discovered ourselves. It perpetuates that we're incomplete when our identities are a part of what makes us whole

The concept of intimacy must transcend traditional ideas of sex and romance. When these attractions are viewed as inherent for a deep connection, it pressures an experience onto people without giving them the tools necessary to evaluate what they actually want for themselves

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A common conclusion that aphobes come to about why people identify as aromantic or asexual is that we're unattractive, which operates under the assumption that our identities are performative but is often a projection of their own misconseptions surrounding our orientations

It's unfortunate to me that asexuality in media is presented as less interesting or multifaceted than allosexual identities despite being an orientation that is incredibly varied and can add a lot of dimension to a character or plot line while also providing representation

The misconception that asexual people are naive to sexuality comes from the idea that attraction, followed by action, is seen as a prerequisite to maturity and ignores that many of us have to dissect and understand attraction in order to come to the conclusion that we're ace

While aromantic and asexual people can have healthy partnerships, centering our acceptance and quality of life around that idea does more harm than good. We are deserving of respect and inclusion regardless of how we interact with intimacy and the actions associated with it

Reimagining partnership as an aromantic person means finding love in community. Friends, chosen family, queerplatonic bonds, and so many other types of connection are so important, not because they imitate romance, but because the weight of those relationships stand on their own

Being aromantic, asexual, or aspec isn't about absence, it's about presence. Being able to connect with others on our own terms means we get to define intimacy in ways that honor our boundaries and craft relationships that feel meaningful and authentic beyond societal expectation

Aromantic, asexual, and aspec people aren't JUST valid, we're valuable and deserving of a space within the queer community. Letting people know we exist without actually allowing our voices to be heard isn't enough anymore

Aromantic and asexual people often have our identities met with attempted explanations rather than belief in our own self-understanding. They not only try to console us over a general misrepresentation but also ignore the time we spend discerning our experience before coming out

Aromantic and asexual joy is so important, yet it's often overlooked because our identities are viewed as inherently isolating or limiting. That idea ignores how much love, connection, and meaning exist when you're able to express the weight of it in the same way that you feel it

Recognizing aromantic, asexual, and aspec identities as valid means absolutely nothing if you actively refuse to include us in queer spaces and conversations

While aromantic, asexual, and aspec people can engage in actions normatively associated with attraction, our worth shouldn't be centered around it. All of our voices are worth hearing and respecting regardless of how we interact with intimacy and the language surrounding it

"Queerplatonic relationships? You mean just friends" Queerplatonic partnership isn't synonymous with friendship. Qprs are committed relationships on a foundation that isn't romantic or platonic, even if it has some elements that traditionally fit into those categories

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Aphobia is ingrained in our society because allonormativity places such heavy emphasis on sexual and romantic attraction, subsequently follwed by action, in relation to maturity and fulfillment as well as perpetuating them as inherent to the human experience, which isnt inclusive

Queerplatonic relationships are often rejected because they dismantle the hierarchical view of partnership that's presented by amatonormativity. The idea that romantic love is an inherent priority isn't inclusive to everyone's experience, and it's important to acknowledge that

Asexuality and aromanticism have an incredible amount of political value that deserves to be acknowledged. With the way that amatonormativity is woven throughout various social structures, our experiences provide much needed perspective surrounding the nuance of connection

"You dont need to come out as aroace no one would've known" We dont come out based on how convenient it is for people around us. Our experiences are real and dont just go away if we dont talk about them. The validity of our identities isnt centered around the approval of others

Friendly reminder not to ask intrusive questions about an asexual person's sex life just because they're ace. If you're trying to learn about how we navigate our relationships, there are appropriate ways to ask, but remember, we aren't obligated to share that personal information

"You wouldn't get kicked out of a restaurant for being aroace" Measuring our validity on the bigotry we experience is harmful because it dismisses the nuance in what discrimination can look like and creates a hierarchy within the community that hurts more than it helps

As an aroace person, I often forget that most other people experience romantic and sexual attraction to some degree and it always catches me off guard when I'm reminded

"You're aromantic? But what about love?" Love isn't just romantic, but also, the idea that falling in love determines someone's worth or happiness is incredibly othering, romantic, or otherwise. Being aromantic isn't a burden; we're whole, and our orientations are a part of that

The overall dismissal of predominantly asexual and aromantic experiences, as well how we chose to articulate them, shows how ingrained aphobia is in society. Erasure is discrimination and, passive or not, it carries a violent weight that deserves to be taken seriously

Aromantic, asexual, and aspec people aren't lacking anything; we're whole and our identities are a part of what makes us that way

"You're asexual? I feel sorry for your partners" Our identities aren't a burden or a sacrifice. Centering the quality of relationships around asexuality is incredibly othering. Partnerships with nuanced attraction can work, and sustaining that ace people aren't whole isn't okay