It really needs to rain soon because too much small talk in my life is being dedicated to the lack of rain and how dry it is outside

i really oughta stop scrolling and get back to work lmao

"nauseous" is such a god-awful word; saying it aloud is so nauseating 🤢

The fajitas, which I assume come out sizzlin

"I'm always here for you" -family member who is never there for you

today i will be reaping the "sounds like a monday problem" seeds i sowed on friday

The Will Stancil Show got cancelled today

saw some daffodils, hell yeah

Once again, it is Monday and I am fighting for my life out here

I'm looking at houses online and came across this lovely AI photo. My friends and I are currently arguing if that is a vase or a bong on the table lmao

Hearing and reading so much about oil over the past 2 weeks makes me appreciate how weird a word oil is

chrain -- chad train

WILL STANCIL IS #10 ON THE CHAD LEADERBOARD

are you fucking kidding me 🤦‍♂️

ate a king sized candy bar for lunch and washed it down with an iced coffee

"Clavicular was mid jestergooning when a group of Foids came and spiked his Cortisol lev-" You bolt awake. You're not online. It is November 8, 2016. You were not going to vote, but you have changed your mind. The future cannot come to pass. You must Pokemon Go to the polls.

CBS ending Colbert's show the day before Skibidi Biden Day (May 22) is DISGRACEFUL

I'm very disappointed to learn that ghost kitchens are kitchens exclusively for delivery/takeout orders and not kitchens where spooky phenomena occur

saw a moth today

Monday again... fighting for my life... 😰

first garden-fresh tomato of the season hell yeah

Monday motivation LORD KNOWS I NEED IT

Saw a guy wearing a cutoff hoodie today. Are you cold or hot?

A key personality trait of mine is not caring about anything particularly much.

The goal today was to be normal. Sorry folks, I failed. Will try again tomorrow.

🚨ATTENTION🚨: On this day 3 years ago I had an interview with a company, after which the HR person told me they'd call me back. I'm still waiting! I hope I get the job!

Only 72 days until fall but WHO'S COUNTING??

motivational quote of the day

🚨IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT🚨 🚨SKIBIDI BIDEN DAY🚨 On this day one (1) year ago, Stephen Colbert premiered SKIBIDI BIDEN, which has brought nothing but joy to me and many others. Please RT and share to join me in spreading awareness on this most historic day.