When Halimede speaks, I listen 🙏

did y'all hear they accidentally launched the artemis crew into the sun? they're all gone

Dude, they are MILKING you in the replies... You're becoming absolutely drained in the quotes... It's getting two handed with a double twist on the blogosphere

I feel like I would love all of Yorgos Lanthimos's movies if they weren't made by Yorgos Lanthimos

It fucks me up how Gerran Howell has that accent. I just hope he isn't Laurieing it up

NADU POSITION RAAAHHHHH

Fucked up that the guy that made spellbound caves and started race for wool has gone full chud

preferably all in the same deck #私を作ったマジック9枚 #My9MTGCards

Feeling really sad about how mf doom died....,,,,,,, detransitioning just to argue with guys who keep talking about drake v doom ngl

reading the 0.999... wikipedia talk page just to feel something

I get told Bud Light tastes like piss I import ten cases I drink one ... I am inconceivably disappointed

Using the wrong keyboard for a while is an advanced form of mind break

Unstucking and solving a puzzle during mystery hunt feels better than cumming

My wife is out of town so I can finally thirst over male celebrities and she can't beat me over it.... Bill Skarsgård looks so good in the trailer for Dead Man's Wire, I'm gonna go crazy

I started doing kegels while I'm dead on League and now when I piss it hits the ceiling

diy or die, except it's like, tote bags, or something

Name idea for a youtube channel about illegal driving tips: Red Means Go

I sentence you to.... one week no wife cuddles!

I sentence you to.... stepping out of warm shower on to ice cold stone floor!

my wife told me she would beat me if I lost playing league of legends, so now I'm queuing sona top

The porno I'm directing has scene that's a homage to the oldboy corridor scene, except instead of a bunch of guys in a corridor it's two girls in a bed

Gay northernlion be like "I love pussy"

Call me the Red Bull Baron Powerplay the way they've been milking me for years

SHE DID IT, LET'S FUCKING GOOOO

Watching my wife on her webcam and she refuses to hurt herself for my amusement, I can't believe how evil she is

Playing Soraka in soloqueue:

Ex-Leatherdyke reacts to t4t puppycule playdate: "That's what I woulda did, that's the technique"

Look at my angelically beautiful wife, I'm going to install a usb c port (no proprietary ports allowed in our household) in her neck while she sleeps. she won't know what hit her

My brain is estrogenized, so I can't post good anymore,,, but my bitch wife is making me post. She said if I don't get at least one good post out every day she was going to get me on a "milking horse", I don't know what that is but I'm scared 😢

When the opps have you blushing and crossing your legs

Nothing brightens up a thursday quite like rubbing the stray ice crystals from carton of ice cream on your nipples

Call me Hit Me Hard And Soft by Billie Eilish (1 Year Anniversary Edition Vinyl) the way girls cover me in red stuff

microdosing bluechew just to get through the day

Me when she takes off her shirt

Call me Khans of Tarkir standard UB tempo the way I'm having four Disdainful Strokes

Call me Los Ratones, the way I'm getting my ass beat

Need a wife who forgets her lunch so I can go to her work and give it to her and give her a little kiss on the cheek...

"Straight edge?" No, I basically only watch lesbia-...

Call me a 6 on the motoric response section of the Glascow coma scale the way I Obey Commands

You can't make a computer cum, but that won't stop me from trying

Pregaming a pregnancy test by pissing on a toothbrush

I must not scroll reels, scrolling reels is the attention killer

Me and who,,?

Me downloading grindr:

I will do unutterable things to whoever gifts me this skin

We're so back

Problematic knuckle crack volume difference

Transition timeline

drop and run tramp stamp