Sometimes, I have to just go with any energy spikes I get. Managed to clean my room a bit. But running out of energy now.

I am now cooking for three adults who can not aid themselves in that manner. Two get snap benefits, but they get about 20 dollars a month. To say I am getting creative AF is an understatement.

Been trying to do a rainbowish skeleton cardigan, but my neurospicy brain says not right now! Right now we fish, in a game. For hours. Wtf?

My mom got out of the hospital three days ago, and I was tasked by my siblings to feed her daily. So I have been. Today she complained because I have done "too good a job." I swear some people bitch about anything!

I am going to be that grandma with the cookie tin filled with buttons. I know this already.

So close to finishing the latest cardigan. But my right shoulder is so messed up I can barely move. This sucks.

Today, I am going to try to start learning to tank in game. I have dps and healed, but never tanked.

I have too many projects and not enough life span.

I miss decorum and professionalism.

One of the hardest things I have to deal with in this novel is that in the background is real life events that my characters can neither touch nor fix. They can merely react, think about, and survive it.

Actually, I had a breakthrough with a plot issue I have been having! That is one bug worked out. A thousand more to go.

War crimes. This whole administration has caused me to have to increase all my meds. Just to keep putting one foot in front of the other.

Made philly cheese steak egg rolls, cheese rangoons, and deviled eggs because I can.

I like the idea of holidays. I just hate actually engaging in the work.

Still working on the butterfly cardigan. Still iffy on the fit. But I have two different ideas on how to adjust it once it is done. So at least I have a plan.

Been having writer's block. Lots of reasons for it, really. So been crocheting in the meanwhile. Thinking of trying the butterfly cardigan, even with the reported issues. Meh. Yeah will give it a go.

Discord is being ridiculous. When my son was 13, he had facial hair and was often mistaken as a teacher or TA in the hallways of middle school! Likewise, there is an entire Reddit where people talk about being mistaken as too young. Meanwhile, let's make it easier to steal identities?

I have to go back to work tomorrow. So, I food prepped easy to eat and make food for husband, and two of our daughters are off work tomorrow and will hang out with him off and on. I still reminded him I will be within a few miles with phone on.

Husband is back from hospital. He is so sore.

Finished the youngest grandchildren blanket. Tomorrow I will start a sweater while I wait for husband to get through surgery.

My father in law is Silent Generation and pretty deaf. He is listening to Leave it to Beaver and YouTube AI videos on full blast and I am being over stimulated way too much.

Got my FIL's kidney function up to 54! I am thrilled!!!!!

I feel like I am going so slow on projects that I am traveling backwards in time.

Have food prepped for tomorrow. Not staying up tonight because I am old and get cranky past my bedtime and have to work tomorrow. But I will have a glass of mead, a cookie, and will crochet. Thinking Pestilence needs a larger part in my story.

In a one week period, I have made 26 containers of fudge in 7 flavors. I am also doing the lions share of the cooking and baking tomorrow. Tired.

I adore my pups, but damn I am sore cleaning up after their chaos.

Made fudge! Sending some with one daughter to another daughter and her wife in California! 7 is visiting 2 for Christmas! So it is easier to send with her. I have 8 kids. (5 step, 3 bio). So online instead of names will assign birth order to differentiate!

I am extra extra broke this Yule. I also ended up with the flu, which made crafting impossible lately. I always make gifts for Yule. So, making candy and cookies it is! I feel better but have no energy.

Best feeling for me today? My youngest grandson doing a literal happy dance to eat my cinnamon rolls!

One of my daughter in laws passed away last night. Just speechless.

So far, this last week: 1/3 done with blanket, made fudge, made sugar cookies, and completely managed to procrastinate on anything important!

Finally made progress. I hope to get it done in next couple of weeks. Yule/Christmas gift for 1 year old granddaughter! Mosaic blanket with bunnies!

I spent three hours frogging and re crocheting 4 rows because, of course, when I am trying to count, people need to ask me questions.

Keep jumping today from reading to game to crochet to movies. As a result, nothing accomplished! Doesn't help that the game is buggy.

I realized that two ways I tend to show affection are baking with yeast and crocheting with black yarn. Just took 4 hours to make my FIL cinnamon rolls.

Tomorrow, I can finally take off the saniderm. I am having a lot of trouble with artistic and literary motivation. This is a depressing time line.

Husband will have surgery after first of the year. Trying to figure out what costs to slim down to save money before then to save money. Realizing that not much to cut. In other brighter news, I am being gifted a tattoo redo!

Things are getting tight, as we suspected they would. It is triggering my ED. Food scarcity is a major trigger.

So, about half the basement is okay. Not great, but okay. But, I hurt my ribs and have to take it easy. So will crochet a bit. Hope to write soon downstairs!

Started working on the basement because I decided to make my workspace happen myself. I have a suspicion it will take a minimum of 3 weeks to do. And will eventually need to rent a dumpster to throw some stuff out.

I try not to post too much angsty whiny stuff on here. But I am struggling right now. My husband's prostate cancer is now intermediate level after only two years, and now treatment options need discussed. Add in the crap going on in our country and other issues, and I am so overly.

I can't take anymore bad news this week. Just can't.

I am so tired of everything. This ridiculous... everything.

Nearly done with the laundry bag I am making for one of my kids. Also, Hell House LLC marathon for meeeee!

He is so weird coming out of it. He has told me he was violated, mentioned aliens and probes, that he would like to river dance, and now he has passed gas on me. Gonna be an interesting day.

Husband is having another biopsy today. 3rd one. Since prostate cancer tends to move slowly, they take a wait and see approach at this stage. But any new lesions have to be tested.

Lemon bars made. Ingredients for supper purchased. Birthday dinner for 29 year old, planned. I feel so old. Sigh.

Had to call off work. My leg locked up and would not work. Hurtssss!

Carpal tunnel is acting up. But so close to finishing the huge bag for one of my daughters.

Baked Golden Bubble Rolls for FIL and my husband. He ate about 7 in one sitting. And he wonders why he gets heartburn?