If I had a nickel every time a season 3 episode of a crime drama diverged into a side adventure involving a murderous chase through snowy woods where the main character barely appears if at all, and also it was one of the best episodes of the show, I’d have two nickels (Sopranos and Fargo)

Media containing both Fred Melamed and Michael Stuhlbarg in which one of them is named “Sy”: - A Serious Man - Fargo season 3 I don’t know what this means but it feels important

Top 5 reasons RFK Jr always wears jeans: • leg tattoos detailing various Kennedy family crimes • lost legs to flesh eating bacteria & uses lifelike prosthetics • has a tail due to Kennedy inbreeding • Satyr legs due to witch’s curse • those are his legs, his diet makes them look like denim

I would love it if someone made a medical drama where all the cases are either explicitly or implicitly supernatural. And yes I say that knowing that’s basically the premise of Garth Marenghi’s Darkplace

Whoever said watching movies doesn’t require effort and hard work never had to watch Inland Empire (10/10, amazing movie though)

It’s very funny the way season 4 of Bridgerton suddenly shows all its rich people being insensitive/neglectful towards their servants after it took the show 4 seasons to remember poor people exist

My dumbest joke today: Q: what do you call an Olympic skater who’s also a second-wave feminist writer? A: Betty Freedance

Lovecraftian horror story but it’s just about an extremely offline person learning various internet esoterica and lore and slowly becoming More Online

I can’t prove it, but I have strong suspicions that noted film director Gore Verbinski secretly moonlights as noted fetish porn director Vore Gerbinski

Fandango this is going to sound like a joke but yes I actually am interested in the “people screaming at the sky in front of a red background” double feature this weekend

I’m finally watching Fargo (the show, don’t worry I’ve seen the movie), and my only complaint so far is that i simply don’t believe the Hanks genes could produce Joey King

Question for people who watched Supernatural as it was coming out: was it obvious to everyone at the time how much better an actor Jensen Ackles is compared to Jared Padalecki?

It’s kind of crazy that corporations have been monitoring all my internet usage for decades at this point and have recommended me a product I want to buy exactly zero times. Like what was this nightmarish panopticon all for?

My timeline is strongly implying that RFI Jr ate Scott Adams

Loot is a crazy show because it’ll have some amazing funny bits, some nice “all billionaires are evil” sentiments, and then fill a too-short season with cliched sitcom plots instead of anything relevant to wealth inequality, and have Melinda Gates on as a guest star

Well I’d deleted the app off my phone about a year ago, but with all the latest Grok stuff decided to get rid of my old Twitter account just in case.

I respect The Pitt season 2 for having a chill first episode but also casually throwing the Dumpster Man from Mulholland Drive at them to deal with. Next episode they should have to do surgery on the Eraserhead baby.

Romcom about a couple deciding if they want to have a threesome with Willem Dafoe, working title: Willem They or Wontem They

Things I’m learning from Heated Rivalry: - All hockey players are gay - Gay sex makes you better at hockey

Watching The Odyssey 7 months from now: “You’re telling me this Phemus is poly?”

Went insane realizing that Stranger Things could have, in previous seasons, killed off: - Murray - Mike - Lucas - Jonathan - Hopper - Joyce - Erica And aside from the surviving characters being sad (mostly, nobody cares about Murray), that would’ve had almost no impact on the plot of season 5

It’s kinda funny that we already have the perfect Martian flag design but Japan called dibs.

Is there a word/phrase for when you think a movie/show is flawed but also most of the criticisms people are making online are really stupid and you don’t want to be associated with them? It’s happening with Stranger Things now, but it’s far from the first time (see: most Star Wars shows)

I feel like I’ve unlocked the correct way to watch Netflix shows: on my phone at 1.25x speed (a format I would recommend for no other content except long YouTube video essays). This solves all complaints of them being too long, slow-paced, poorly-acted, etc

Sometimes I feel like I’m not that left-pilled but then I watch Captain Phillips for the first time and my reaction is “well that was well-made imperialist propaganda” (Don’t ask why my family was watching Captain Phillips on Christmas Eve instead of a Christmas movie)

The Odyssey is a really obvious project for Nolan in retrospect since it has all 3 of the biggest motifs from his movies: - Time is arguably the biggest antagonist - Man separated from his family due to his own mistakes or outside circumstances - Man will do Literally Anything for Anne Hathaway

Imagine wanting to be taken seriously but your name is Rob Riggle

Everyone pointing out that nobody in Marvel movies actually says “He’s right behind me, isn’t he?” If you’re wondering where that actually comes from, I have learned where by watching seasons 5 and 6 of Supernatural

“How do we make this horror project extra scary?” The otherwise-competent Andy Muschietti: “TEETH TEETH TEETH TEETH TEETH!”

Going to start using “You can’t give me anything because everything you have is stolen,” from Pluribus for all AI content now

The real lesson of both Donald Trump and Emperor Palpatine is that people will tolerate evil a lot more if it makes good memes. You know people in Star Wars would be sharing Palpatine memes the same way we share Trump memes, or the way we share Palpatine memes.

Sure Box Office Achievement is a stupid award, but at least the nominees are somehow even stupider

I feel like Apple by default became one of the least evil tech companies, which is sad when they’re still super evil.

I respect the writers of The Boys because if I had to come up with a 5th season worth of “what if superpowered things happened to a butt or penis?” I’d probably just kill myself

I feel like I should’ve realized with the hot air balloon episode that The Good Place was doing a Wizard of Oz (Jason needs a brain, Eleanor needs a heart, Chidi needs courage, & maybe a bit of a stretch but Tahani needs a home/sense of belonging. Also an all-powerful wizard isn’t what he seems)

People who have almost no similarities but I still mix their names up because they sound kinda similar: - Justin Trudeau and Justin Theroux - Jack O’Connell and Josh O’Connor (When I was much younger: Monica Bellucci and Monica Lewinsky)

Do you think the Deschanel sisters have ever watched Twin Peaks, or would it be too weird to watch your mom get harassed by Tony from West Side Story?

Why did this happen? I feel insane for noticing this

It’s fucked up that there’s a drug for cats but no drugs for dogs.

It’s crazy how Welcome to Derry keeps seeming like it’s going to be a good show and then every time something scary is supposed to happen it hits you with ugly CGI glop instead.

Rewatching Stranger Things and remembering the first couple seasons are actually pretty good.

I’ve seen a lot of movies that were successful this year, and a lot of movies that flopped, and I’ll be honest I have no idea what general audiences want to see anymore, because genre, tone, quality of film, advertising, none of these seem to be determining factors

Excited for the end of Stranger Things mainly so that we can get Winona Ryder out of 80’s nostalgia jail.

Fetish artist named Vore Gerbinski

I think any issues with the GDT Frankenstein movie come from the same place as the sentiment of “if you were a fan of Buck Rogers in the 70’s, you made Star Wars. If you were a fan of Star Wars in the 21st century, you made more Star Wars.”

Getting likes by responding to a more popular account feels like the social media equivalent of being a remora

Really funny to watch the new Frankenstein, feel like it wasn’t Del Toro’s best but still a fun time, then go on twitter and see everyone is calling it either amazing or terrible with no in between. Like damn yall have to be inflammatory about everything, no matter how lukewarm.

Frankenstein movie where the monster learns English from watching Keanu Reeves movies so he just talks like Keanu Reeves the whole time (can also be played by Keanu Reeves in heavy prosthetics)

You ever think about the incredible meme versatility Mr Incredible has had over his lifetime? Truly a generational talent

I think we should go back to having regular TVs instead of HD, maybe have one of each for different shows. HD can be for movies or certain prestige shows, but we don’t need sitcoms to be in HD; this is how we get back to 22-episode seasons, not caring about visual fidelity as much.