When you havin the best shower of your life but they invited Diddy

Microsoft developers when they cant protect the lives of millipns pf innoecent people

white people be like i made coleslaw

whan yah vape taste like gmail 😆🔫

iOS update lowkey made of car crash victims

hey

Someone im in a discord server with only sends screenshots using lasso select

when you low key forget to put the dryer sheet in the dryer

My personal version of sending another trillion to israel is adding another Thank You Scientist song to my playlist

some times i get bored and browse last fm

You know how the average person swallows one spider while they sleep im like that but with 100 bed bugs i solve my problems just by existing

30 days soundcloud only diet

this year im thinkful for money and water

1

posts with links seem to get super bombed from the algorithm hashtag bring back woke

youtu.be/Kj-HuwvaQIc enjoy

👁️

Someone could assemble a motion sensing gun to shoot your balls right outside your window and you wouldn’t Even Know it until its too late

Everyone where I go there is a rest room and im start ing to feel like social ism is the way to go

Set the planet too 500 degrees for 1 minute it will be really fun

My kitten was raised with corndogs and now she has a stick in her ass

goib

everybody chemicals

You make my everything do a plane

fuck ground haogs those fuckers naever see their fucking gshadow and it pisse sme off

200.66 200.66 200.66 200.66 200.66 200.66 200.66 200.66 200.66 200.66 200.66 200.66 200.66 200.66 200.66 200.66 200.66 200.66 200.66 200.66 200.66 200.66 200.66 200.66 200.66 200.66 200.66 200.66 200.66 200.66 200.66 200.66 200.66 200.66 200.66

Guy who jerks off with a lemon: are you a dry beater or a lotion beater or a lemon beater

💭💭💭. a pluperfect

a pluperfect

The only food app i got downloaded on my phone is Little Caesars

‘Premium Hydration’ and its jusy gigabytes and estrogen 💞

Just ate 7 honey buns

da news about the american penis man is crazy

😀

You Tube .com Brian Griffin being satisfyingly harmed for 7 minutes straight

My frappe that i left in the freezer for two days is having a hard time melting who wanna mail me a Torch

media that makes you pee media that turns you in to the ocean media that flows media that saturates you with a lovely hydration

im just a lonely stick of butter

Its saw your phone in half saturday! saw your phone in half

If you had a cubic meter of hitler would you piss on it

Every once in a while me and 𝓗abibi go on an adventure for nourishment last time I got kicked out of a gas station while trying to grab a donut because 𝓗abibi decided to walk out the store with a big pot without paying

bug (in sect)

Experiencing interruptions? I've never been interrupted in my entire life every second is an illusion of the last and a major portion of my brain is used on training AI also i've never slept a day in my life and im homeless and i have no more parents i ate all of them

Ever since they elected Mamdani my twitter timeline has morphed into a grotesque reflection of the mind I once yearned to grow and nourish

Taxis will be replaced with camels

And then I was like: wwwwwhhhhhaaaaattttt aaaaarrrrreeeee ttttthhhhhooooossssseeeee

letchup doesnt exist what are you putting on this 🌭 😂