BBC Sherlock has a lot to answer for

Remember to travel to your nearest big Tesco and experience the traditional festive argy-bargy. For best results, bring about 17 kids with you (Just borrow your neighbours) and see if you can create a trolley bottleneck that can't physically be resolved without removing the shelving units.

>inhales< ACTIVE AUTOREPLY!!!

For some reason everyone ends thinking the building on the right is the Bank of England. It’s just a fancy mall with a Fortnum & Mason and a Tiffany in. The one on the left is the bank.

The Scots are right, Jan 2nd should be a bank holiday.

Step 362: Ponder the LEGO Technic, Plate 1 x 5 with Smooth Ends, 4 Studs and Center Axle Hole, Blue

I'm worried I'm going to spend more of the break watch X-Files episodes than one ought to. It's a good worried though.

Assorted December sunrises

My one sentence horror story - "Oh, I only read non-fiction."

Didn’t they teach paragraphs at Quantico Scully?

France Review: Eiffel Tower 3/5 - Long wait for lifts. Chateau Versailles - 4/5 Biggest and fanciest place. Tourists there suck tho Trianon - 5/5 - Secret best bit Louvre 4/5 - Getting inside is terrible even with timed ticket Notre Dam 5/5 Sacré-Cœur - 2/5 - Area is full of aggressive scammers

First attempt at speaking to someone in France - Me: “Bonjour! Parlez-vous anglais?” Them: “What?”

<- helpfully carries someone's suitcase "You can use the roly wheels" "Honestly I prefer to just carry it." "But the wheels..." "I really find them annoying and it's not that heavy" "But you can just drag it with the wheels?" "I hate the wheels!" "JUST USE THE WHEELS" "I WOULD RATHER DIE"

In the ticket description write a list of the Functional and Non-Functional smoothies

Remember: Spring back, Fall forward

I'm pretty good at figuring out when people accidentally write 'not' meaning 'now' (Eg. "It's not working"), and other way around. It's basically a superpower.

As a reasonably Uncle-coded person, I aspire to live up to the definition from DHMIS

I'm doing some good harbinging today, so watch out for that

Local saying: A stopped clock is 25-minutes fast twice a day.

Lunchtime tree walk

Not sure star wars should have wicker

Old plan: Less anime New plan: More anime

Fun tip: Replace a few of your commonly used items with identical versions but in different colours. Enjoy the sense of unease that follows where you wonder if you've slipped into an alternate dimension. Ask your friends if they know how you can get back to the 'Blue backpack dimension'

Earlier this year I stayed somewhere with a close view of golf happening. I was struck by how little anyone seemed to be enjoying it. Just a bunch of people seemingly grumpy about how their golf is going.

Normal occurrences in Paternoster Square

Getting in your car after the garage guy drove it, and the seat is so low you can only really see the sky. He wasn't that tall!

NowTV: Your home for those blue/yellow type shows. (Also, we can’t decide which of them is our second most favourite)

Ooh, a 20 minute video on a disaster I've never heard of that sounds vaguely troubling. "To truly understand the Bicester Windmill Disaster of 1993, we have to go back to Lord Millington-Forthsythe Brown who was born in 1723 and invented the gyrating sprocket. But first we must go to 121 BC when..."

Every time I leave my flat, I walk down three identical staircases. Sometimes there are four flights, and sometimes just two. You may think it’s probably just related to my mental health at the time. But no, pretty sure it changes for real. Also my neighbours are demonic blob monsters.

No promises, grim portal.

"Maybe it'll come in the second post?" It never did

Reposting this from 2017 to upset a new platform

Meeting someone you know randomly on the tube always seems off. Oh so we just happened to be travelling at the exact same time and got on the same part of the same carriage of the same train? Yeah right. Bad writing coincidence bullshit. Went downhill after season 3.

The two moods: * Forgetting to turn over the calendar over for 3 months * Turning over the calendar a day early

Slapping the laptop shut at the end of a WFH Friday is profoundly elating. So many hopes and dreams for the weekend. I'm sure I'll get to everything

Assorted sky stuff today

To find the Notting Hill carnival map: 1) Find link on website to take you to 2) instagram story with link embedded in first image that takes you to 3) Another website with a link that takes you to 4) Google Drive Start your adventure here: nhcarnival.org/maps

Neighbours have put up their August lights

I have a new way of testing the current state of LLMs "Can you make a detailed ascii art depiction of bicycle?"

Finally time to watch Alien Caith

Evening report: Beat Donkey Kong Bananza Had a minor panic attack Dealt with another Grasshopper in the flat (Witches curse?) Tried to read a chapter of the pickwick papers, but was prevented by a Scintillating Scotoma

A very 2025 headline pair.

Oh Zebra! Zebraaaa! ZEEBRAAAAA!

I need this shirt

Smoke (The Apple TV show) "Fire is an organism' "Fire watches" "Fire waits..." "Fire solves puzzles" "Fire has human level intelligence" "Fire has an IQ of 130"

I like it when Google's AI overview tries to interpret input written like search terms rather than AI prompt, and just sort of makes up stuff. Then the thing you want is right below it.

Some specific advice just in case it ever comes up - You really don't need to take an arrow for Achilles. He's got this.

(The hangry grumblings of the lactose intolerant) Fucking brioche burger buns! I recently tried to get a burger place to use the bun from their vegan burger on the beef burger, but they got freaked out worrying about cross-contamination - so ended up ordering a steak.

Rapture over Yeading

Me: "Oh shit! Is <cool thing> about to happen!?" The Fantastic Four: First Steps: "Nope!"