Gandalf is a really bad traveling companion. Fucker keeps disappearing

I can't watch black and white TV or movies. Like where's all the colour. Why you been so cheap

Hahahahaha

Netflix bragging about Casablanca but not Scooby Doo. So out of touch

It's called The Nutcracker because those are poses no one who possesses balls should be able to do

You know when you find the bee you put into your penis over a week ago

Imagine getting Good Morning'd by Belladonna Tooks son

Lego Hobbit didn't need to be open world

Okay but Lego Doctor Who The Video Game when?

Gonna play Lego Hobbit and let you know all the fun things that happen

Theres always more lego

The code for my dos game is getting a bit much.. maybe I should've used C instead of assembly

Meta Fart Glasses, more like

Just discovered this niche indie game called Minecraft. Think it could be big one day

Give Jenny a gun imo

Antfifa

Terminator 2 was better than the original

Then Jesus said may he without rizz throw the first dab, no cap

I bet they don't even know about fight club

It'd just fuck my head if I was in the 90s again. I don't want to live that long

Legally speaking if I make a coffee within the next 5 minutes I'm allowed to drink it

This is what you get after beating 100 games of zombies in Black Ops

I'd have been a great bard or jester

I just won the IKEA Peace Prize

Once saw a live foot ball game at the stadium. Was world cup and everything. I don't like foot ball but it got me off the ward and I had a fancy pie

Bins are suspiciously empty.. I bet Starmer has been about

I swear that's the Yorkshire Tea box or something

constexpr auto and using makes wrapping C code in a C++ header really sexy like

Hugs are also Popular With Friends

I won the world cup twice

Femi? Hahahahaha

They should make a milkman simulator that's 18+

Porn studios should release audiobooks but call them audiofucks

That song Police Nabbed Me Dad ain't bad

He's called Shaggy because he fucks

Old programmers did stuff like putting numbers before their code because they don't know how a backspace works

A handie man

Desperate Housewives but it's on the Starship Enterprise

Hands can have jobs too if they want

Hear me out.. popcorn ice cream

Not many people know this but I've got some ice cream and it's your favourite kind

Why bills :(

Oi look it's Bilbo Bellins from Bellend!

Brain Cocks

Imagine being a pigeon. Ridiculous!

Nicolas Cage should replace that green frog guy in Muppets

Bruce Willis wouldn't even stand a chance

Toy story is 30 years old

Starfield was a masterpiece

Someone should invent a kind of chatbot that you can fuck! Hi, I'm Elon Musk and today..