who would've thought that dealing with my hometown's military draft office would be torture not because of transphobia but because of the crippling bureaucracy of it all

Coming on the 16th of July HOC EST CORPUS MEUM: An OYuuO Gothic Zine Obscured family ties, secret siblings, murder, incest, hauntings, patriarchy, repressed guilt, familial terror, descents into madness, corruption and imperiled virtue - all the good stuff :-)

literally why is 6 a.m. the cats' prime shitting time

but I'm really glad i decided to rewatch it as an adult with more analytical and critical skills, as well as the experience and knowledge i didn't have before. I'm getting so much more from it now than i did back then. for all its flaws, it's a great and complex story

it's like... watching a train wreck that is going to happen in a few minutes. that's the experience

man, season 5 of merlin is a certified upsetting watch

I might be wrong but I think merlin bbc pmo so bad that I started going to the gym and continued reading the capital at the same time to procrastinate watching it further 💀

also I saw someone say smth along the lines of "on a rewatch, the magic users aren't all as innocent as I remembered them to be" and it just pissed me off ngl, oh I'm sorry, is the oppressed minority attempting to fight for their lives? are the persecuted people getting radicalised?? fuck off

bruh merlin be thanking gaius for "teaching him everything good there is about magic" and it's just being a class traitor 💀

I know they do this joke (half of it) in the show, I don't care

look at my beautiful princess 😩😩

just finished the first season today, it's so interesting to see the parallels between merlin and uther. with all the daunting responsibility merlin carries at his young age, it could do him so good to learn from uther's best qualities; instead, he repeats his mistakes

the face of a man who's just questioned his son's servant's loyalty to him only to hear in response "you could say there's a bond between us"

all my homies hate uther pendragon (because he is a well fleshed out character that was written to represent exactly the kinds of things we should denounce in real life)

i remember staying up till 5-6 a.m. on weekdays, then waking up an hour later to go to college, taking my laptop with me to find an empty classroom and keep watching during free hours. tbh i WISH i wasn't 28 with a job now so i could do it again, im in bed and it's CALLING to me 💔

man i did NOT remember how excruciatingly bisexual everyone in merlin bbc was

im currently having a fever and trying to sleep but my brain just came up with "everyone and a french person" which i feel like is a banger, k bye gnight

unfortunately a single serving of grapes is however many grapes you bought, be safe out there

I haven't finished Hades 2 yet but did make some progress with the story, and now im having Thoughts™ about the core ideas on the first and the second games and how they're very similar but fundamentally different

unironically think that one of, if not the most, important bo burnham's song is "art is dead"

i have TWO sides. the left one has more beard on it and the right one... the right one has All The Acne

breaking news the thing that always happens happened again

I am yet to get to it but I feel like even a traditionalist fascist playthrough of DE will make me feel less yucky than the moralist centrist one.. the things I'll do for steam achievements 😔

precinct 41 theme has been stuck in my head for a couple days now, and not only does it have this gallop-ey feel to it, but also imitated sound of hooves. Jean did say he used to be an equestrian cop (or both of them?), and I love this decision for the track

being on a dating app is such a depressing experience. some of it is that every time, after some swiping, i start genuinely thinking that i just don't like people much. but also... nobody is dreaming of dating apps?? *I* don't dream of dating apps that's for sure

this isn't even funny, I'm checking the weather forecast for June and it has like, FOUR days without rain? out of the whole MONTH?? i better be seeing SO many mushrooms in autumn 😡

the longer i look at food being unable to choose the less i want to eat at all

oh okay see i WAS wondering why ive been hating myself this much lately, and i THINK it's bc we stopped taking vitamin D3? like a month and a half ago, and then the sun just never came... gonna start again and see if that helps at all

some days i be worried about not "doing enough" at work but then i remember that there's more to me as a person than my usefulness to an agent of capitalism based in its very cradle (a US fintech company) and suddenly everything is fine

I feel like saying "they must've been on something" about a work that is outstandingly creative 1) invalidates the love, effort, and labour that went into making it 2) contributes to an image of an artist as this leisurely creature 3) alienates the viewer from the act of creation altogether

I like to think that on one of the evenings, after wishing Harry a good night, Kim went up to the mirror in his room to have a serious talk with himself to not even *think* about falling for THAT (it didn't work)

the first achievement I got also happens to be the most important one 🥰

I'm clean at last 😩😩 fucking hell i really hope the hot water maintenance is NOT this week, or the next one for that matter

I'm so pissed, I'm still sick, the weather is shit and it's fucking freezing at home, and now we've not had hot water for two days. I genuinely feel like I will break something if I don't get to shower SOON

need to go to bed now so let's run a quick prayer circle to make sure i wake up tomorrow with my interest in the game intact

okay 1) the game is great, even if a little slow-paced, I'm really enjoying both the narration and visual styles, but more importantly 2) i will actually marry kim kitsuragi i have seen the light i get it now

okay imma do an experiment and try to play disco elysium today, which is what i was originally planning to do once i finished the fic but started another game instead bc of a recommendation. might be that it's just demand avoidance and i'll be able to actually enjoy something i had wanted to do

in other news, i got paid and finally bought some coffee, I really missed this part of my mornings

mannnnn feeling miserable

ah okay so all this time i was rereading my own fic and constantly thinking and talking about it and analysing it, all the while thinking wow this is so self-centred it's revolting, would you stop tooting your own horn, you're so vain and shallow — that was a hyperfixation. yeah...

dudeeeee i hate when my brain does this 🥲 wdym i can't even make myself play a videogame that i already started and found interesting? nooooo we gotta spend three days straight lying down in a chair, numb, mindlessly switching between apps bc APPARENTLY even entertaining myself is a chore now huh

I hate what we did to summers. I miss spending July at my grandma's house, eating raspberries off the bush in a garden that's full of butterflies of all kinds

no more fanfic to work on every day, so NOW i'm falling into that liminal headspace in-between obsessions 😎🤙

🎶i did it🎶 the third and final chapter of the fic i never thought i'd write! man what a ride archiveofourown.org/works/638807... #stobotnik #dbh

for someone who doesn't know jackshit about public speaking, i sure added a lot of it into the fic

me, forced to relive and take from experience as a participant and onlooker of massive protests in my country for a fic: huh, so that's why i was stalling!

I find it annoying that D:BH story presents remaining a machine for Connor as a moral failing. I think it really shows the discrepancy between what they were trying to say (racism bad) and how they chose to show it (through intentionally created AI machines)

happy birthday to me! as a birthday gift you can RP this post 💖

great news everybody, the thigh muscles ive gained by sitting at home doing nothing all day just allowed me to ride the bike for a few hours and im totally fine, thanks testosterone!!

this new boba place has some awesome cups!! i love it