Put a model shelf up in my stardew valley house which is foreshadowing the model shelf I'm putting up in the house I'm finally moving to in a month

how ur boss looks at you when you ask how that raise is coming along when he says "thank god" when u come back from a week off

Getting really into aperol spritzs

Can't stop thinking about the dispensary employee who asked my girlfriend and I if we were sisters

Hitting that spot juuust right with @estrogenicmutt.bsky.social Art by @millislushi on twitter

Made my first baguette today

he greets me like a dog now

blue mountain (Poem, May 2026) when i drove her to the greyhound, i said something about myself, and she looked down, then looked to me, and she said, "i think you would rise to the occasion"

hollywood doesnt even bother doing soulless reboots anymore all we know is digital upscale 35mm 4k remaster and davinci resolve contrast exposure slider

ive started putting peanuts in a tray out for the crow and he only ever takes one at a time his modesty humbles me

Flat chested girls make the world go round

fuck it chicago DSLR throwback

She loves eating cam sensors for an amazing reason

Tomorrow is #LeaveYourPhoneAtHomeMonday make sure you leave your phone at home tomorrow

i love birds so much dude

If my joke falls flat I just say "yuppp" after 5 seconds of silence it works every time

Bounce a girl on your bedsprings this spring to ensure offspring next spring

Worst head u will ever get is from a gynecologist

My first gift from the crow I befriended

Pissing urself feels so good when u ain’t got a bitch in ya ear telling u it’s nasty

Uhh woke is back I guess. Sorry guys this one didn't feel as good

hydrophobic? c'mon dude it's 2026

I'm always saying "I'm always saying this" even if I'm not saying it

Getting bit by one million mailbox spiders for 0% intro APR

spotted one of my dream birds today, the dipper. brought me to the edge of tears

Nobody wants to talk about the aftermarket rainbow LED Bluetooth head unit crisis

i think im her bro

all my referrals & prerequisites are in order for my SRS consultation in two months im so crazy hyped

i wanna go camping

All people do these days is think about FOX BODIES when they should be considering a FOXBODY

Submissive and impeachable

I have a very specific catholic guilt about calling out of work which is crazy cus im a second generation balkan

Gardening and feeling very gender

none of this is absolute and a better world is always possible

3 beers and lowballing everybody with a pool table in a 100 mile radius

for sale: i ♥️ my girlfriend t-shirt, never worn

If ants could cook they'd probably say stuff like ingredi-ants

My annoying ass roommates won't let me put the free tugboat stack in the yard

Why do they call it road rage if I'm having fun

Crowdsourced Panopticon

Getting a bill in the mail for 10$ is low-key insulting im pretty sure it cost more than that for you to get this here

middle aged woman that eats way too much tuna call that a mercury cougar

We used to go out with the kings for drafts now everybody's about the draftkings

Draw over of this would be so tuff

how it feels to drink beer

my roommate keeps calling my truck "gross" but he doesn't understand that it pulls like crazy

Explaining baseball to an American:

Rage baiting in the bathroom stall graffiti cus I'm bored

My favorite zoomer left for a new job 💔

the crow of good fortune. if u see this crow something good will happen to u today