the more i burn the further i go. the only things holding me back are my chemical contracts. without those i have the freedom of a spirit calling strangers names in the woods

last year when i was dreaming abt being cut open so i could birth myself into new life i didn't understand how much of my spiritual weavings needed to be cut off to feed the gestation of that new life. nevertheless it's all happening as i dreamed it. im never going to be the same

how it feels to teach someone how to drive in post-covid brain damage epidemic rage reflex 2026

lowkey it feels soooooo good to give up on all the hopes and beliefs i had for humanity. no more will i overextend to trust in the bare minimum. no more will i beg for mercy from ppl who were just luckier than me. you win, you made an individualist out of me, betrayal is the default. i absolve you

ive become a polarizing figure by being sick half to death and very very mentally desperately unwell but the more i give up on the better i am as process with eyes

rent's due very soon but i'm still $350 short. thank u so much to everyone who has shared + supported so far 🩷 pls spread this around if u can!! ko-fi.com/shantasma/go...

insane woman with insane woman hair

i asked the postrats for help and they ignored me in favor of discussing how to most favorably treat the algorithms grown in their desktop computers. and in spite of it all i'm still going there because i want to see the trees. dopesick and yearning for moss and fern and tide

is there anything with evil rat bastard nonbinary characters bc all the ones i can think of are more along the lines of heckin valid representation

someone living in philadelphia with poor analyses of the discourse call that a philly cheese take

lesbians with access to medchemexpress gimme gimme gimme i have so many things to try

this protracted breakdown is because i spent all of last year dying and in spite of trying everything i could to keep my hope and love alive i just watched as everyone in my life left bc i wasn't suffering gracefully enough. in spite of everything i survived and there's nothing left of me

luck is the only thing allowing you to live. virtue doesn't live on paper

disabled, losing my apartment, losing all my doctors, losing stable food whatever whatever whatever the point is that it doesn't matter and nobody cares and there are no guardrails and instead of finding pearls to clutch because i'm scared im going to walk right into the fire

ithink this is what elden ring is about

so far ive biohacked myself into nonexistent inflammation, normal energy levels (vast improvement) and the tummy ache to end them all. win some/lose some

snail. compatriot

every day i research my great and terrible project and if i spend longer than five minutes away from researching my great and terrible project im consumed with anxiety as the reality of how little control i have fills my lungs and keeps the air from me

*:

belief is fuel to burn

ilinx is rehabilitation and mobility . i have begged the ocean for sustenance and she only watched me starve . i will ask the mountains to turn the other way . i will take the bitterness of salt water and make it my own; say the waves: "you survived without my sustenance and now you are like me".

i will see the pacific and i will no longer be afraid

i'm part of it whether or not i feel like it and i'm starting to feel like i'm part of it whether or not you let me be. are you part of it? the feeling doesn't matter, are you really part of it?

i've had a terrible number of months

i'm disabled+trans and will be homeless in a matter of weeks. i'm trying to put together savings as i can but it's an uphill battle. help keep me fed and relocate to WA bc better homeless there than in AR. thank u ♡ СА: $perdifoil РР: @\valcierge VМ: @\perdifoil and my 🎶 in ☣️

excision and relapse/rebirth . short on compulsion . too full of compulsion . not enough of me left to be driven . you can't imagine the poison in me now . i miss you so much and you killed the last thing i was . my eyes are open again and nothing is behind them . i wish we could be friends again .

ive been taking a dementia med for two days and i'm already calling it the algernon pill

the out fit

rode my bike in a cleavage baring outfit and the voracious soyfacing of a pack of college students on scooters was thankfully immediately balanced by an entire construction crew who acted as if the sight of me was a gift from life herself. smiling warmly, contented, etc

thank you for playing ^-^

snowwwee yayaayy

direct to video sequel that leaves all previous agonies unsatisfactorily unaddressed

haven't been here in a while. i got a motorcycle

learning the prelude from angel's egg :3

six months later i'm a whole different bitch

the wrc should do away with profanity fines completely and replace them with fines for making your co driver cry

deci coded characters :3

just spent way too long coding this feed on my phone to aggregate rally racing posts ;-; bsky.app/profile/did:...

as a lesbian with aspirations of rally racing this image has changed me forever

i'm sorry for doing a laura palmer scream when you tickled me i'm just traumatized

If i saw a child doing heroin i would jump in front of the needle and take the Hit . That is how dedicated i am to community's

every day i wake up and think "i need to finish my artbook so i can release my album" and then it's time for bed and the agony of inaction is exponentially worse the next time i wake up here's today's result of throwing my hands up in despair when i ran out of distractions

beaked up beating egotistical boys at autocross

proud of my eyeliner :3

my setup has become even more severe,, soon i'll be able to enter the wired as if with my own body

video game music peaked in 2004 with the gran turismo 4 menu music and everything since then has been a simple recapitulation of the truths contained within

it's like you were born from a dream i had ages ago and have kept alive in my my heart ever since ✧⁠*⁠。 i promise i'll never wake up, i can dream for both of us ♡

album art done, scheduling the album to release in a couple weeks ♡

i am ending my relationship with yearning, developing crushes, forming attachments, and finding friend groups. whenever i am lonely i will listen to ambient music and ponder Phthalo Green