EVERYONE IS SO MEAN TO ME……

WHAT?! EXCUSE ME?! DO YOU REALLY KNOW SO LITTLE OF THE YIGA CLAN? TO CLAIM WE ARE ‘MORONS’.. MAKES.. //YOU// A MORON! HAH!

PSH. YOU’LL NEVER CATCH ME! MASTER KOHGA, OUT! (A huge puff of smoke outlined with the clans sigil rises from where he was once standing. He can be seen a couple meters away running away on foot.)

I AM BEING THREATENED???

THIS IS MY NORMAL TONE OF VOICE. WHY ARE YOU SPEAKING SO QUIETLY?

LIFE CAN BE SO BEAUTIFUL.

OH! WHY DIDNT YOU SAY SO! BUMPING YOUR HEAD PROBABLY MADE YOU FORGET!

MASTER KOHGA NEVER FAILS. BUT ONLY SOMETIMES WHEN IM KILLED. BUT DEATH IS ONLY TEMPORARY.

HE ONLY KICKED MY ASS ACTUALLY. BUT ONLY A LITTLE.

(Eats banana. Throws peel. Slips on own thrown peel.) WHOEVER PUT THAT THERE IS GETTING THROWN IN THE DUNGEON.

THIS IS JUST MY NATURAL TONE OF VOICE.

(Scratching back of head. Turns around. Does a spin. Looking cluelessly.) UHM. I DONT GET WHATS SO FUNNY. IS THERE SOMETHING WRONG WITH YOU.

CAN I //HELP// YOU.

DO YOU LIVE UNDER A ROCK?

..I AM SO SICK OF BEING THE BUTT OF THESE JOKES.

WHAT?

YIGA CLAN 4 EVER.

(Wearing an ‘I <3 bananas’ shirt. Don’t ask where he got it from.)

I THINK YOU ALL SHOULD JOIN THE YIGA CLAN. WE HAVE BANANAS. AND THE POWER OF THE DEMON LORD. AND EVEN MORE BANANAS.

(SITS down with a huff.)

//i kinda need kohga and a zant to be friends. i think it fits. or they’d cause a riot somehow

PSH… NONSENSE! I JUST CANT STAND SEEING SOMETHING SO TACKY.. UNLIKE MY GLORIOUS MASK HERE!

//apologies for the slow activity, just been sick irl and the holidays but im gonna pop on more soon! ^_^

(LOUD OBNOXIOUS YAWN.)

//oh master kohga is absolutely trying to usurp that throne. But in slapstick style. He probably wouldn’t get very far to be fair, he’d probably get somebody else to dispose of them and then pit the blame on them lmfao

HUH.. DID I REALLY PAUSE FOR THAT LONG? WAS THE ECHO OFF? … NO, NO MAYBE IM JUST IMAGINING THINGS! SURELY! NOTHING CAN FOOL MASTER KOHGA!

(And now, he’s pathetically running away. He ends up tripping mid run, and grunts.) ..OH WHAT AM I DOING, IM NOT RUNNING AWAY.. IM TELEPORTING AWAY! (POOF!)

..WHERE DID YOU GET THAT MASK?! NOBODY SHOULD BE WEARING THAT.. UHM.. GAUDY THING!

GOOOOOD MORN—…AFTERNOOON! TOTALLY DIDNT SLEEP ALL MORNING!

//ill get to replies soon! got a cold irl so ive been a little tired/resting but ill reply either later tonight or tomorrow morning!

HUH. USUALLY THERE ISN’T THAT MUCH OF AN ECHO HERE. MAINLY BECAUSE IT DOESN’T EVEN ECHO HERE. AND IM NOT EVEN TALKING THAT LOUD!

(Writes ‘DO NOT MESS WITH RITOS’ on his ‘Ways to make Lord Ganon happy without doing anything myself’. list.)

EVERY ONE IS SO MEAN TO ME. </3

HUH? (Turn. Turn. Looking up, looking down.) WHO SAID THAT? (Scratching head. How confusing.) ..MUST’VE BEEN THE WIND. AGAIN.

HAH! HAHAHA! YOU ACT LIKE THAT MEASLY LITTLE BOW WOULD DO ANYTHING TO SOMEBODY BLESSED BY THE DEMON LORD HIMSELF! (Hands behind back. Whistling as he turns.) BUT. UHM.. I ACTUALLY MUST BE GOING! YOU KNOW HOW IT IS. I AM A BUUUSY MAN.

THE WIND SURE IS NOISY TODAY. UNLIKE MYSELF.

HAVE YOU SEEN THE YIGA CLANS AWESOME HIDEOUT AND UNLIMITED POTENTIAL (AKA BANANAS)? THAT WOULD MAKE EVEN THE HERO OF HYRULE HIMSELF CRUMBLE.

IT FEELS SO GOOD TO BE LOVED.

YOU ARE THE FORTUNATE ONE HERE. HAD I DECIDED TO UNLEASH MY FULL POWER ON YOU WEAKLINGS I SURELY WOULD HAVE KILLED YOU TO DEATH. NOW TREMBLE IN MY PRESENCE!

HM? WHO SAID THAT? OH. IT MUST JUST BE THE WIND.

I THINK REVALI IS JEALOUS OF MY GLORY AND CHARM.

YOU ARE MAKING MASTER KOGHA SAD.

WHY ARE YOU ALL NOT BASKING IN MY GLORIOUS PRESENCE?

YOU’D BE WISE TO PUT. THOSE. BACK! UNLESS YOU WANT TO FACE THE WRATH OF— (Dramatic pose. Wobble.) MAAAASTER KOHGA! BUT I WILL BE MERCIFUL JUST THIS ONCE IF YOU RETURN THEM!

ANYWAYYYY IM GOING TO GO TO MY NAPPING SPOT. IF ANYONE DISTURBS ME, YOU OWE ME. BIIIG TIME.

CRAZY? YOU MEAN STRONG, SMART, AWESOME AND SCARY!

UHM.. ANYWAY, NOW GET ME SOME BANANAS!

MASTER KOHGA IS GONNA KILL YOU ALL… TO DEATH!! -parody account. just for fun! -new to #bskyrp , #mvrp , #blueskyrp