I GOT A STAPLER FOR CHRISTMAS

Everything is covered in wrapping paper. The computers, the desks… the walls, ceiling and floor. Even me! My co workers told me the higher ups are going to flip when they see this prank. We like to have fun here.

I found out what “the back” was. Can’t say I’m a fan. What month is it?

Apparently it wasn’t in the back.

Asked the transdimentional entity that gave me its number about the stapler. They said they’ll check the back. Not sure what that means.

Today I found some staples, which is cool. Still no stapler.

Updated the language, should be significantly better now. I made so many mistakes aaaaaaaa

What month is it.

I celebrated fourth of july by trying to escape the office. You’ll never guess how I will celebrate the fifth of July!

Upper management seems to be quieter than usual today. Usually its an excessive amount of thrashing tentacles behind a foggy door window, but its gone eerily silent. Sounds like less work for greg!

Apparently its “not recommended” to eat the ceiling tiles. Why not? They are right there, so if Im feeling a bit peckish, I can just take one on the go! Like a really large potato chip!

Well Ive recovered much faster than I thought I would! Back to office posting! I found a pencil sharpener so I can finally sharpen my pencils!

Something happened. Gonna be gone for a bit.

Whats a Rune thats Delta? And why is it happening tomorrow today?

Upper management says the office is due for a reshuffling. About time, too! This area was getting a little bland, and I miss having a stapler.

I’ve got my thumbs, but the otherworldly sounds are back! Can’t a guy catch a break?

Guess who has two thumbs and managed to open a door? This- hey wait- where’d my thumbs go?

Imagine if you will… a ghost! Ooh! Ah! That was scary! Let’s not do that again.

I am going to find whoever invented doors and really give them a piece of my mind.

Office update: theres a cat poster that just says “hang in there”. Uplifting. Hang in there! Greg believes in you!

Saw a frog today! Made my day. Person who named frogs was right. That really is a frog!

Good news! I’ve found a window! I know how to open those! Bad news, the window opens directly to a door. This has to be a prank from the higher ups.

Sorry about the disappearance, the power went out and me and the strange shadow creature that stays just outside my peripheral have decided to take turns sharing a crank that keeps a generator going.

Office update: this new section of the office has more pencils. Another win for Greg.

There’s just more office. Im not sure what I expected.

Spent the Valentines Day with a mysterious being beyond this plane of existence. They didn’t mind the spot on my shirt, as it was so far below their existence that it didn’t matter! Also I got their number! They can open doors too, so that’s a plus!

Oh goodness me! My fountain pen leaked through into my collared shirt and ruined it! How will I spend Valentines now?

Found a newspaper and I finally thought I could get a sense of what is happening outside this building. Unfortunately its one from the 1970’s. Still no sign of the stapler.

A strange dark ooze keeps dripping from the ceiling. Im thinking it’s probably oil or the dusty air vents. I’ll tape it up for now. Duct tape, life’s band aid.

Office update: Ive organized all of the files in a neat pile. Now I just need to staple- wait, awww. :(

The water cooler spoke to me in a language that I think is beyond my comprehension. Either they need to get that fixed or I need to get read up on my ancient cursed texts. If we aren't solving the problem, WATER we doing? Ha! Get it?

Office update: the stapler is gone.

I dont quite follow what LGBT is but if its a friendly workplace environment Im all in! Right of Trans! I think thats what they say.

Accidentally spilled some coffee on my shirt! Yeouch! Clean up on aisle me!

I've watched this video multiple times. I still don't understand how they do it.

Office update: there's one more pencil than usual today. I've never seen or heard anyone enter or exit the office, so that's odd, but I like to look at the bright side. One more pencil for Greg!

Saw a roach in the office today. Eeyyikes!

Greg From Accounting