gonna ride this high for a while

i was testing our new benefits enrollment form in front of my team and when i added a spouse as a dependent i picked female as the gender

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feeling very this today

i slept for 12 hours last night and now everyone is doodlebob

the spreadsheet numbers aren’t doing what they’re supposed to

bandit STUNS in new favorite hang out spot

and if i said i redownloaded temple run

apparently the queen brenda song was staying at the same hotel as me when i was in vegas (i have no idea if it was at the same time but i just saw she posted a picture from the elevator lobby and said she was in vegas recently)

i didn’t HAVE to hold my cat down while they did his blood pressure test and took his urine sample, i GOT to hold my cat down while they did his blood pressure test and took his urine sample

i was casually watching the new game grumps episode while eating dinner when suddenly i heard a name i haven’t heard in ages

can’t believe tomorrow is monday AGAIN this bitch just doesn’t know when to give up

i just heard myself say “if that makes sense” on a call after perfectly explaining myself

genuinely how i feel on every call with my boss bc she won’t stop interrupting me to ask questions about what i’m trying to explain

i don’t wanna file quarterly reports i wanna go home and work on my knitting

does anyone know if we’re still allowed to have FUN even tho joe isn’t here

womp womp

a queen recognizing a queen

y’all my dad JUST heard about linkin park

nobody did any of the things i asked them to while i was away last week

uh oh no weather today chat, she’s unavailable

a root beer would HIT right now

thinking about the twilight new moon puzzle ball my parents got me for christmas in middle school that i can’t believe we threw out

HOME AT LAST

another great pic from the cat sitter, bandit yelling at her and embarrassing me as usual

if you’re advertising “great gluten free options!” and it’s fruit, i should be allowed to kick you in the shins

update: i’m at a burlesque show 😳

who could’ve predicted this: i, an introverted homebody, don’t really like las vegas!! shocking, i know

i’m playing a game in my head - how many men wearing jeans and a sport coat can i find. i started 5 minutes ago and already found 12

the guy at the big presentation today had labubus under his blazer and i thought of y’all

i just walked through and hype tunnel to that k-pop demon hunters song and it felt like a humiliation ritual

the pet sitter just sent me this picture of bandit, why is he serving body

conference update: this hotel is nicer than any where i’ve ever been and i feel like kevin from home alone 2

the first tik tok i see while riding the metro to the airport is a compilation of cats greeting their owners when they come home

i can’t even explain to him why i’m leaving or that i’ll be coming back!! this baby angel needs to know!!!!

this trip to vegas will be the longest i’ve been away from my cat since i fully adopted him over 4 years ago and i’m gonna miss him so much how do people do this 😭😭😭

game grumps finally playing until dawn 🙂‍↕️

vinyl shipping boxes in the package room i know what you are

my knitting needle set got delivered today so i can finally relearn how to knit!! my trip to vegas next week is about to be insane 🤪

me having a great day listening to the new album by my favorite artist while everyone else seems to be having a crap attack

she said “i protect the family” my my FIRST THOUGHT was “i protect the familitchi” 💀

y’all aoty i fear

ready for whatever the life of a showgirl album drop brings

i get to see one of my best friends this weekend who is visiting from joe’s hometown London

i’ve actually been so productive at work today bc i have no choice but to get everything done so i can fully slack off tomorrow while streaming the new album over and over again

today is the day 😀 ❤️‍🔥

apologies to my apartment complex package room for what’s about to happen this weekend

sorry boss i have to go home early i was annoyed with my cat this morning and i need to go apologize

me: hi [older coworker]! how are you? coworker: you’re losing weight

age yourself with a film you saw in the cinema as a kid: i’m sure i saw other movies in theaters before this but i vividly remember seeing ratatouille in theaters bc i went with my grandma and she would. not. shut. up.