i feel noticeably less bad after the most marginal bit of room-cleaning and self-care— maybe they do know what they're talking about

fucking snake #DigitalArt

an old piece i painted while i was going through a particular bout of melancholy

i don't understand people who can't see the world materially when the system's results are so real and present compared to any belief system. why is it so hard to believe that most of the hardships in the world are carefully engineered by very real dickwads and not magical fucking karma?

a little big orb doodle i did the other day

it’s live‼️‼️ i’ve been planning this revamp to the site for months at this point, and i think i’ve actually pulled it off the past 2+ weeks. try to find the little easter eggs i’ve planted throughout! ^^

soon bald bientôt snel

hey y’all, i’ve been busy— here’s what i have to show for it so far

i missed doing vectors, so i doodled this thing

hey gang, i’ve just realized i haven’t said anything in about a week. the only new thing to report is that i turned 19 some 2 days ago. nothing otherwise but slowly turning into a vegetable </3

found out what that fancy new animated brushes app is

ah, a moonless sea! #digitalart

say hi to my little mascot that i haven’t touched in years

it was a whirlwind of news the past day on the one hand, silksong and deltarune ch.3&4 became real alongside new fromsoft ip, and on the other, we over here just got slapped by the US with the highest tariffs on that list bonkers, i tell ya

hallo iedereen, have some doodles; i was toying with some cotton paper i got the other day— it feels reeally nice to paint on

a corpse should be left well alone

stream of consciousness doodles (my consciousness is 73% bloodborne)

i don't get why only other people get to be happy— it's just not fair... what kind of egregious sin did i commit in a previous life to suffer behind a one-way window looking out unto other people's smiles?

ohmyGOD i finally beat ebrietas!!!!!!! worst boss in the game— i swear my heart almost burst out of my chest when i saw the "prey slaughtered" text

when i die, i want to be completely forgotten. i want my accounts wiped, govt records erased, and memories forgotten. i want my body to be tossed into the woods, and when i'm reduced to bones, i want to be ground into a powder and vaporised. i want it to be as if i was never born.

quick mae #art #digitalart #nightinthewoods

#art #digitalart

i think i should wipe my internet presence and start over, there’s too much weight on this name for me and whenever i come across an old friend’s activity, i feel absolutely horrible about the sheer length of time since the last conversation i’ve had with them

i’m losing my mind juuust a little bit 🤏

learning hangul rn just to sing a korean kids song

finally conquered the beast that is tlou2 on grounded mode, which leaves only permadeath TwT

yay it's the new year! :D oh god it's the new year D:

every time i remember how stuck i am here in this place, a wave of debilitating despair engulfs my mind and body

and in your darkest moments, you find yourself— yet again— succumbing to your worst desires #art #digitalart

i get a little depressed seeing the draaastic drop in engagement since i stopped doing the very abstract, faux-neo-y2k, very digital, computer-y collage pieces, but i should be grateful i still get any love at all since resurfacing without a word and hard-pivoting out of necessity w/o explanation

stirbstirbstirb #art #digitalart

captive of _

captive of _

i love spiraling </3

i think literally— as in the dictionary definition of literal— everyone i still am in communication with is in a relationship

dabbling in dutch again is so weiiird after spending so much time with german lol

kinda wanna stream again or try getting into youtube again just so i can interact with people i have no idea what to talk about tho— i’m not nearly nerdy enough about anything to write video essays, or have compositions long enough to satisfy the algorithm

holy crêpes au chocolat i just found out that i can actually delete my deadname icloud email address ( ´ ▽ ` )

ich glaube ich werde irre .-.

a little test 👁️

been having a hard time breathing, felt woozy all day. but it's like 1am, i can't wake my parents up and they'd probably be angry about the hospital bills urgh— i might not wake up T-T

i might post a slightly suggestive quick painting i made sometime later. i hope no one thinks i’m pivoting my target audience lmao

it's a little nice not having an audience anymore because i get to scream bloody pain on here without bothering anyone

i feel like i’ve just let all the friendships i’ve made over the past few years rot and wither away into amnesic nullity

i’m slowly becoming an old grump who hates seeing other people happy

i'm going a little kooky in the ol' noggin

scrolling again is reminding me of why i stopped in the first place: the fomo and envy are so depressing T-T i’m running out of things to distract myself from everything, though … ugh maybe escapism isn’t sustainable—

people are awful, but i'm so lonely ugh my heart is gonna disintegrate