Well, a belated Happy Murder Your Benefactors Day, and a joyous Consumerist Feeding Frenzy Day to all who celebrate.

"You'll be visited by three spirits." The three spirits:

Post your favorite "Lord of the Rings" character... wrong answers only.

Cause of death? *slow drag on cigarette* Tainted Love (whoa-oh-ohhh...)

Cause of death? *Slow drag on a cigarette* My Vagina

This cloth smells of death, Charlie Brown!

The boat can leave now, Charlie Brown! Tell the crew.

Who will survive, and what will be left of them, Charlie Brown?

You must find the perfect *nasum*, Charlie Braun

Me as a Bluesky therapist: (I get *a lot* of use out of this image...)

These two are still up to their nonsense. They're both very gentle, even when play-fighting, but Smol Small Kitten is so crazy he's starting to wear Big Small Kitten out. It's a good thing she loves him so much, tho...

Udo Kier is dead?! Oh, man, I feel like life just fucked me in the gall bladder.

Without downloading new pics, what is it like dating you?

🎶 LADY EAT MY STINKY PINKY ROOTY DOOTY DOO LATELY WHEN I SEE YOU BABY DON'T KNOW WHAT I DO 'CAUSE I SAY NO... 🎶

"This might seem old-fashioned to some of you, but I'd like to join in on this song. It's the kind of a sentimental song that you get at the end of a movie. It's the kind of a song that people might sing to lеt all of you in the audience know that wе really like you, we care about you..."

Say, Trump's voice is getting rough. With the outbreak of hand, foot, and mouth disease in Maryland, some journalist should ask him if he's ever had Coxsackie, especially in his mouth. 🤔 hash tag Bubba

If you see this, share a Western vid or GIF 🖤 m.youtube.com/watch?v=jg7L...

Drop someone REDHEADED 👩‍🦰🖤👨‍🦰

How I greet people coming from the bad place outage:

Me, running away from my problems...

How I look reading your posts

There are 4 types of guys online. No exceptions.

There are 4 types of guys online. No exceptions.

Your last saved meme is your moral philosophy.

Say, I'm feelin' mighty chipper toda--🚫[BANNED!!]🚫

Some of y'all are clearly not surfing enough buttho-- wait, I didn't think this one through...

I think the only thing I found unexpected and slightly shocking in the Epstein emails is the fact that our Oligarch Overlords are apparently dumber than a tennis ball sandwich.

Goon a movie: Cat Women of the Goon

You're at Cash. I need you at Tango.

OK, timeline cleanse. You need to see the new best friends. It's only been 4 days and they are inseparable. ("I chomp u." "No I chomp *u*!" >CHOMP!< 😻)

Repost with an iconic fictional band: (OK, it's a real band *playing* hell's own orchestra, but still...)

Now what was that old song about conjuring Yog Sothoth? Oh, yeah: "Summon-Chanted Evening"...

What movie villain is a horrible "person" but an absolute joy to watch on screen? Absolutely any role played by...

What's that?! Elon is being roasted for his total lack of competence with pop culture references?! I have a song for that!!! This gives me the shameless opportunity to repost THE BALLAD OF THE BLADE RUNNER

I have to admit, I am a little bit impressed by the Democrats' skill at kicking the ball into their own goal... WHILE PLAYING PINOCHLE.

I'm perfectly willing to believe that the Democrats are playing 3-dimensional chess with this decision. Because it's just as easy to capitulate and give up on a game of 3D chess as it is anything else.

Welcome to Target

This is now one of my favorite photos of the Guys. You can see the wheels turning: "Hmm, to bite or not to bite?" To his credit, he decided to leave her outstretched toes alone, which for a kitten takes a remarkable amount of self-control.

"Employees must smile if less than 10 feet from a customer"

"Mmm, smelly toes, yum! NOM!" Kittens are fun.

OK, so we did *this* today, which is probably a terrible decision. But... HE'S JUST SO CUTE! 😻 Once again, we get a wee one to keep the youngest cat company, and the sweet, friendly cat who's already here says, "Ohhhhh, no, nope nope nope! Hiss, hiss." So we'll see how this goes.

Quote with your cute spider bois! I'm not sure why I ever did something *this stupid*... but here's a wobbly close-up video of an adorable jumping spider, accompanied by something that sounds suspiciously like (but is not) an old superhero cartoon theme. ARACHNO-DUDE!

We want no Kings in America... but we have an Earl of Sandwich! A Count of Monte Cristo! All hail the Dom of Subs: Reuben Hood!

Is Zohran making this free too? This kind of thing usually costs extra. Wow, rich Republican men will be moving *into* Mamdani's NYC if he socializes leather doms.

Ultimately I suspect it was the Dershowitz endorsement that pushed Mamdani over into victory...

Say, did one of the candidates have a Prince Albert? I've been trying to find election coverage, and all I keep hearing is something about "dick chainy"... 🤔

I put the "ew!" in New Jersey. (But I am not alone... 🤪)

Cuomo has been such an embarrassment that New York is considered changing his name back to Andrew Tappan Zee.

Those mourning Dick Cheney's death can take comfort in the fact that the Republicans have kept his memory alive by ensuring all their subsequent Vice Presidents have been, and probably always will be, Dicks.