I'm been roped into doing an "Opps All Nosferatu" holiday gift exchange in my warren and I need to think of some clever gift ideas

When I know that a Venture representative is coming to the Warren on business I like to put on old Dracula movies in the background, and then my broodmates and I try to get each other to crack up while they're talking to my Sire about Important Business

The Nos in my city have NOT run hundreds of miles of cable underground from warren to warren to make an intranet to speed along the dissemination of information in defiance of the Camarilla's no tech rule because that would be naughty

Yeah I mean if all the rumors are true about their origins, the Tremere aren't technically a real clan. That being said, I wouldn't say that in polite company or anything. You ever see a Tremere enforcer? Me either and that's why I'm still around in my little cozy sewer to shit post on the internet

Rats. Ratssssss! Thousands, MILLIONS of them! And they all like to chew on the server wireing. How they expected me to keep this shit working deep in the heart of a sewer is beyond me, it's like they set me up to fail or something. Ratssssss

Must be nice to live in LA and if yer obfuscate ever fails you can be all like "We're just filming a movie lol special effects makeup," and the kine will buy it. Not to give away my location, but where I'm at let's just say that shit wouldn't fly at all.

Every time I'm feeling grateful that I don't have to participate in mortal politics The Seneschal will summon me with like three other random kindred with severe emotional issues and it's like, "The Prince's Herald is missing go find them", and it always ends up being a conspiracy of some sort.

Ya know what's kinda weird? Poop. Every now and then I see a turd float by in the sewer I live in and I'm like, "I used to make those?" Gross.

I understand why so many Kindred keep ghouls around. With a mug like mine sometimes you need somebody with a normal looking face to do business for you. But henchman? Never saw the appeal. Imo the best henchman is the sort of person who doesn't actually know that they're a henchman

Ugh do this, hack that, eat that guy over there. Even amongst the dead I still feel like I'm working for The Man

I've decided to adopt a cat and not eat it. It gets lonely in this server room and yeah, I might look hideous but I was human once too. Got a Malkavian friend bringing it over later. I hope it's one of them hairless ones those are cuuuute

Apparently last weekend a buncha kine went to the Anarch Free States, dressed up like us and partied? This raggedy hoodie I'm wearing to help conceal my grotesque visage ain't a costume- it's a way of life!

My broodmate in the warren keeps complaining about how loud my mechanical keyboard is, but I just love the clicky clacky sound my claws make on it. Besides, I've been dead for a decade longer than them and I've got seniority

It's transgender day of visibility! The nosferatu posting this is agenger, which means I don't identify as any gender at all. I would be more visible, but I'm sort of a walking masquerade breach and besides, I put a lot of hard work into being this sneaky

Rats actually make for surprisingly good pets! If you can keep your broodmates from eating all the little guys that is

Nosferatu. Hideous monsters that lurk in the shadows. Watching. Waiting for just a right moment...to STRIKE! Or in my case, being forced to break into a fancy dress store late in the evening to find something to wear cause my sire is forcing me to go to this months Elysium 🤮. I LIKE my rags!

*psst* rumor mill is that things aren't looking so well for the Camerila in the big apple. If anyone on the inside can get me info on Prince Panhard's "dietary restriction" I've got a mint IBM 5150 with your name on it

The WORST rule The Cam brought down after the second inquisition happened was the no phones thing. Like seriously? Not having a phone in 2025? Yeah good luck with your carrier pigeons gramps. If our ELDERS would just bother to learn a little OPSEC we wouldn't have this problem.

On this day, Feburary 14th 1931, Dracula was released in theaters. Was is better than the 1922 Nosferatu? Ha, no of course not. I will admit that Bela Lugosi fella did a good job though. I could have sworn I once saw him wandering around LA in the early 90's but naaaaw

Happy Valentine's Day to ya my fellow licks!🦇