Why does time exist?

“Locking up” and “locking down” can mean the exact same thing

Almost every person in the world is the world record holder of something oddly specific

Coffee makes you hyper, but coffee shops are designed for people to chill, whereas alcohol is a depressant but bars and clubs are designed for people to be energetic

In 40 years, the majority of grandparents will likely play video games

There is nothing better than realizing, right after you wake up, that you won't have to face the consequences of the terrible choices you made in your dream

Inheritance is just your family member’s dropped loot

Would you rather be 50% correct 100% of the time, or entirely correct 50% of the time?

My biggest flex is being able to open and close school bus windows

Concrete and glass are both made mostly from sand, which makes skyscrapers hella tall sandcastles

Running from the cops is the ultimate double or nothing

Gummy worms have more bones in them than real worms

If time is so valuable, why is my time only worth $9.50/hr?

Living people eat dead mushrooms, while living mushrooms eat dead people