Love to post on the app where no one exists

How are you guys finding this??

I am going to become morning gym guy. If I don’t reply to this post proving I was at the gym before work everyone is allowed to throw broken glass at me

Bye bye car

Thought I was getting sick but I think I just drank too much strawberry soy milk

New BCNR is good. I can smile once again

Benched for the first time in two months and my shoulder is STILL fucked??? This is so stupid.

About to go to the gym for the first time in two months, this is gonna feel so bad I might cry

I may never drink again. I value being able to drive home at any time and sleep in my own bed far too much. Why have I trapped myself in this prison

Watching Crash (the worst movie ever made) and knowing these lines are written by this guy is blowing my mind

I think I’m finally permanently banned on Twitter for telling Elon to kill himself

Alright I’m back from Japan and I’m gonna hit the gym so hard I’ll be the hottest I’ve ever been

Have been on vacation for two weeks and am convinced I have lost every ounce of size and strength, need to go psycho mode in the gym the moment I get home

Jay walked in Japan and they spanked my ass raw in the town square

Being mildly drunk on the subway in Japan is torture. Everyone is so quiet and I want to both whip and nae nae right now.

Tomorrow is my last day of work and then I leave for Japan for three weeks. I’m gonna come back wearing the most fucked up pants you’ve ever seen

😎

Being a whore

I really wish Pinegrove didn’t have a terrible band name because they’re actually just incredible

Do I really need a job? I’d love to not have one

Have to work tomorrow

Being single and also not on any dating apps means I really gotta dig deep for the motivation to clean my apartment

Posted a bunch of random crud I have sitting around my apartment and made $1500. I’m gonna buy a Ferrari

I love stupid game for idiot

Can’t wait to get home and shave my moustache and then immediately realize it was a mistake and I look worse

Oh great I gotta stop at the grocery store on the way home from work, will the torture ever end???

I love my little routine of getting home from work and thinking “I would rather die than go to the gym” and then I go to the gym anyway

Coca-Cola making an AI commercial is the ultimate betrayal. What the fuck am I supposed to drink now?? Water??

Me being an obnoxious bitch

Okay I got banned on Twitter forever for telling Dennis Prager to kill himself.

No one exists on here I am gonna start posting like an absolute slut to an audience of zero

Should I download hinge again or kill myself?

Got banned from Twitter for telling the dude from Disturbed to kill himself. Dumb ass site

I love coming in here to be reminded only Dril and Haus of Decline post. Kinda nice.

I’m soooo glad I deleted Twitter haha it rocks here!!! So many funny jokes to read

Since Twitter only shows me white power shit now I’m just gonna post on here instead and pretend people exist here

If you are excited about AI you should kill yourself

Get in bitch

Riddled with guilt when I don’t rest enough and my little guys are tired in Pokémon Sleep.

Saw Porco Rosso for the first time and I want to smoke cigarettes in a jumpsuit soooooo bad.