Particle Census https://xkcd.com/3247/ Remember, your answers to the physics census are confidential; we will not be issuing Pauli exclusion principle citations. Explain xkcd: https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/3247

Speedrun https://xkcd.com/3246/ Usain Bolt holds the world record in the 100 meter speedrun. Explain xkcd: https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/3246

Results Age https://xkcd.com/3245/ Please, we need your help. Our research suggests you're the last living descendant of the person who knew how to format this config file. Explain xkcd: https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/3245

Pullback Drive https://xkcd.com/3244/ "How does the spring not run out almost immediately?" "We pull it back REALLY far." Explain xkcd: https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/3244

Crystal Gazing https://xkcd.com/3243/ (alt-text too long for a BlueSky message, see image alt-text instead) Explain xkcd: https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/3243

Aperiodic Table https://xkcd.com/3242/ Scientists occasionally invent alternative periodic table layouts, which is usually a sign that they don't have enough enrichment in their enclosures. Explain xkcd: https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/3242

Horizontal Stabilizers https://xkcd.com/3241/ It started as a mistake that everyone was afraid to admit to, and then it stuck because removing it 'looks silly.'. Explain xkcd: https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/3241

Bottle https://xkcd.com/3240/ "I know it seems impossible, but the trick is that I sailed in here when I was very young." Explain xkcd: https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/3240

Simple Machines https://xkcd.com/3239/ It's hard to decide which simple machine system to invest in. DeWalt makes a great lever and inclined plane, but I hear Milwaukee's wheel-and-axles are really good. Explain xkcd: https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/3239

Soniferous Aether https://xkcd.com/3238/ Imagine you could ride alongside a sound wave. It would probably be pretty cool, right? We're putting in a departmental budget request to buy a really fast plane so we can check it out. Explain xkcd: https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/3238

Husband and Wife https://xkcd.com/3237/ Borat came out twenty years ago this year--closer to the breakup of the Soviet Union than to today--but it honestly feels like it's been even longer, somehow. Explain xkcd: https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/3237

Border Message https://xkcd.com/3236/ Thanks to differences in logging regulations, the messages actually turned out to be visible from the air. Explain xkcd: https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/3236

Types of Board Game https://xkcd.com/3235/ I can't believe Candles of Vienna caved to commercial pressure and added the Goku expansion. Explain xkcd: https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/3235

Europa Missions https://xkcd.com/3234/ Before resurfacing, they promise to inspect the ice for any evidence of hockey-playing life. Explain xkcd: https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/3234

Make It Myself https://xkcd.com/3233/ It's not as big a loss as it looks, because now I have have leftover supplies, which will help me talk myself into doing this all over again with a new project! Explain xkcd: https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/3233

Countdown Standard https://xkcd.com/3232/ Anyone who is caught counting 'three ... two ... one ... zero ... GO!' will be punished with a lifetime of eating only ISO standard food samples. Explain xkcd: https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/3232

Lightning https://xkcd.com/3231/ Maybe you should wear one too? I guess I'm taller than you, so as long as I have one we're fine. Explain xkcd: https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/3231

Overton https://xkcd.com/3230/ I think I accidentally installed an Overton window in my bedroom. A few months ago, the sun wasn't in my face in the morning, but now it is. Explain xkcd: https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/3230

Grammar https://xkcd.com/3229/ Communication is one of the most popular ways to transmit information, ahead of rivals such as Explain xkcd: https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/3229

Day Counter https://xkcd.com/3228/ It has been −2,147,483,648 days since our last integer overflow. Explain xkcd: https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/3228

Creation https://xkcd.com/3227/ This xkcd.com update introduces a variety of new reading modes which can be activated through the menu. Explain xkcd: https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/3227

Home Solar https://xkcd.com/3226/ (alt-text too long for a BlueSky message, see image alt-text instead) Explain xkcd: https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/3226

Satellite Pollution https://xkcd.com/3225/ We're working to make sure the images are as up-to-date and accurate as possible, with a minimum number of sponsored galaxies. Explain xkcd: https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/3225

Centimeter Wavelengths https://xkcd.com/3224/ Yes, the cosmic microwave background is great, but what about the earthly microwave foreground? Explain xkcd: https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/3224

Inflation Timeline https://xkcd.com/3223/ Depending what corners of the internet you hang out on, 'regular' may at times awkwardly coexist with 'sexy.' Explain xkcd: https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/3223

Star Formation https://xkcd.com/3222/ It's ok, I still have some nice, cool gas clouds that aren't collapsing. As long as nothing ionizes them, I can continue to enjoy their ... HEY! NO!!! Explain xkcd: https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/3222

Landscape Features https://xkcd.com/3221/ 'Well, there's speculation that it's due to a mantle hotspot.' --a geologist who's trying to cover up the fact that they didn't hear your question Explain xkcd: https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/3221

Rotational Gravity https://xkcd.com/3220/ I don't get it. The peak acceleration for passengers was WAY lower than in the giant-waterslide-loop-the-loop incident the other cruise line fired me for. Explain xkcd: https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/3220

Planets and Bright Stars https://xkcd.com/3219/ (alt-text too long for a BlueSky message, see image alt-text instead) Explain xkcd: https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/3219

Subduction Retrieval https://xkcd.com/3218/ Aww, the oceanic crust and the continental crust are getting married! Explain xkcd: https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/3218

Home Remedies https://xkcd.com/3217/ As always, you are permitted to call one person for guidance, but that person must be a grandparent. Explain xkcd: https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/3217

Bazookasaurus https://xkcd.com/3216/ In contrast to the deep booming sound associated with the cannon in pop culture depictions, recent studies show it actually made more of a 'toot toot!' noise. Explain xkcd: https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/3216

Solar Warning https://xkcd.com/3215/ This replaces the previous solar activity watch, which was issued last month when the sun took off its sunglasses. Explain xkcd: https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/3215

Electric Vehicles https://xkcd.com/3214/ Now that I've finally gotten an electric vehicle, I'm never going back to an acoustic one. Explain xkcd: https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/3214

Dental Formulas https://xkcd.com/3213/ I mean, half of these are undefined. And your multiplication dots are too low; they look like decimal points. Explain xkcd: https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/3213

Little Red Dots https://xkcd.com/3212/ After a lot of analysis, I've determined that they're actually big red dots; they're just very far away. Explain xkcd: https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/3212

Amperage https://xkcd.com/3211/ Oh, and do you have any tips on how to vacuum up copper that's melted into your carpet? Explain xkcd: https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/3211

Eliminating the Impossible https://xkcd.com/3210/ 'If you've eliminated a few possibilities and you can't think of any others, your weird theory is proven right' isn't quite as rhetorically compelling. Explain xkcd: https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/3210

Plums https://xkcd.com/3209/ My icebox plum trap easily captured William Carlos Williams. It took much less work than the infinite looping network of diverging paths I had to build in that yellow wood to ensnare Robert Frost. Explain xkcd: https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/3209

SNEWS https://xkcd.com/3208/ People say setting of fireworks indoors is dangerous, but I looked at their energy release and it's like 10^-40 foe; totally negligible. Explain xkcd: https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/3208

Bad Map Projection: Zero Declination https://xkcd.com/3207/ (alt-text too long for a BlueSky message, see image alt-text instead) Explain xkcd: https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/3207

Installation https://xkcd.com/3206/ Do YOU remember the skylight being this big? Explain xkcd: https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/3206

Carbon Dating https://xkcd.com/3205/ This dating is corroborated by the presence of stone tools at the site, rather than earlier and less effective helium ones. Explain xkcd: https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/3205

Dinosaurs And Non-Dinosaurs https://xkcd.com/3204/ Staplers are actually in Pseudosuchia, making them more closely related to crocodiles than to dinosaurs. Explain xkcd: https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/3204

Binary Star https://xkcd.com/3203/ The discovery of a fully typographical star system comes with a big asterisk. Explain xkcd: https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/3203

Groundhog Day Meaning https://xkcd.com/3202/ Originally, the ceremony used a variety of rodents and mustelids, but over time most people agreed it made sense to standardize on a specific individual ground squirrel in Pennsylvania. Explain xkcd: https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/3202

Proof Without Content https://xkcd.com/3201/ There's also a proof without content of a conjecture without content, but it's left as an exercise for the reader. Explain xkcd: https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/3201

Chemical Formula https://xkcd.com/3200/ Some of the atoms in the molecule are very weakly bound. Explain xkcd: https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/3200

Early Arthropods https://xkcd.com/3199/ (alt-text too long for a BlueSky message, see image alt-text instead) Explain xkcd: https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/3199

Double-Pronged Extension Cord https://xkcd.com/3198/ 'Oh, and can I borrow 50 sacks of loose flour, a pile of lithium-ion batteries, a bucket of bleach, and a bucket of vinega--' 'NO!!!!!!' Explain xkcd: https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/3198