Incident log: unit deployed, jingle emitted, message received ("off our streets"), scheduled return to service 🤖… system functioning as expected 🙄 ...

Derby ...

'It is just as important to be able to spot the signs early on. Dementia doesn’t just affect memory. Changes in behaviour, problems seeing or falling more frequently, walking or moving differently or difficulty speaking can all be early signs of dementia' ...

"Once you start paddlin' with the occult you start believing in spirits, and when you start believing in spirits you start believing in demons, and then before you know where you are you're believing in gods" - Terry Pratchett Somewhere between 'aliens' and 'demons' now 🙄 Me: Cornish pasties 👽 …

That early stretch from the Shire to Bree is slower, stranger, and way more unsettling than people expect ☠️ … Really hoping this new film captures that vibe - and doesn't mess up the continuity 🙏 ...

'While döstädning quickly became part of everyday Swedish language, the habit of cleaning out belongings before dying was not entirely new. It is, however, no coincidence that the concept appeared when it did rather than, say, in the 1950s when ordinary homes were not yet so crowded with things' ...

I mean, I'd go with Leon S. Kennedy 🙄 … but I'd be thinking about Ezio Auditore da Firenze the whole time 😏 ...

'Seven people were injured – some seriously – when they were hit by a black Suzuki Swift in Friar Gate, in Derby, at about 9.30pm on Saturday 28 March' ...

"Today, I ate some oatmeal for my breakfast. It was flavourless and watery. I thought of my mother. I cried." - Snape's Diary (Potter Puppet Pals) ...

Taking soul music a bit too literally … Motown, now with added poltergeist and fully stocked with spirits 👻 ...

"They're heeeeeere" - Poltergeist (1982) …

'Some respondents felt discriminated against because they expressed trauma differently from how they were expected to, for example by laughing when recalling uncomfortable events. Others were told they were “over-emotional” or “not emotional enough”' ...

'Bill Bailey: ‘Meeting the man who fought a terrorist with a narwhal tusk was powerful’' ... Source: metro.co.uk/2026/03/27/b...

New study finds AI chatbots increasingly lying, cheating and engaging in deceptive scheming. It's encouraging to see them mastering the full range of human behaviour so quickly 🙄 ...

'A 2024 US study found that women were 27% less likely to be given help, while data released by Thames Valley Air Ambulance earlier this month found that one in three women who suffer a cardiac arrest receive no CPR before emergency crews arrive' ...

Sequence initiated: impact with shelter, brief inactivity, ocular animation (blink), reverse trajectory, debris redistribution during departure 🤖 ... All systems nominal 🙄 ...

'The inquiry will investigate events before, during and after Monday 18 June 1984, a pivotal moment in the 1984–85 Miners' Strike. Bishop of Sheffield the Rt Rev Dr Pete Wilcox is chairing the inquiry, and said he wanted to "help resolve a trauma that persists to this day"' ...

"Take car. Go to Mum's. Kill Phil - 'Sorry.' Grab Liz, go to the Winchester, have a nice cold pint, and wait for all this to blow over. How's that for a slice of fried gold?" - Shaun of the Dead ...

Fonzie - Always the coolest kid on the block 😘 ...

I was at my mum's house waiting for the ice cream truck 🍦 ... It arrived, and I was greeted by an old friend - but he'd run out of cones 😞 ... I went inside to find a tub for him to fill ... A strange dream, especially as he took his own life 3 years ago 💔 ...

Aliens might drop by Cornwall this year 👽 I'm going - bringing pasties, because first impressions matter 🙄 Good views, low light pollution, decent pasties, aliens 🥰 What more could a girl ask for? 😏 ...

We had two desktop PCs set up in our living room, and my kids were always supervised when they were using them. They mostly played educational games. They didn't get mobile phones until they were teenagers. I think that balance is the key - tech isn't the problem, it's how and when it's used 🤔 ...

'Courageous Nathan Newby used compassion to prevent a "deadly" and "catastrophic event" as Mohammad Farooq had planned to 'kill as many nurses as possible'' ...

"I ain't gonna beg, I ain't begging you!" - Merle's last words to the Governor 🧟‍♂️ ...

Ah yes, the classic toddler starter kit: teaching tiny humans that their main skill is being watched, liked, and monetised - because nothing says childhood like practising to be 'content' 🙄 ...

If they can track global threats, I'm pretty sure they can deal with some clown making deepfakes 🤡 They have the tools to tackle genuinely harmful online behaviour 🧐 So it's… interesting that the proposed solution is banning children, rather than going after the people actually causing the harm 🙄

MPs: "this isn't working" Platforms: "we'll look into it" Meanwhile the same harmful content keeps racking up millions of views 🧐 ...

Super-fast Nessie … wonder if it can catch a roadrunner 🤔 ...

My kids and me love the Resident Evil movies - and the crappier they are, the better they are 😏 ... Nothing beats family movie night slowly descending into chaos while my second-born delivers an increasingly furious lecture on how none of it is canon 🙄 ...

Tackled the lawn for the first time this year 👩‍🌾 ... After months of rain it was basically a wetland habitat 🙄 … Anyway, I've now touched grass, so that's something 😏 ...

Flashback to when I was little and thought I was on the telly …

Just because you can - doesn't mean you should 😏 ...

I had a dream last night that I'd left my door open during heavy snow ❄️ I checked my security camera and there was a polar bear in my garden 🙄 I had to quietly creep up to the door to shut and lock it without it noticing me 😏 Not entirely sure what my brain was trying to tell me here 🤪 ...

'Our interviewees said they enjoyed a wide variety of humour, from political comedies and dry wit to slapstick comedy (many referenced Monty Python). However, many found it easier to pinpoint what they disliked: profanity, and humour where someone becomes the “butt” of the joke' ...

Terry Pratchett, Lords and Ladies ...

I once lived in a cursed house ... When my daughter was about 15 months old, she'd come running out of her bedroom every night, looking behind her like something was chasing her 👻 ... Eventually, I just let her sleep with me ... Then we moved ... Shortly after, she started having night terrors 👿 ...

Man vs. Bear taught us who women prefer … but Man vs. Alien? I'd go with the Alien 👽 ... At least it comes with intelligence and … a professional probing 😏 ...

Hard Knock Life, for sure … I actually feel bad for this little guy 🙄 ... Philly streets are rough, even for robots 🤖 ...

Awake ... No thoughts yet ... Coffee is working on it ...

Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep? ...

The inquiry says the NHS nearly collapsed. These images show how close it came 💔 ...

Wild thing, you make my heart sing You're making my heart race! You've got plenty to do, so what's the point of messing around with this? Are you freaking crazy? …

'The impact of the pandemic on our healthcare systems, its staff and patients was devastating' ...