Buy all the traffic cones in the world. Destroy them. 26th Feb 2018 | 🔁 5 🩶 9 [url]

Life is too short for a bad porcelain goose. 26th Feb 2018 | 🔁 21 🩶 55 [url]

Throw potatoes around like confetti. 26th Feb 2018 | 🔁 4 🩶 14 [url]

You are only one decision away from a different beard. 25th Feb 2018 | 🔁 28 🩶 48 [url]

Draw a treacle tart in the clouds. Make it rain. 25th Feb 2018 | 🔁 3 🩶 11 [url]

Walk all over Luton holding a pork pie 25th Feb 2018 | 🔁 13 🩶 15 [url]

Use any media, including DeviantArt, to spread scorpions. 25th Feb 2018 | 🔁 3 🩶 7 [url]

Think about the ground. Imagine Boba Fett thinking about it too. 24th Feb 2018 | 🔁 9 🩶 19 [url]

Imagine you're a whale owned by Geri Halliwell. What's your name? 24th Feb 2018 | 🔁 16 🩶 37 [url]

Touch an electric toothbrush with your bare feet. Let the energy feed you. 23rd Feb 2018 | 🔁 3 🩶 12 [url]

Bottle the smell of Gregg Wallace and leave it for the postman to collect. 23rd Feb 2018 | 🔁 20 🩶 23 [url]

Bottle the smell of Boutros Boutros-Ghali and leave it for the postman to collect. 23rd Feb 2018 | 🔁 4 🩶 8 [url]

Don't compare your life to Jimmy Krankie's. 23rd Feb 2018 | 🔁 3 🩶 7 [url]

What is the most important thing in life? Pie and mashes'. 22nd Feb 2018 | 🔁 0 🩶 10 [url]

Don't forget how beautiful honk if you're horny bumper stickers can be. 21st Feb 2018 | 🔁 1 🩶 12 [url]

Pick a star in the sky. Name it MC Hammer. 21st Feb 2018 | 🔁 6 🩶 6 [url]

There are no bad salt and vinegar disco crisps. 20th Feb 2018 | 🔁 14 🩶 53 [url]

The cheese grater is a concept made by men. 20th Feb 2018 | 🔁 2 🩶 9 [url]

Grin because you're breathing and you feel joy when you shout the word "sausage roll" 20th Feb 2018 | 🔁 3 🩶 15 [url]

Be the teaspoon you want to be. 19th Feb 2018 | 🔁 6 🩶 6 [url]

It's cruet awareness hour. Please consider cruets for the next 60 minutes. 19th Feb 2018 | 🔁 4 🩶 10 [url]

Repeat this mantra until calm: Desk Lamps. Desk Lamps. Desk Lamps. Desk Lamps. Desk Lamps. Desk Lamps. Desk Lamps. Desk Lamps. Desk Lamps. Desk Lamps. Desk Lamps. Desk Lamps. Desk Lamps. Desk Lamps. Desk Lamps. Desk Lamps. Desk Lamps. 19th Feb 2018 | 🔁 4 🩶 11 [url]

It's Kevin Keegan awareness hour. Please be aware of Kevin Keegan for the next 60 minutes. 18th Feb 2018 | 🔁 39 🩶 88 [url]

Spend 21 seconds not thinking about broken eggs. Exhale. 18th Feb 2018 | 🔁 4 🩶 8 [url]

Shout for joy because you're breathing and you feel a spark of joy when you say the word "off-peak return to wigan central" 18th Feb 2018 | 🔁 5 🩶 5 [url]

Life is too short for a bad bic pen. 18th Feb 2018 | 🔁 1 🩶 9 [url]

It's rs232 adapter awareness hour. Please contemplate rs232 adapters for the next 60 minutes. 18th Feb 2018 | 🔁 38 🩶 52 [url]

Self care starts with treating yourself to a bag of dust. 18th Feb 2018 | 🔁 5 🩶 9 [url]

I love all toilets. Toilets are inspirational if you consider them carefully. 18th Feb 2018 | 🔁 4 🩶 10 [url]

Every pub deserves to be called art. 17th Feb 2018 | 🔁 4 🩶 9 [url]

If you love pies, set them free. 17th Feb 2018 | 🔁 21 🩶 50 [url]

Imagine 26 watermelons at the same time. Dance to the sound they make. 17th Feb 2018 | 🔁 5 🩶 10 [url]

By using your ability to empathise with hammers, you can lessen feelings of depression. 17th Feb 2018 | 🔁 3 🩶 11 [url]

Self care starts with rewarding yourself with an owl. 17th Feb 2018 | 🔁 37 🩶 69 [url]

It's shoelace awareness hour. Please consider shoelaces for the next 60 minutes. 16th Feb 2018 | 🔁 20 🩶 45 [url]

The atoms in a chimpanzee were once atoms in something else. Be their friend. 16th Feb 2018 | 🔁 3 🩶 15 [url]

Every black pudding deserves to be called art. 15th Feb 2018 | 🔁 8 🩶 12 [url]

1. Mumble "bunny" to yourself. 2. Repeat until not sad. 15th Feb 2018 | 🔁 5 🩶 11 [url]

Make a list of your favourite improvised explosive devices. Post it to someone who feels angry. 14th Feb 2018 | 🔁 16 🩶 30 [url]

If a hedgehog could talk, it would say "yes". 14th Feb 2018 | 🔁 3 🩶 9 [url]

Everyone has a Hank Williams in their imagination. Let him out. 13th Feb 2018 | 🔁 2 🩶 8 [url]

Imagine 7 billion pigs. Imagine they're all owned by Ken Dodd. 13th Feb 2018 | 🔁 3 🩶 8 [url]

Don't compare your life to Lionel Richie's. 13th Feb 2018 | 🔁 20 🩶 59 [url]

You don't need you be Sylvester McCoy. You need to be you. 13th Feb 2018 | 🔁 3 🩶 7 [url]

Repeat this mantra until calm: Bangers And Mashes. Bangers And Mashes. Bangers And Mashes. Bangers And Mashes. Bangers And Mashes. Bangers And Mashes. Bangers And Mashes. Bangers And Mashes. Bangers And Mashes. Bangers And Mashes. Bangers And Mashes. Bangers And… 13th Feb 2018 | 🔁 15 🩶 38 [url]

Self care starts with treating yourself to a celtic tattoo. 12th Feb 2018 | 🔁 1 🩶 10 [url]

Don't forget to express your love to manhole covers every day. 12th Feb 2018 | 🔁 2 🩶 9 [url]

When did you first notice that thermostats were beautiful? 12th Feb 2018 | 🔁 3 🩶 8 [url]

Imagine there's no torrent downloads. 11th Feb 2018 | 🔁 3 🩶 16 [url]

Record the sound of a computer game character ageing. 11th Feb 2018 | 🔁 3 🩶 7 [url]