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The Art of the Kneel.

BREAKING: All the worst people you know support the worst candidates available.

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I must admit, sometimes I do envy MAGA. Can you imagine how happy you’d be if you were actually into this shit?

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BREAKING: Cruise ship linked to hantavirus outbreak arrives in Canary Islands but don’t worry because RFK Jr. will be providing raccoon dick supplements at minimal cost to all eligible Americans.

HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY, @jessicarauvoice.bsky.social! You inspire, uplift, and educate Montana and me every single day. We’re so blessed to be on this journey with you. XOXO

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BREAKING: Virginia Supreme Court decides Virginia voters don’t matter.

If your vote didn’t matter they wouldn’t be trying so hard to keep you from using it.

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But seriously, Steve Hilton, Chad Bianco, and Spencer Pratt, are you lost? Do you think you’re in fucking FLORIDA? This is CALIFORNIA and here we don’t buy any of that dumbass shit you’re selling. So SIT THE FUCK DOWN AND SHUT THE FUCK UP you mediocre ass motherfuckers.

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BRAND NEW DRAMA REEL with fresh footage from MATLOCK and HIGH POTENTIAL! Need a wise judge, sad dad, vengeful alien clone, sadistic Chinese spy, helpful plastic surgeon, or a tough loving Wall Street investment banker? I HAVE RANGE. Now HIRE ME. youtu.be/7h3LgEQvC6w?...

It’s 2026 and I’m absolutely DONE with mediocre white men failing upward. Fuck Steve Hilton, Chad Bianco, and Spencer Fucking Pratt for even DREAMING they could hold an elected office in CALIFORNIA. Fuck off forever, shitty white dudes. You’re going the way of the dinosaur.

BREAKING: Ted Turner dying before Rupert Murdoch only further proof we’re living in worst timeline.

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A billion dollar ballroom. A billion of our tax dollars. Seriously, if voted for this, voted third party, or sat the fuck out, get fucked for all of eternity.

Is he dead yet?

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BREAKING: Rudy Giuliani in “critical condition” but reportedly receiving very best medical care at Johns Hopkins Flooring and Drywall.

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Honestly, you can’t expect people who don’t know the difference between “your” and “you’re” to know what “86” means anyway.

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Seems to me that at this point in history we have a truly inordinate amount of assholes worldwide but I can’t help but feel a little bad for anyone vying for the top spot. Wanna be the biggest asshole? Come on. That’d be like trying to hoop while Michael Jordan was in his prime.

BREAKING: American travelers worry Donald Trump’s picture in their passport may prevent them from entering certain countries or getting within 500 feet of schools, parks, and playgrounds.

EIGHTY-SIX FORTY-SEVEN AND RELEASE THE EPSTEIN FILES.

BREAKING: People spending 25 billion of your taxpayer dollars on war with Iran nobody wanted would also like more of your money for their ballroom.

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Must win game one won. #LetsGoOilers

Always so proud of @jessicarauvoice.bsky.social and all the amazing women of VOX Femina Los Angeles, LA’s premier women’s chorus. In a time when the arts and activism are under attack it’s inspiring and uplifting to see that, once again, WOMEN are leading the charge to FIGHT BACK.

BREAKING: Republicans only support free speech, voting rights, and prosecuting pedophiles when it benefits them.

BREAKING: People screaming “KILL ALL PEDOPHILES” suddenly extremely upset when someone actually tries to do that.

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Only in Donald Trump’s America would a comedian get fired for making jokes about a president but a president would get reelected for being a rapist, a convict, a pedophile, a murderer, a liar, a racist, a traitor, and a fraud.

Beginning to wonder if maybe you get to a certain age and you’re just never 100% anymore? Is that the case? Or is that just what being a parent means?

WERE YOU REFERRING TO ME?!?

Imagine being such a pedophile that whenever anyone even mentions the word you think they’re talking about you. Imagine being Donald Trump. But I repeat myself.

BREAKING: “I’m not a rapist. I’m not a pedophile,” says rapist and pedophile.

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Every school district in America, especially Uvalde, Sandy Hook, and Columbine, should now be demanding federal funds to build ballrooms for their students.

BREAKING: White House Labor Secretary declares Donald Trump directly responsible for massive 600% increase in job creation for burgeoning staged presidential assassination industry.