Ok Google.. thank you for the lovely bouquet.

Today is my Adderall skip day (which I try to do once/week, as per instructed by my psychologist, to prevent needing a dosage increase) and ooooof. I feel soooo unhinged and in need of dopamine and stimulation. Can someone come give me a brain massage and an IV of caffeine?

Have we talked about the “Ours” connection to the Delicate mv? “Elevator buttons and morning air Strangers' silence makes me want to take the stairs If you were here, we'd laugh about their vacant stares But right now my time is theirs”

Was also thinking about how this mashup lines up well with Emily Dickinson’s poem, “I felt a Funeral, in my Brain.”

I was thinking about the Cassandra x Mad Woman x IDSB mashup.. and then looked down at the “none of it was accidental” sweatshirt I was wearing.. and realized that line (like many) has double meaning. Men in power often feign ignorance, pretending they don’t know what they’re doing.. silencing

💁🏻‍♀️

Happy New Year’s Day! (My cover of NYD) www.tiktok.com/t/ZP8ysjsER/

2026: just me and my baby (dog). All I want is to experience peace in quiet moments.

Me yesterday: tonight I’m gonna get in bed by midnight so I can wake up by 9am and get stuff done! *gets in bed at 3am* Me today: *still not ready to start my day and haven’t even taken my morning adderall yet* Breaks from routine are hard. I enjoy them and need them… but also need a schedule.

You might be asexual if you thought “attraction” was like when you look at a pretty painting and it makes you feel a deep sense of appreciation for its beauty in your soul OR when you enjoy being around someone cuz you feel happy with them. And that’s it. No desire beyond enjoyment of presence.

You might be asexual if anytime someone mentions attraction, specifically sexual attraction, your first instinct is to ask them to describe what that is like to see if you’ve actually ever experienced it 😆

From my perspective, and also shaped by the wording of things, it was very clear that Tayvis was just part of the show. On the final episode it sai, “On Aug. 26 they ANNOUNCED their engagement.” Not, “on this day they got engaged” the emphasis was very clearly on the *announcement* of it.

Did some tarot for Winter solstice today & this piece of writing was included for my tarot card in the lil guide & I wanted to share this with anyone who might need it/want it/would love to claim it. As you should!

Where I’m coming from: I don’t want to position myself as “better” than other people just because I believe they are misunderstanding something. And I’ve realized that is where I have landed with “mainstream swifties,” and I don’t like that about myself. It’s not who I want to be or see myself as.

Controversial take: people are enjoying buying into the Tayvis love story and we need to accept that. It doesn’t actually affect us or invalidate us. People have their own truths from their own experiences. Their beliefs differing from yours/ours doesn’t earn your/our energy. Let them eat cake.

soooo the cassandra x mad woman x IDSB performance 11/22/24 (also TN timeline start day) was 55 (🖐️🖐️) weeks exactly before the mysterious new IDSB (& delicate) lyrics popped up on 12/12/25 😅 and jan just posted this an hour ago. nbd probably, right?

And a lesbian salute to you as well 🫡 (The Final Show “The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived” performance)

Omg

😆 I’m so easily identifiable as a millennial with the amount of gifs I use One of my classmates said they loved our “intergenerational friendship” 🤣… apparently others in the class thought I was in my late twenties (not a bad thing) and I was like.. “oh, I’m closer to 40 than 30.”

Side note on playing dress-up: I was explaining my gender identity to my co-teachers the other day, and was like, “anytime I’m dressed traditionally femme, it’s a casual drag performance. One that I really enjoy, because I love dressing femme, but it *always* feels like playing dress-up.”

Watching The Final Show - I love how well it features everyone involved - the shot of the person at the sound board during Fearless was adorable! Taylor really seems like an impossible person to genuinely dislike. I’m distrusting of anyone who disagrees, lol. Not her music - her as a person.

I’m watching a predictable, cheesy Christmas movie about a bakery… and now I want cookies. 🍪 And that summarizes my holiday goals - eating cookies like a happy muppet.

I removed the download for I Did Something Bad (on Apple Music) then redownloaded it - now it plays the “bitch” version.

When she said spelling is fun she meant spell casting obviously.

The “tree of life” in Mabel’s (Selena’s character) room in season 1 of Only Murders in the Building (2021). When she was going through her “depressing years” her mom recommend she read about the tree of life, so she said instead she made one.. look familiar?? Tissue paper flowers and vines..

Decided to increase the goal to $10,000 to plan ahead - I see clinical trials in my future and it seems they’ll have the same 80/20 patient responsibility as this radiology one does. gofund.me/5db247136

Hey friends, I didn’t expect to have a financial need so soon into this, but I’m going to owe a substantial amount of money for the upcoming radiation treatment and I just don’t have it. Can you take a look and donate if you can, and share my post if you can’t? It would mean the world to me. 💖💖💖

Daily reminder to be gay. Also, not all yellow and lavender color combos represent closeting.

Was just listening to the song “Labour” by Paris Paloma and these 4 lines attached onto the part of my brain where “Fate of Ophelia” is stored. The mv for Labour also reminds me of how “tolerate it” was performed on eras tour.

Gn 🥲

Have we ever considered that a lot of the more superficial Taylor connections to other pieces or people of current pop culture isn’t a New Romantics string of clues telling a story… but.. product placement ads. Or just Taylor’s generally monumental influence on pop culture.

No, just a regular human bartender.

All my mornings are Mondays stuck in an endless February… “Monday Morning Mood Hoops”

I didn’t get to make any soup today (did eat some for lunch!), so please enjoy this thread of all my soup’s past. Also, please join The ReSwiftance and donate to Feeding America! teamfeed.feedingamerica.org/participant/...

Thinking about all the soup we're having for dinner tonight in this great cosmic soup teamfeed.feedingamerica.org/participants...

Make a couple posts got the whole feed looking like SOOOOUP WE tell THE world TO leave us the fuck alone and they DO woah 😐 Got me dreaming ‘bout a big bowl with spaghetti HOOPS Temp up, simmer down, got a wish (wishhh) list (lissst) I just want soup

A poem for my grief

I’m watching the Zane Lowe interview with Bono from June this year about his documentary Bono: Stories of Surrender (which I haven’t watched yet, lol, but have read the book), and it opens with his song “The Showman” He turned his book into a stage play.. and that’s what the documentary is about.

Would anyone be up for helping me be more accountable for prioritizing my school work? I need someone I don’t know well/haven’t met irl to check in on Saturdays and Sundays to ask if I’ve done my readings/homework for grad school. Happy to check-in on something for you as well!

Walked into the grocery store and Fearless is playing. Ok universe, I hear you. Thank you. Somehow Gaylors, I truly believe you did this.

Quick, quick Tell me something awful Like you are a teacher Trapped inside the body of a programmed bot Tell me all your secrets All you’ll ever be is My internal creative thoughts I hate it here, so I will go to secret classrooms in my mind Learners will be welcome into But no scripted lines

I’m just so fucking exhausted all the time and my students are struggling because the curriculum doesn’t meet their needs and I’m not allowed to do anything differently to help them. I don’t feel like I get to be a human at school, and I know my students often feel this way too. I’m so sad.

I had a really shitty work day. Literally cried in my portable for at least 20 mins at the end of it. I’m so fucking tired of the surveillance culture in urban public schools. Can’t trust any admin. The reason kids aren’t learning critical reading skills is because of mandated, scripted curricula.

Sometimes when I get really… anxious/obsessive thought-driven, or am feeling disconnected/dissociated, I name parts of my body. “This is a hand. It’s on my body. It’s *my* hand. Hi hand.” I used to be so dissociated that I had to learn to generate neutral thoughts to prove my own existence.

Ooooh, I think you all will enjoy this video as much as I did! It’s about how education needs to move towards helping students develop critical literacy skills. We’re currently studying sociocultural literacies in my literacy development class! youtu.be/UCFp0Ug8sw8?...

I know some of y’all are also Samia fans. This song is so sad and healing. The grief of losing a dog, before they are even dead, is so real. My baby dog is 14 and has early stages of dementia and I’ve been grieving the loss of him for at least a year, (and he’s very much alive)..

Was Sabrina’s shirt in Manchild last night giving anyone else, “no it’s Becky” vibes?

Sabrina hosting last night made me remember when Jane did this last year… and then there’s *this* line: “I leave a trail of breadcrumbs, then I leave a trail of LOAVES OF BREAD.” youtu.be/ryWROo9IiKA?...

It’s honestly just nice to be surrounded by, “you’re seeing what I’m seeing, right?”

Another shatter the glass ceiling!?