Playing the most fun game of “what’s that smell?” In my pantry.

Good morning!

I built 4 perfect babies just fine without their help.

Good morning! Fun fact- I exist thanks to White Castle. My dad’s aunt was my mom’s manager at WC & they met at a wedding of another WC employee. His aunt brought my dad hoping he’d meet young people his own age & my mom couldn’t resist a skinny Marine with a missing tooth. 5 years later- me!

I don’t care that Stacey lies. I care that she doesn’t keep her own stories straight. She reminds me of that movie where Tyra Banks is a doll come to life but less convincing. #RHOP

I thing I don’t appreciate enough about my husband is that he’s really good at reality checking me. I found this gorgeous candle that screams my best friend’s holiday vibe but wasn’t going to get because it was $60. He reminded me we HAVE $60 & isn’t my friend worth it after 30+ years. He was right.

Good morning!

@profanity.accountant how am I doing?

Chicago peeps- don’t try going anywhere you don’t have to. We just got back from grabbing supplies & moving our turkey sandwich party here & it’s rough out there.

Good morning! The weather prediction here was bad enough that we cancelled Turkey Sandwich Day with my extended family. So it best be a doozy of a storm.

Good morning!

The key to having E over for Thanksgiving is activities. We’ve made Wicked cupcakes (we got Elphaba) Wicked cookie pops (Glinda!) and are now making Wicked crystals while watching Wicked One Wonderful Night. It’s a very Wicked Thanksgiving here…

My husband rolled a joint while my daughter was making deviled eggs & I was pan frying bacon wrapped scallops. Needless to say we’ve opened all the windows for a little bit.

My daughter was bummed we forgot to get mimosa stuff. She forgets though that I’m soutside trash. I found a truly ancient bottle of spumanti and am sending someone out for OJ. I am my Gramma’s girl.

Good morning!

If you’re making Tini’s recipes today, hold her closer in your heart. people.com/tini-younger...

As a Veteran, let me remind some of you that the purpose of the United States Constitution is to restrain the power of the federal government, not to restrict the American people. Carry on 🫡🇺🇸

Good morning!

Good morning!

Just to brag about my very glamorous evening, I ate white chocolate peppermint ice cream while watching The Music Man.

GenX Chicago- JoBo of B96 Eddie & JoBo died today. A major piece of my childhood is gone…

On our last proper vacation, my husband wanted to go to a waterfall. I appreciate the existence of nature but prefer to stay out of it. I finally told him I just dying want to go. He went, h stayed in our hotel & watched Schitt’s Creek while eating candy & it was GLORIOUS.

Good morning!

They get so few wins that they're acting like he cured cancer for winning a race in a D+40 city against a Republican who Trump wouldn't endorse & the same guy he beat in the primary. Flipping 13 seats in the VA HOD, 3 in the NJ GA & winning 2 gubernatorial races by 14-15% is a lot more impressive.

Hey @gammareigh.bsky.social you’ve breached containment… and I laughed like a fool at this. 💗💗💗

I think they’re starting to work.

I just made my dog a quesadilla to get him to take his anxiety meds.

Good morning!

Picture it- Lombard, IL, 2025… we go to a lovely Greek restaurant for a family lunch. There’s 9 of us. We had a reservation. I’m walking in & see a guy in his Army dress blues. Initially I joke to my husband “well, I’m underdressed!” Then say “shit. I bet there’s a funeral.”

I was still feeling cute after lunch with my in laws so I forced my husband to take me out. I’m done & am back in jammies, but still pretty cute if I’m being honest.

This is the absolute truth. It doesn't matter how much money you make either. Look at how they treated Serena Williams when she had her first daughter. Study after study proves what we already know.

This is the most expensive piece of furniture we own. Le sigh. (It’s a fancy custom Crate & Barrel swivel chair & a half that we waited almost a year for. It’s now where dogs nap.)

This poor fella has a yeast infection in his ears & on the way into the vet (WHICH HE HATES) he got his back paw caught in the door then this morning reopened the scab & bled on mom’s nice jammies. Nothing is coming up Cosmo this week.

Good morning!

Guys it’s fine. Botulism prevents autism. And you know- being alive, but the kid isn’t going to be weird, isn’t that great?!? (Calm down, my kid & husband are autistic- use your sarcasm voice.)

Good morning!

I was pestering E for her Christmas list. This bitch asks me “have you heard of Apple Watches?” I asked if she heard if I don’t have Apple Watch money. 😂😂😂 (my kids were mad I called her this bitch, my husband reminded them she’s my cousin & I get to frustrated.😂)

My 23 year old just referred to my husband & my play list as overplayed retail soundtracks. Well. It’s not OUR fault that grocery stores have awesome music these days!

My job is very dumb but I am VERY good at it. 😂

Good morning on this lovely Trans day of remembrance. Your identity matters because YOU matter.

Since arriving in Congress in 2019 as the youngest Black woman ever elected, I’ve had 19 pieces of legislation signed into law — delivering real progress on health care, veterans’ services, homeland security, and more.

Texas' abortion ban has killed another woman. Let's be very clear: Republicans are killing women. Democrats need to start calling them murderers loudly and often. www.propublica.org/article/texa...

Good morning!

I'm having complicated and frustrated thoughts about having to see reminders all over my feed that the president said something jaw-droppingly fatphobic in public while at the same time wondering how many of those people themselves make fat jokes and only clock this one as bad because Trump said it

*taps mic* John Thune is the Senate Majority Leader. He’s the Republican you don’t complain about as you negatively fixate on the Jewish guy who is the Minority Leader, no matter what he does. Like how the unanimous consent removed any room for the White House to change their mind on the petition.

You know what I miss the most about being young? Controlling my own body temperature. Somehow I’m both hot AND cold? This menopause shit is ridiculous.

My hottest most unpopular take- WHITE dem women should be taking this shift from MTG as an opportunity- self serving or not. She seems to crave positive attention & is currently sort of receptive. It’s stupid to not try to flip her. To be VERY CLEAR- white women should be doing this.

My oldest’s ACA coverage went from $18/month to $98/month. At least they had the decency to boost the plan some, but yeah, 5X increase. Are we great yet?

I swear my dad’s birthday is harder than his death anniversary. He built a life he didn’t know was possible as a child & only got to live it for 56 years. He only met 3 of his 10 grandbabies & only danced at 1 of our weddings.

This guy should be 77 today. He deserved to get there. 💗💗💗