These are different angles from the same junction. We build things like the one on the left whilst leaving the one on the right to rot. Enshittification of the UK ramps up with every passing year 😔

It's lunchtime on Christmas Eve and yet the corporate round robin emails are still coming. If I don't care about them on a random Tuesday in July, I sure as shit don't care about them today ❤️

Just saw someone condemn Christmas movies as "more like an advert for Christmas than a piece of art about it" because they're so desperate to tap into an anti-capitalist zeitgeist But they haven't even seen Home Alone or The Muppet Christmas Carol Ma'am, you are NOT qualified to speak on this 😭😭

Okay but seriously people who bring children to supermarkets after 20 December deserve jail without trial. Lenient sentences may be considered for those who are least *try* to control their manic sprogs.

I keep getting complaints from family that I don't visit them *enough* – yet they never visit me *at all*? Like?? Whether it's across the city or halfway down the country, it's always me who travels. They also never *invite* me – I have to prompt it every single time – and I'm STILL the bad guy?!

Watching Lisa vs Malibu Stacey (season 5), and have only just noticed after all these years that they recycled the character designs of the German business men who buy the nuclear power plant in season 3 cc: @criminalsimpsons.com

I've tried many times, but I simply cannot love the sequels. They're so generic and sloppy that I can't even recall their names or which one's which. It maddens me to this day that "somehow Palpatine returned" is an actual line from the script and not some derogatory meme.

Wild that Mitt Romney is to the left of Rachel Reeves on this 🥴

He's giving leading man in a Hallmark movie

Wait this season of America has a good twink vs evil twin subplot? What the hell, sure.

Three things I cannot stand are being interrupted, talked over, and spoken for. When all three happen at once, I really have to bite my tongue because it's like wtf am I doing here??

Public transport being delayed before it's even up and running is sooo modern Britain it hurts

I need one of those fancy-pants boiling water taps because the ~60 seconds it takes for the kettle to boil is too long. My life is an endless cycle of boiling the kettle, getting distracted in those 60 seconds, forgetting about the kettle, and boiling it again.

I'm so mad at myself for wasting the whole evening with a nap on the couch In other news, I'm so pleased with myself for spending the whole evening taking the best nap ever on the couch

Just answered the door to accept an Evri delivery and the guy just... tried to walk into my house? And then looked at me like I was the weird one??

Decided to rectify the situation with some actual cinema

So I saw that there was a 2025 remake of War of the Worlds. I thought, "Hey, I like that movie!" I turned it off not even five minutes in because it was a glorified advert for Microsoft Teams 💀 If you're gonna make a movie of product placement, don't make it about WORK 😭

Okay but with the Labour Party it's hard to tell whether this is a blatant lie because Starmer is shitting himself, or if they're so wedded to TERFy gender politics that they're gonna do on-stage genital inspections before the first hustings 🤷‍♂️

Lmao lady you described the President as a petty, hard-headed drunk 💀 there's no "context" that can save you now 😭

Sure, thick thighs may save lives. But you know what they don't save? MONEY. I can't keep buying jeans, my children are starving.

I am SO determined to witness New York in the snow 😭 been insanely jealous of every picture I've seen today

Caved in and finally started watching Heated Rivalry

Sat, seated and sitting down The New Yorker is so fascinating, I *will* be subscribing for year 101

Early Christmas present – pour moi, de moi xo (But seriously: look how pretty 😍)

This couple: > D+83 > Both bisexual (she only dates men, he's in his first mf relationship) > Live in Bushwick, shop in Williamsburg > She runs a thriving gallery in an ex-industrial unit > He's a part-time barista who sells artisanal pickles on the side

Whenever they post these graphics, it's so easy to misread them as "defecation" which is funny bc Reform is in fact full of shit

Microsoft has changed the layout of Outlook (web version) and made everything worrrse 😭 where is the mark as read button? Why are the emails in reverse order?? Why do random drop-downs keep popping up???

I'm hatin' it

"What we need is for me to have a bigger voice." – Jasmine Crockett This isn't even a sarcastic paraphrase. She straight up just says this. What was once the faint hope of Blexas is well and truly cooked.

Coach K on LNER trains is half standard class, half first class. Some fur-clad woman used the wrong door at Edinburgh and looked utterly horrified that she'd stumbled into our cattle truck section.

I nipped into Sostrene Grene to grab some cute wrapping paper and came out 25 minutes later with wrapping paper, fancy cards, gift tags, tree ornaments, candles, a live reindeer, my own candy cane factory and shares in the company

The size difference between Jonathan Bailey and David Corenswet 😭

Y'know those people who book leave from the 18th til the New Year? Let them do it. Means things are quiet over Christmas for those of us still "holding the fort", and then we can take our leave when everyone else starts coming back. It's like getting two holidays if you think about it 💁‍♂️

I'm not a gamer. GTA once in a blue moon, that's it bf set up his Xbox Series S, but discs are useless so I either need to pay again or switch consoles Just wired up the Xbox One... and it's been updating for 25 minutes What happened to games you could just play?? 😭 Don't even want to anymore 😭😭

🎄 First Christmas tree in my own wee house 🥰

Boomers foam at the mouth for National Service, but here's the rub: Millennials and Gen Z aren't willing to die for countries that have been shitting on us non-stop to keep the boomer bubble intact. And who'll pay your pensions if we're all dead? news.sky.com/story/young-...

Same energy

Just had to teach my little cousin the difference between saying "playing with myself" and "playing by myself" 💀

Okay but seriously WHEN will that damn gay hockey show be available to watch in the UK? 😭

People who still indulge in "Die Hard is a Christmas movie" discourse in the year of our lord 2025 are the same people who bring you "pineapple doesn't belong on pizza" and "that dress was white and gold" btw

If Joe Biden had done this Jake Tapper would have gone to Death-con One

Trains are delayed by like 100 minutes and everyone is stressed and pissed off in our standing room-only carriage – but a woman lifted her baby out of a pram and he started smiling and laughing because there were so many people and everybody instantly cheered up 1000% 🥹

Close enough, welcome back Amy Brookheimer

I feel my brain literally frying in my skull whenever I end up reading ai-generated slop not least because I despair at how many people can't tell it apart

I pledge my votes forevermore to anyone who will abolish bookshops putting stickers on front covers 😤

I beg you to consider what the reaction would (correctly!) be if the Tories or Reform even briefly considered binning trial by jury after 800 years

just got charged FIVE great british pounds sterling for this sandwich 💀

>Inflation is 3.8% >Pensioners get a bump of 4.8% >Government scratches its head >Young people get private pension contributions pilfered and dragged into higher tax brackets for the next SIX years Fuck this fucking shithole country man what are we even doing

One good thing that might come from the Government doling out yet another bump for pensions is they'll finally adjust income tax bands (or at least tax-free allowance) for the rest of us – couldn't possibly have the old dears paying tax when they've aLrEaDy pAiD iNtO tHe sYsTeM

Oh no wicked was SO not good