Emotional sensitivity isn’t simply a gift or a flaw - it depends on where it comes from. At its healthiest, it deepens compassion and connection. When rooted in unaddressed trauma or shame, it can lead to reactions that hurt ourselves and others.

This passage is from the book I’m currently working on. I explore these ideas deeply over two chapters.   If you’d like to learn more, you’re warmly invited to join my free newsletter. Click here to join: danielasieff.com/sign-up/ #danielasieff #chronicshame #shamebasedidentity #shameandpower

The many names for shame reveal how central and painful it is. They also mean that we often miss it. In my upcoming book, I explore the many expressions of shame of both healthy and chronic shame. If you’d like to learn more, you’re invited to join my free newsletter 👉 danielasieff.com/sign-up/

Working with chronic shame is not only personal work. It quietly shapes the emotional climate around us, reducing the harm we pass on and widening what becomes possible between people.My upcoming book on chronic shame explores how we can work with chronic shame and the difference that makes to us ✨

Some shame comes from the inside - not from being seen, but from feeling we’ve betrayed ourselves. Sometimes there is a genuine betrayal, and then we need to listen to shame. But other times, we are betraying values that are not true to us. And then we have to step forward anyhow.

Grief is not a detour from healing chronic shame; it is part of the path. It is something I explore in depth in my upcoming book on chronic shame and its healing. If you’d like to learn more, you’re warmly invited to join my free newsletter via this link – www.danielasieff.com/sign-up

Chronic shame isn’t a passing warning signal. It’s a distorted alarm system turned against the self. I explore this in depth in my upcoming book on chronic shame. Feel free to join my free newsletter for updates, priority webinar booking, and discounts - danielasieff.com/sign-up/

Shame has a genuine protective role to play in our lives, but it can also become distorted. This kind of inner shaming voice is a distortion. I explore this topic in my upcoming book. If you’d like to learn more, please click here to join - danielasieff.com/sign-up/

This is from a draft of the book I am writing on chronic shame. Healing asks for the next step, not the whole path. If you’d like to learn more and get priority booking and discounts for the webinars I’ll run once the book is published, sign up link here - danielasieff.com/sign-up/

Shame is part of being human, and so healing from chronic shame does not mean getting rid of it. Instead, it means learning how to recognise it and steady ourselves when it arises. #DanielaSieff #ChronicShame #HealingShame #TraumaHealing #DepthPsychology #EmotionalResilience #SelfDiscovery

Shame can isolate, yet it’s always relational. It can be healthy or harmful. My book explores both through lived experience - mine and others’ - and research in anthropology, evolution, depth psychology, and emotion. Join my free newsletter to learn more: danielasieff.com/sign-up/

Emotional resilience is not emotional control. It’s the ability to notice when we’re overwhelmed and hold our feelings before acting on them. Like learning to swim as an adult, it develops slowly - we practise, falter, and try again, and over time it changes how we relate to ourselves and others.

Chronic shame may never fully disappear - but healing changes how we relate to it. For me, the shift came when I stopped silencing shame and learned to recognise it, endure it, and return from it. I explore this in my forthcoming book, to see more of this topic - danielasieff.com/sign-up/

I offer an on-demand presentation on the Archetypal Death Parent and toxic shame, exploring how internalised beliefs of unworthiness form through early caregivers and distort relationships To learn more please see link here - courses.danielasieff.com/store/arch-d...

When I interviewed Daniel Siegel for my first book, he talked about how rigidity and chaos contribute to mental suffering. Do you notice yourself pulled more toward rigidity or chaos? #DanielaSieff #DanielSiegel #TraumaHealing #EmotionalHealing #HealingJourney #SelfCompassion

I first read Sam Keen’s book more than twenty years ago. These words spoke to me then, and they still talk to me now. I return to them again and again – especially at the start of the year. #DanielaSieff #SamKeen #ReflectiveInquiry #QuestionsThatMatter #InnerQuestions #SelfReflection

These words from Marion Woodman always strike a chord, and in particular, they come to mind as I approach the New Year and reflect on change. “Change means change. Stark honesty, however painful, is needed... We must be willing to face many cruel truths” #MarionWoodman

A brief message to wish you all the best over the holidays ✨ #DanielaSieff #TraumaHealing #ChristmasReflection #HolidayRealities #GentleChristmas #InnerPeace #EmotionalWellbeing #YouAreNotAlone #ChristmasAndEmotions #EndOfYearReflections

What if your “bad” feelings aren’t bad at all, but evolution’s way of protecting you? Shame, anxiety, and sadness may hurt - but they can also heal. @randynesse.bsky.social has written about this in his brilliant book: “Good Reasons for Feeling Bad.” #DanielaSieff #ShameHealing #TraumaHealing

Fear grabs us when danger is near, but some fear runs quietly in the background. Healing means bravely bringing these unconscious fears into awareness. I explore this in my essay Fear Created by Trauma Often Operates Unconsciously - danielasieff.com/reflections-...

My niece Lottie asked, ‘How many cups of tea do you drink a day?’ Honestly… far too many. Whenever I get stuck writing, tea feels like the answer. My next book on chronic shame is basically fuelled by an alarming amount of tea! 🫖 #WritersLife #TeaLovers #BookWriting #AuthorLife #TeaTime

Working on my book about shame is reshaping how I see resilience. It’s not about bouncing back, but staying present with the pain we’ve avoided - and choosing responses that support growth. #DanielaSieff #ShameHealing #TraumaRecovery #EmotionalResilience #HealingJourney #TraumaHealing

On World Kindness Day, I’m reminded: healing begins with self-compassion. It took years to learn, but it changed everything. #DanielaSieff #WorldKindnessDay #SelfCompassion #TraumaHealing #TraumaRecovery #HealingJourney #EmotionalHealing #InnerHealing #KindnessToYourself #OvercomingShame

Between cave and sky, Macfarlane finds a thin border. Between light and shadow, so do we. We slip between the conscious and the hidden self - sometimes gently, sometimes without warning. #DanielaSieff #DepthPsychology #InnerJourney #ShadowWork #TraumaHealing #SelfDiscovery

Writing this book was so important for my own understanding, and I'm always deeply moved to know it contributes to others. Reviews like this mean so much. #DanielaSieff #EmotionalHealing #InnerHealing #TraumaHealing #ShameAwareness #EmotionalTrauma #InnerGrowth #PersonalGrowth

The best part of writing? When it’s done - and it actually says what I meant to say. That click when the structure works, the ideas land, and I can think, Yes… that’s it! #DanielaSieff #AmWriting #AmEditing #WritersLife #BookInProgress #AuthorsOfInstagram #NonfictionWriter #ChronicShame

We celebrate what is ‘up’: positivity, achievement, optimism. But in the psyche, as in the earth, the depths hold treasures too. Descent can bring understanding, transformation, and a different kind of light. #DanielaSieff #DepthPsychology #InnerJourney #ShadowWork #TraumaHealing #SelfDiscovery

Today is World Trauma Day. Trauma shapes lives in unseen ways. The defences that once kept us safe can later hold us back, shutting out connection, growth & joy. Healing means not just dismantling walls, but building new resources to meet life as we are now. #WorldTraumaDay #TraumaHealing

For World Mental Health Day, I’m sharing an excerpt from my conversation with Allan Schore. As he says, security isn’t automatic. It is something we build through lived experience, self-reflection, and nourishing relationships. #DanielaSieff #AllanSchore #WorldMentalHealthDay

Imagination can be a lifeline, yet it can also become a prison. For many, retreating inward was once the only way to survive. #DanielaSieff #Trauma #TraumaAwareness #TraumaHealing #EmotionalTrauma #MentalHealth

One of the themes I’m exploring in my upcoming book on chronic shame is how it takes root, how it distorts our sense of self, and how we can begin to loosen its grip. #DanielaSieff #ChronicShame #ShameAwareness #ShameHealing #HealingFromShame #TraumaHealing #HealingJourney #EmotionalHealing

Healing from trauma isn’t quick or simple, but it is possible. Over time, we discover new ways to live so that trauma no longer defines us. #DanielaSieff #ChronicShame #ShameHealing #TraumaHealing #ShameAwareness #HealingJourney #EmotionalHealing #InnerHealing #SelfWorth #SelfCompassion

When life is too much, the psyche makes a trade. It hides our most tender and vital parts, not because they are broken but because they are too precious to risk further injury. #DanielaSieff #emotionaltrauma #healingjourney #traumarecovery #donaldkalsched #Jungianpsychology

If this speaks to something in you, I would love to hear how it lands. Your reflections are always welcome here. And if you would like to go deeper, I invite you to join my mailing list. In my newsletters, I share more about these inner dynamics, the roots of emotional pain,

Some people describe emotionally reactive people as being ‘over-sensitive’. 🌱 Other people say that there is no such thing as ‘over-sensitivity’ and that all sensitivity is a gift. 🌱 Experience tells me that emotional sensitivity can be a gift, but that can also be problematic. 🌱

Healing from trauma may feel like a series of breakthroughs. 🌱 But mostly it is a matter of patience and perseverance. 🌱 We do not think our way into wholeness with a single insight. 🌱

We don’t see the world as it is. We see it through lenses that are shaped by our environment and our history. 🌱 Some lenses bring clarity, helping us meet life with presence and compassion. Others, especially those formed by trauma, can warp what we see and hear. 🌱

What begins as a quest to heal trauma often unfolds into a lifelong journey of growth. 🌱 At first, this can feel shocking; when we start to work with what we carry, we hope for a clear endpoint.

I never cease to be amazed at the beauty created through evolution. #SoulFood #NatureHealing #NatureWonder

Following people on here doesn’t mean you see all their posts. 🌱 I know my own timelines are dominated by posts from just a few of the many people I follow. 🌱 So, if you want to get news of my work and offerings, then subscribe to my mailing list. 🌱

Humans have evolved to learn through observing & copying those with more experience than we have. 🌱 That is because our species lives in extremely wide range of physical, cultural, social & emotional environments, & to gather the knowledge needed to function in those

Dag Hammarskjöld (1905-1961) was a Swedish economist & diplomat who served as the second secretary-general of the UN from 1953-1961. . Some of his reflections were collected in a book called ‘Marking’s published in 1964. This post is a quote from book. 🍀 🍀

Deep inside us are wordless stories about who we are and how we came to be this way. 🌱 There are similar inner stories about the people and experiences that have impacted us. 🌱 These stories live in our bodies and emotions, as well as in our minds and beliefs. 🌱 .

If we live with the impact of trauma, we’ll have cut off the parts of ourselves which we believe made us vulnerable to wounding. 🌱 At the same time, we’ll have cultivated qualities that appear to offer us protection from retraumatisation.

Another wonderful artist I discovered on social media. 🌱 I really recommend following social media accounts which bring beauty, awe and wonder into your lives. 🌱 This photograph is of a young Suri girl. 🌱

1st draft of my book on shame has gone to editors! It's an exploration of what shame evolved to do, & why it holds power. Then I look at how it becomes chronic & toxic, & how we heal when that happens. I draw on evolution, anthropology, psychology & lived experience—both mine & that of others.

Toxic shame leaves us frightened of showing who we are to both others and to ourselves. That’s because at some deep level we believe we are flawed in a way that makes us inadequate compared to other people. 🌱

Marion Woodman: 🌱 “Therapy is often seen as a way to solve a specific problem. 🌱 That [view]...blinds us to the ever-unfolding process that is life. 🌱 ...the image that best describes this journey is that of a spiral. 🌱 We keep turning around a central point... 🌱

For me, these words from Dr Bruce Lloyd offer a powerful description of how toxic shame - if not brought to consciousness - drives us in malignant ways. 🌱 When we are unconscious of the toxic shame that we carry, a gnawing sense of inadequacy sits like a bottomless hole at

A simple way to grasp the difference between healthy and toxic shame is to think of the more familiar differences between healthy fear and anxiety. Fear is valuable when it arises in the face of genuine danger, directs us to act in ways that get us to safety, and fades once the danger has passed.