As a former A's fan, it's infuriating to see the city of Modesto lose their MiLB team. Like the A's, this was completely unnecessary. Don't let the powers that be (hedge fund managers, private equity investors, etc.) tell you that your stadium isn't adequate. It's all bullshit.

Stay Fabulous. 😘

Journalism Professors when I was in school: Try using an em dash from time to time instead of commas to really give your writing an extra punch! The Whole Fucking World right now: An em dash is an obvious sign that it was written by AI. No human uses those. Me: Lol, whatevs.

According to the Congressional Budget Office, federal funding for SNAP benefits, colloquially known as food stamps, may be reduced by as much as $186 billion by 2034. Everyone deserves healthy, fulfilling meals. Please donate any money or time you can to your local food bank.

I haven't been this depressed in a long time. It's whatever, life is all horseshit.

Party hard until death because that's the whole point of existence.

When I think back on the truly heinous things people have done to me, I notice all of the perpetrators have 2 traits in common: 1. They're male 2. They're American No foreigner or lady has ever made me fear for my safety, robbed me at gunpoint, or sexually assaulted me in my sleep. USA, baby!

"It's a Saturday, time for crime!"

I love sports for many reasons, but one of the main ones is it brings so many disparate groups of people together for one common purpose, and few things are more beautiful than human harmony.

Coolest shit in life ranked: 1. Getting laid 2. High fives with total strangers at a game because our team won 3. Free pizza

Life is pretty screwed up, but there's always funky music.

Never forget, the only person in charge of your emotions is you, and you're allowed to feel however you want.

Nothing better than pro sports in the morning, except getting laid in the morning.

After talking about it for years, I'll finally make the trip down to Visalia to watch the Ports play against the Rawhide this weekend.

I honestly have zero hope for the future, both my own and this country. Everything is terrible and I'm powerless to do anything.

I take solace in the fact that John Fisher will be dead long before me and I'll be able to routinely piss on his grave until I join him in hell. #OpeningDay

Spring has sprung! Now go get laid.

It's always extremely satisfying to hit my daily step goal before noontime.

Yeah, things right now are all weird and shitty, but it's Fabulous Friday, the sun is shining again, and I have cold beers in the fridge.

Seven years is too long to wait, I need that asteroid to hit us sometime in the next couple of months.

Getting plenty of exercise on a daily basis is the really easy part. Developing the discipline to have a balanced diet is where it gets hard, especially as a stoner.

All of a sudden everything is back to normal. No ads whatsoever. I'm glad, but still, what the hell?

Company That I Applied To Three Months Ago: Sorry, we went with another candidate! Me: No shit, I assumed that when I didn't hear anything for THREE MONTHS.

Welp, just found out that the music playing app (Muzio) I purchased a "lifetime" subscription to 4 years ago now wants $5.99 PER WEEK to not inundate me with ads. Keep in mind, this isn't even a streaming app, it plays music I downloaded that I ALREADY PAID FOR. Fucking insanity.

The Business Finance course I'm taking this semester seems like it will be way less stressful than the Managerial Economics class I had in the fall session. I'm happy as hell!

The first thing that came to mind during today's finance lesson when the professor mentioned 'Business Ethics.'

To all the babies bitching about the Dodgers spending more money than your favorite team, just be glad you still have a fucking team.

I hadn't heard of Overtime Elite until today, but it seems like an interesting concept and the basketball is pretty good so far.

Life is all about choices.

If tragedy strikes and your first instinct is to point fingers instead of saying, "Oh damn, this is serious, how can I help?" there's a 100% chance you're a piece of shit.

Props to the person that left $5 wedged into the Clipper card machine at Concord BART. Every buck counts!

When a liberal area suffers a climate change disaster, Republicans say “God is punishing them.” When a conservative area suffers a climate change disaster, Republicans say “Democrats control weather machines.” Must be hard going through life as a full-blown idiot.

I've got a streak of 465 days in a row of getting at least 12,000 steps, and this week I decided to get back into weightlifting on alternating days. I feel great, but holy shit, I'm extremely hungry all day now.

D̶r̶y̶ J̶a̶n̶u̶a̶r̶y̶ High January

As a baseball maniac I can't believe I never watched "Hardball" until today. This movie is hilarious.

Stay high for the 2-5.

Happy fuckin' New Year.

Stay Fabulous. 😘

Fuck it, life's a bitch, but we still party as hard as possible until the end.

I'm in this erratic emotional place where I'm depressed about losing Rickey but still enraged at John Fisher and Major League Baseball. Compartmentalizing this feels impossible.

Geez, the copyediting at so many news outlets is exceedingly bad now. Small local publication, huge national publisher, it truly doesn't matter. I routinely come across an abundance of mistakes. As a person with a Journalism degree it depresses the hell out of me.

Alternative headline: Most US teens are totally uncool

I just took my last test for the semester, and man, graduate-level Economics was some crazy shit! That might be the hardest class I ever had, right up there with Logic/Philosophy. I'm pumped as hell that I made it through.

Friends: So what are you getting for Christmas? Me: High.

You know that weird liminal space between Christmas and NYE where everyone is effectively checked out and nothing major gets done? I'm already there since I'm being laid off at the end of the month.

My man turned 26 and aged out of his parents' health coverage, and his first thought was, "Oh hell no, somebody is getting clipped for this shit."

"It's like a jungle sometimes, it makes me wonder how I keep from going under."

My Brain: Hey, it was your birthday last week and you didn't have a cake, how 'bout we DoorDash some Krispy Kreme? Me: Hell yeah. *Pulls up app* Me: 31 DOLLARS BEFORE TIP?!?!!?! Sorry, Brain, we're walking to Safeway and buying Oreos for like five bucks.

Well, it's been 5 years since I was in Chicago and I hate Major League Baseball so I think it's fine to admit it: I touched the outfield ivy during the Wrigley Field tour specifically because we were told not to.