My cat says meow meow, but I know if she wanted to she could say bow wow because she’s got that dog in her

💪😌💪

You, an idiot: “there’s Halloween music and Christmas music, but we don’t have Thanksgiving music.” Me, wisely: “The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald.”

Happy Thanksgiving to everyone but especially Goku 😭😭😭😭😭

In the grim darkness of the 41st millennia,Thanksgiving has been replaced by Hatesgiving

So I was playing a children’s game (musical chairs) at Friendsgiving last night, pulled my hamstring, and then when I got home my leg gave out and I collapsed on the floor and this morning it took 10 minutes to get out of bed. Prime of my life, baybeeeeeee

I could survive six nights at Freddy’s easily

Finished Station Eleven.

Now seated for Sisu, if it suck im gonna call it Peepoo.

They called Johnny Guitar Johnny Guitar because he was good at guitar. Likewise they call me Johnny Bigwiener.

Man wait til you find out about trans people

My very considerate and wonderful friend gave me a (formatted) reading list of about 15 books she thinks I’d like, and I’m about two thirds of the way through, and I gotta say I really like Station Eleven.

So was Trump slorking on that hog or not

Now seated for The Running Man, if it sucks im gonna call it Running Away from this Movie, Man

So was Epstein sucking on that thang or something?

The mf who saw a potato and said “I can make a salad out of that” was on one frfr, absolute legend

Now seated for Predator: Badlands, if it sucks im gonna call it Predator: Badmovie

Now seated for Die My Love, if it sucks im gonna cal it Dump My Butt

My supervisor had a stroke last night so now all his cases are my cases and I’m gonna fucking lose it

If I see any one of you motherfuckers not being woke today I’m sending the caliphate janissaries after you.

www.tiktok.com/t/ZP8DfHXNA/ eat shit Cheney

Bluesky rn

I think it’s fucked up that Dick Cheney got to die before he had to see a Muslim become mayor of New York.

I think it’s neat that Dick Cheney is dead.

Gee it’s almost like our capital class are parasites that should be burned in their homes idk

I feel like someone should have done something about Yakub.

I don’t think we talk about how much MGS V whips, and frankly that’s a shame.

Drag party, tell me I’m pretty.

Frankenstein had the aesthetics and narrative sensibilities of a Hideo Kojima game, it’s wild.

Now seated for Frankenstein, if it’s bad I’m gonna call it Frankensucks

A buddy of mine wants to do a drag themed birthday party this weekend and I may have bought too mini a miniskirt

Live your life in such a way that Solid Snake would be proud of you.

I’ve started paying a woman to come by and clean my house every two weeks and it’s the most adult thing I r ever done, I can’t ever go back

I’m winning hearts and minds.

I’m wrapping up replaying every metal gear game and honestly? I think this works as the end, spiritually. youtu.be/KvzDAj2JQN0?...

Now seated for Good Fortune, if it sucks you might think I’d call it Bad Fortune, but actually that’s lazy and you’re wrong, I’m gonna call it Good Riddance.

I don’t think my crush understands just how much I know about the lore of Warhammer 40k. If she knew just how much I knew about the Horus Heresy and Logan Grimnar, she would finally see me the way I see her.

A grasshopper landed on my guitar so strong that he plucked all six strings and I think it’s his now

The corn maze is body shaming me

Now seated for The Black Phone 2, if it sucks im gonna call it The Bad Fart 2 (the 2 is poop)

We out here

I like reading book recommendations from people because when you read enough of them from someone, and you see what speaks to them, you begin to understand them better.

🎶I was in your wet dream cranking on my hog (clap 👏 clap👏!)🎶 😭😭😭😭😭😭

Now seated for Roofman, if it sucks I’m gonna call it Rough, Man.

🎶I was in your wet dream cranking on my hog (clap 👏 clap👏!)🎶 😭😭😭😭😭😭

If Donald Fagen was a superhero they’d call him the Dan of Steel

If Donald Fagen was a superhero they call him the Dan of Steel

I just finished the new season of Blowback and it’s incredible. Fidel Castro and the Cuban military defeated the South Africans in open war, and I cannot believe that the man was so incredibly instrumental in the end of Apartheid. Truly the best to ever do it. UNDEFEATED. THE GOAT.

Look at this asshole