Every night when I go to sleep I go to Hell and work my shift as the bathroom attendant. It may not be my dream job but it is my dream job.

Painter Guy: “Do you want me to take off the door knob or tape & paint around” Me: oh 🙂 you can just tape & paint around it’s kind of a pain to get these ones off Painter Guy: “We usually take them off” Me: Y’know you could have simply not asked & done whatever

Being Cask of Amontillado’d on a Tuesday 😔

Trying to remember how to say Stuart Semple’s last name in a conversation about how much we hate Anish Kapoor so we google it in the most unbiased fashion.

Kids these days don’t know about zines!!!

Flirting through threats of violence since 1996

Hey everyone, just wanted to let you all know I am redacting my fluency in English. Thank you.

Cooking in my own kitchen, still wanted by the FDA for food crimes.

Yo, is it gay if your slab of hot metal overlaps with your homies slab of hot metal in the forge? . . . Asking for a friend…

When a dentist I went to years ago retired he sold all his patient info to a rando who calls me twice a month and texts more frequently even though I have long since told them I moved from the area and have a new dentist.

I am a supportive friend.

Hey guys I think something is wrong with my dog??

Text from my brother who is getting married next year. Should I text him I want to be Dr. Scrimble Cornelius the 8th, Esquire?

Text from my brother who is getting married next year. Should I text him I want to be Dr. Scrimble Cornelius the 8th, Esquire?

I’m very funny.

I love when a movie is like angry father at daughters mysterious fiancé bc he’s “traditional” & fiancé didn’t ask for permission before the engagement but is totally okay w/ the other daughter taking her sis’s previous long term bf as her spouse & is mad his child hasn’t “gotten over that already”

For my fellow Pokémon enjoyers. cajunavenger.github.io

Please admire this model I had the pleasure of working with.

The boy playing video games: “Only problem with this build is dealing with the ranges enemies” Me: cause you’re a close range murder hunk The boy: “Did you just call me a murder homo?” Me: I infact, did not. The boy: “Would’ve been funny if you did.”

Oh congrats on being Gender Fluid

They are in love. (4 millions of years)

Oh yeaaaaah babbbby hotel owner outaaaageeeee yeaaaaaaaah

~Getting my nails done at Gil’s~ ☺️💅🏼

Much like a shark my body has decided I needed more teeth and the local dentists have found I have created another wisdom tooth since my last x ray bringing me to a total of 6 now

After 10,000 years these bad boys are finally starting to look like real Tongs. :)

Califor-nya-cation

Cooking with Friends in Tears of The Kingdom.

If you would like to take a few of my blacksmith classes I am about to blast out a mailer soon on the mailing list. There will be a bunch of them available including full 6 day tracks and one day session One Shots. Not subscribed? Click link in next post...