Just incredible meanness from everyone except Buffet (& that percentage is too low isn’t it? Shouldn’t it be 46%?). Imagine if your LIFETIME donation to charity was $60

Come on Liz, work your magic

Exile for me, asylum seeking for thee

What if it never stops raining

It seems as if this might have turned out to be made up - and AI generated? Dismal view of the future, that humans are kept busy happily reading & discussing AI stories in a corner while it gets on with taking over the world

Think I forgot to post my weevil bowl - pretty happy with how this turned out

Happy Valentine’s Day! - why not celebrate by going to look at my painting in the Alt Valentines show at Lido Stores gallery, Margate

All the ice skaters are falling over, what is happening

In terms of what cures are being lost: - Epstein-Barr virus is perhaps the major trigger for multiple sclerosis - herpes simplex virus causes cold sores, genital herpes, infections in babies, deadly meningitis - shingles virus causes an intensely painful disease

Painting, oil on canvas

Watching backflip man doing his skating holy shit (someone sew him another costume though)

The speed skating relay is the most confusing thing I’ve ever seen

Only watched one episode of Small Prophets & it already seems like it might be amazing. The most depressing possible setup at first - I had to get over my massive reluctance to watch Michael Palin looking bewildered in a care home

Anyone complaining about British food getting blocked for the crime of being unbearably boring

omg everybody go draw a horse this is what the internet was made for gradient.horse

Why was the music & sound so terrible at the ice dancing? Like standing outside a Reading nightclub on a wet weekday night

Am I imagining it or has there just been another massive jump in the amount a completely ordinary sized supermarket shop costs?

That man doing a back flip on ice is truly crazy

Find it too stressful to watch the curling because just can’t believe these husband & wife teams are going to be able to have public discussions about the best way to do things without it ending in ‘Well what a surprise, the thing I said wouldn’t work doesn’t work’ etc through gritted smiling teeth

Nothing tells you you’re back in London like a Tube train that’s put out of action because someone’s shat themselves at 4pm (a ‘code 1’ on the tannoy it seems, FYI)

People will tell you that carrot tops ‘make great pesto’ but I tried it once & the person I was cooking for said it was like eating hair. Which it was. One of the great cooking tip swindles

My painting Loungers is in Memento Amoris at the Lido Stores gallery in Margate - from this Saturday!

It must be so strange to be one of those actors who are in everything but not quite famous. All day being greeted by people who think they must know you from the school run/pottery class/Colin’s party etc etc

Victoria, it's only the first episode of As Seen on TV. It doesn't really need to be anything spe- www.youtube.com/watch?v=4v-q...

Very interested to read that Mark Haddon had long Covid & stopped being able to write for a while but could do visual art. I had the same experience - they must use your brain in a different way I think? Wish someone would study this

Why can’t I get anything done without a looming deadline?? I need to hire an exam invigilator to tap their watch threateningly or a tiger to chase me round the room

Imagine if there were actual consequences for child abuse & domestic violence. None of this would be happening because all these guys would have been stripped of any power before they even got started

I found school exhausting as it was - can’t imagine how I’d manage in modern schools which have had all the art & music etc ground out of them in favour of more maths

My giant insect drawings are still up in Riding Wine co for the moment. As far as I know Madonna hasn’t been in yet but she’s still got time

I know it might not be the most urgent issue of our time but I just had a Jaffa Cake & the size they are now is an absolute disgrace

Must be such a shock for those people who ferociously facetune their photos when they catch sight of a mirror. Surely AI mirrors where you can filter your reflection must be on the way

This is unsurprising to me as I find myself surrounded by women who are absolutely crumbling at the demands being put on them, particularly caring for ill elderly parents & teenage children with mental health issues simultaneously. It’s unsustainable for the system to rely on this as it does

It would be good to get off Instagram which is obviously terrible - but there really doesn’t seem to be an alternative for art things unfortunately at the moment. Bluesky is pretty useless for visual art stuff, I don’t know why

I’ve got a painting in this exhibition at the Lido Stores gallery in Margate - from February 7

Having one of those days where you feel obscurely guilty all day but can’t remember what for

Offseason festival in Margate going great so far - here’s my exhibition Bugs all set up

Most satisfying ending of #TheTraitors so far

This starts of funny then gradually becomes really impressive then somehow shifts into genuinely haunting. What a talent.

If your neighbour sets their house on fire for 4 years & then puts the fire out for 4 years & then sets their house on fire again for 4 more years, you probably shouldn't be making long term plans that rely on your neighbour's house not being on fire, even if they manage to put out the fire again.

South London bus rides are often eventful but not usually because of the *drivers*. American public transport sounds insane

Every show is now like Rosemary & Thyme, about murder-solving gardeners, where people regularly stop in front of a lovely herbaceous border & explain who they are to each other. That was aimed at the very elderly but now we’re all like that

Such a good story.

Why would being a barrister & a crime writer make you good at identifying traitors anyway? It would make you good at inventing an imaginary traitor & arguing about it at best #TheTraitors

Off Season - 150 exhibitions all over Margate, in galleries, bars, shops & people’s front rooms, put together by artists on January 23-25. A good weekend to visit! (Don’t forget to walk up Northdown Road for my exhibition Bugs)

a sad update: I've received my maximum lifetime number of emails, and won't be replying to any anymore. I'm out of the email business.

I wonder what it’s doing to our imaginations that all this stuff can be outsourced to AI. Will people become unable to imagine things? Like pornography but for daydreaming - you lose the ability to do it yourself

I can’t imagine what it would do to you psychologically to realise your ‘mother’ is actually your dad’s AI girlfriend experience. I thought imaginary AI children might become quite common, but AI parents! holy shit

Baffling what the original intention was here. What could the prompt have been?? ‘Make it look like I’m having an affair with Jesus in a Premier Inn’?

This makes me laugh so much - impossible not to relate to the boy squirrel here