hey legend of zelda: a link between worlds dev team, why the fuck does moldorm do 4 fucking hearts of damage in hero mode

Beautifully written knit pattern about to have me astral projecting

dropping out and leaving university: 🤩😌🥳 Packing up dorm: 😟😡😫

I HATE NATURALLY WAKING UP AT 7, WHAT DO YOU MEAN IVE BEEN UP FOR 3 HOURS AND THERES STILL 2 TIL NOON

I know literacy been down for a while because I’m seeing the effects by how I can’t find a single good read on ao3 rn

lunch meat turkey my beloved

Vom scare, but did not vom 👍

they got a reproductive rights march around my dorm starting at 8pm on a Wednesday, crazy

I know how it looks but you have to trust me I just spilt water and I am NOT a peepee man

I fucking love plastic

I’d go crazy for the scooby snacks they served at public school after daycare. I’m yearning

nicotine is the devil, the devil from the bible

love apples

what if this is my last straw

baby’s first geek bar just went to 99% on juice it’s a sad day in this country

whoever ripped wicked ass at the Joost Klein show in LA this evening go to a doctor that shit was not natural and also fuck you for making me and my friend smell your funk ass dookie gas

Pitbull is a he/him lesbian and yall just ain’t woke enough to have that conversation yet

where did all the trans people go? Like I swear there were so many yesterday. It’s almost like they’ve all gone . . . i n v i s i b l e . . . *eerie theremin chiming*

ripping legendary ass the last two days. I fear a storm is brewing. if I get cramps I know an earthquake is coming, and there will be mudslides if that happens.

slept on pot stickers a little bit, the reunion is hitting hard

people think they do enough asking how you’re doing. how come no one asking how that dookie ph is, maybe I’m a little acidic today.

get you a personal earthquake

just saw a mf with medieval peasant face. like 1000% what a medieval peasant begging for meager scraps would look like. they would conspire with the local mischief maker to rob my traveling cart of its wears. king (very non-literal) had the pale face and beady eyes you’d see in a medieval major city

I think I have dementia

who do I gotta report these nuclear ass farts to. I’m just trying to stay above board.

apple watch just congratulated me on reaching my daily movement goal, I was eating. Didn’t know I was freaky like that

hell yeah! picked all the boogers out of my nose! breathing hella sticky!

I ripped ass and it smelled like that day in kindergarten just before secular easter when you dye hard boiled eggs and that room wreaks of eggs until the end of April

I eat poop and bear and whale head and that’s all I eat and I’m a strong healthy boy

I have an insane anxiety disorder, undiagnosed. I’m keeping that shit to myself. *penjamin whistles*

McDonald’s ranch is bad and I’m not afraid to share my truth

Do I go for a shower beer at 1 o’clock post meridiem on a tuesday? or like is that too alcoholic pilled?

didn’t have enough liquids and rediscovered the magic of soup dinner. pic unrelated.

just saw a mf call themselves a molotov mixologist, stealing that

eats cheese slice, next cheese slice is literally fucking mold, vomiting crying killing myself

this is widowy fweaking me fo weal

If I had sauerkraut on this sammy I’d be in fucking heaven right now

why no dick queefs? riddle me that mr president!

bad day at the casino (balatro rng been ass like 5 hands in a row)

me five minutes ago: straight up yearning me rn: hungry af and if I even imagine physical touch from another human I will vomit

hey team had a vegetable for the first time in a month, who would have thought this would do wonders for my mental and physical wellbeing

how it be

me when I’m Rihanna

nourishment to the mind, body, and soul. Bless up wing deezy. Homies gave me some extra ranch too, they don’t know it but they saved a life tonight. Happy Groundhog Day everyone!

Have you ever tried this one? but it’s me jerking off at 8:33 am in a variety of position and stroke speeds

fart

how mcdonalds gonna make an economy off being a big bitch and then give me a tiny burger, fry, drink, and 4 chicken nuggets. I’m a big bitch and I need big bitch deals

Ninja is haram