a pun walks into a bar and 10 peoples die! pun in ten dead

2 points for 2 transfer…yaayyy slaying it 😬😬 meanwhile flagged caicedo scored 5 points 😐

#uclfantasy team for #md2 i had planned for wildcard earlier but think i’m gonna wait till md5 now out: caicedo, raphinha in: trincao, salah 🧢 mbappe defence looks shaky but im depending on ball recovery, save points & attacking returns as i don’t see many cs this md anyway. good luck fam

did y’all know that dyslexia can cause vaccines in kids 😱

how much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

#MarescaOut 🖕

bru-NO penandes 😐

team set for #UCLFantasy good luck to all those who play don’t think i can stay awake anymore for team announcements 🥱

an update: i missed the actual deadline despite setting up a thousand alarms because i was at cinema and didn’t notice my phone vibrating 🫨

"I think empathy is a made-up, New Age term that — it does a lot of damage." Charlie Kirk, 2022. I'm going to honor him by not giving a shit. WOMP WOMP

your last saved pic is your moral philosophy. no it ain’t 😭😭

thank god for the international breaks i thought i missed the deadline 😵

2 CS on the bench but at least i’m getting van ven in for wan bissaca that’s why a good bench is important 😐

strategically kept van de can third on my bench 😐

no ones talking about it or maybe i just haven’t seen it yet but wtaf is #fpl app this time. looks like a bloody cheap user unfriendly site 😏

#fpl team for #gw1 bench boost active good luck fam

first #fpl draft (technically second after auto select) didn’t even want to play but can’t let that atrocious season be my last ever so let’s go 🤘

sore losers…hope he’s banned for life

RIP…one of my fave pool player 😔

a country built by immigrants has now problem with immigrants 🤷🏻‍♀️ make it make sense 🤦🏻‍♀️

woke up to see spurs has sacked their manager for ruining their trophy-less record spurs to ange:

riots because their team won…make it make sense fr

my last fantasy team. gl everyone 🤘 #UCLFantasy

first club in history to win all four European trophies: Chelsea 💙💙 #KTBFFH

my cap is on bench. that sums up my season well 😏

bro this place is deader than my grandma tbh

i’m sad that spurs won but i’m happy for ange also united didn’t win…so that’s a W in my book

you’re reborn as a cartoon character. who are you?

#fpl team for penultimate gw

23 points on bench…this fucking season seriously 😟

BEFORE ANYONE ELSE MESSAGES ME!!! I am aware of the picture of me in the shower that is going around posted as an act of revenge TBH I don't really care at the moment I like Me & I am not ashamed of Me I have even posted the picture here to save you all from having to search for it. Whatever!!!

may the peace prevail 🙏🙏

“have you ever heard the sound of cicadas?” she asked “yes, of course.” i replied “it’s the sound of their bodies heaving with desires.” she told me. then she gave a sheepish smile and continued, “do you hear mine?”

captained marmoush because i’m so hip…ain’t i 😒

chelsea in uefa conference league 🤣

so me and dcl were walking down the park and he stumbled on a tiny rock and injured his hamstring i said, “let’s take you to a doctor.” he asked, “which doctor?” i smiled back, “no, the regular kind…but maybe with the injuries you keep on getting that might be our resort tbh.”

trump won the election and liverpool won the league …and we are only 1/3 way in 2025 😱 i wudnt even say what i’m worried about next 🙈

#fpl fam how’s we feeling today

my #fpl free hit team for #gw34 all advices and suggestions welcome. i hope to finish in top 500k at least 😭😭

this is the worst bench boost in my memory 😭😭 #fpl

beginning of an end 🤔

mad(e) for each other 😇😇😂😂

happy easter folks fun fact: in olden days this was more popular christian holiday than christmas. so much so that jesus came back from dead to celebrate it 🤷🏻‍♀️

my captain in dgw replaced before 60 minutes mark 😑 #fpl

#fpl query: if i use FH, would my accumulated FTs get wiped out?

…and spurs

thank god for manchester united sincerely, a chelsea fan

ofc pedro scores a brace after i kick him out on wildcard 🤷🏻‍♀️

oh man…milan scored again…ciao bayern 👋👋

muller should be named mr bayern munich. what an unsung hero 👏👏