Reminder that all PAVARD rolling stock is available for download up to three days before your digital transit trip! Fares must be paid in advance, though discounts are given for paying farther in advance. If you pay more than a month in advance your trip is free!

What the fuck was with that Tepl University ad, I'm scared.

unoopes i cought th trane, it is back on the Wilmington-Newark Line, and on schedule!

oopes i dropt a trane

To celebrate the release of Deltarune Chapter 5 Tomorrow, PAVARD excited to launch Bus Route 309 from Telford to Hometown via Route 309 and Hometown, Pennsylvania. Fares are $2.90 per trip and you will be fairly compensated for missed work.

Listen, PAVARD WEST is not under my jurisdiction yet. And I'm still looking for those K-Cars, look for long octagonal vehicles that go along the route of the 76 that bear poorly painted over SEPTA liveries.

PAVARD WEST would like to announce the 76 Streetcar, that's right, there is now a Streetcar between Oregon City and Beaverton. No context has been given. Also we're now missing 15 K-Cars from the fleet we use for the T, We are unsure if these are connected.

A reminder to all passengers: PAVARD offers free wifi on all vehicles, but the password is scrambled every day at 11:32 AM Eastern. Special Vehicles will have unsecured wifi connections with the SSID "Are you sure you want to connect to this one?" Stay safe online riders!

All service from Washington Square Neighborhood to Washington Square Mall is cancelled until the WES stops being a fucking bitch. Or until tomorrow, whichever comes first

Celebrate Juneteenth with PAVARD! Take any route except the 24 into Center City for free wafers and scones. The 24 is not making stops between Welsh Road and Byberry Road because one very vocal rider is feeling spiteful.

PAVARD WEST has announced a supplemental Rail Service for the 62. Unfortunately it is single-track along vast stretches of Murray Boulevard and we here at PAVARD are trying to fix it. It's not working out well because our replacement tracks keep turning into PVC pipes.

PAVARD WEST has announced a new supplemental service to the WES, it will leave Beaverton at ??:30 and mysteriously appear at Washington Square Transit Center Uninvited at ??:52 before continuing to Tigard. Commuters are urged to pet the train before boarding for an Easier riding experience.

It has recently come to our attention that- ALL OUR TRAINS KEEP BLOWING UP! We would very much like it if they would stop, but the Silverliner IIs and IIIs are very temperamental beasts. Fortunately all rolling stock shared with SEPTA is intact.

We apologize for the brief communications overlap with KITTY CITY, it will happen again when you least expect it, and we are not actually sorry. Also, expect an increase of anthro cats on PAVARD services

Meow Meow meow Meowmeow PAVARD meowmeow mew Mriau!!

It's pride month! You know what that means!

We are of course, allowed to state the following: Cherries, trees, water, toe beans, Pokémon Go, Sonder.

Coming Soon: Restored service to Newtown! Get your SEPTA/PAVARD/PATCO keys ready! We are contractually obligated to not tell you where our infill stations and bus realignments are, because otherwise it would ruin the magic

It has come to our attention that we forgot to mention that we pay our digital workers fairly. All Digital Workers must be with a union to work for PAVARD. If you or a loved one is an AI and is seeking a job with PAVARD, get with the Artificial Workers Union to negotiate pay!

We apologize to anyone on the Appalachia-Iowa line between 2023 and 2026. The line got briefly taken over by computers when they thought the A-I Line was actually the AI line. PAVARD stands against Generative AI, and in fact uses digital people trapped in cyberspace for that job instead.

Good news. James Sinegal 2 has replaced the Walmart with a Costco, and integrated PAVARD service into it. Have your Costco member cards ready, and show your PAVARD Keys for discounts at this location! Also, all meals purchased at this location are exempt from the "No Food" Rule on PAVARD trains.

The train from Strafford to Stratford is cancelled indefinitely because Sam Walton put a Walmart in the way.

We are announcing a free Silverliner IV.2 Cab Ride to whoever documents the PAVARD Center City section the best. Good luck, and this is a monthly competition.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA Sorry, a mini-anvil got stuck on the 'A' Key, we're trying to figure out where it came from, but we keep being blocked by The Giant Wall of Existential Collapse.

To the friends and families of those displaced by the 30th Street Station Platform disappearances last month, we have good news and bad news. The good news is we found your loved ones. The bad news is they're all wearing each other's clothes.

PAVARD operations will instead bypass Delaware entirely and bring you to Washington DC. We're working with Amtrak to figure out why

PAVARD is also holding that kind of open house. Good luck finding us, we don't know where we are either

UPDATE: As part of an agreement with the DTA, We have opted to wrap trains with the trans flag to make them visible. Good luck still because now the interiors are invisible.

As it is Trains Day of Invisibility, all PAVARD trains are invisible until the doors open, good luck!

The scheduled 2:00 train from Exton to Inton is cancelled due to the Nonexistence of Inton, Alternative service is provided to Newtown.

The 3:40 train from Wilmington to Chestnut Hill East will not be passing through Center City, Suburban Station is currently open for disrepair.

The 2:40 Emergency Emergency train from Trenton to West Trenton has been redirected to East Trenton for "Evil" Reasons

The 1am Emergency Train from Trenton is delayed due to a cat on the Void Delaware River

UPDATE: Platform e has returned but the train is still cancelled because the track now faces the wrong direction.

The 6:00 to Nowheresville is cancelled on account of Platform e at Suburban Station ceasing to exist

In Accordance with SEPTA Policies, PAVARD has opened a Bluesky account