Just watched an elderly man with dementia wander up on stage at the UN and ramble on in gibberish

I guess thoughts and prayers

So I was wondering how it came to be that Melania is hosting this AI event at the WH. Turns out Sam Altman was trying to explain the various types of AI models to Trump, and Donald just heard “models” - so he decided that Melania had to host.

Glad to see Trump is taking the time away from his golf schedule to weigh in on really important shit like the Cracker Barrel logo

Taco didn’t really have to fly all the way to Alaska if he was just going to agree to every single thing Putin wants and get nothing substantial in return. He could have just sent an email.

The main question I have about this DC takeover by the national guard is where are the Epstein files?

Ron Desantis is basically the mayor from Jaws.

Are we sure all this focus on Epstein is the right play? Seems like we’ve tried this like 7 times already and Trump always ends up selling himself as some kind of persecuted warrior to his brainless base. Why not keep the focus on the bad policies that will hurt his base?

The Epstein files are in a state of quantum superposition. They exist and don’t exist at the same time.

So the timeline is this: 1- We will release the Epstein files 2- We are working on releasing the Epstein files, it’s a lot to go through 3- There are no Epstein files 4- Stop talking about the fucking Epstein files, they were written by Democrats Am I getting it right?

If this bill passes, Democrats need to make sure the stink of it sticks to every republican that voted for it.

Jobs,Jobs,Jobs!

Schumer announcing that he got the name changed on the “One Big Beautiful Bill” reminds me of those old Geico commercials- he should have just told us he saved a bunch of money on his car insurance.

Whoever made those clips of Trump’s deranged posts being read with Emperor Palpatine’s voice should keep on doing it

Folks, folks - we’re looking at this all wrong. I mean, YES we have a new war in the Middle East, and YES prices keep going up, and YES we are deporting the workers and not the criminals, and YES jobless rate is climbing… -BUT- We legit stopped a Trans girl from getting a fencing trophy

So much for Trump’s imaginary gas prices of $1.99 a gallon

Somewhere out there, a very confused Jose Padilla is wondering why JD Vance was expecting him to show up at a press conference and ask a question.

It’s officially summer and time to start planning for this year’s war on Christmas

Since Trump decided not to acknowledge Juneteenth, here ya go HAPPY JUNETEENTH, ESPECIALLY TO THE SICK AND VERY STUPID DEMOCRATS THAT SEEK TO ERASE OUR GREAT HERITAGE BY REMOVING CONFEDERATE MONUMENTS. WE WILL PUT THEM BACK EVEN GREATER THEN BEFORE!!! THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION TO THIS MATTER.

So let me get this straight - Trump will decide if things are so urgent and dangerous to our national interests so as to compel us to bomb another country…in two weeks?

Remember when politics was boring?

Yesterday, in an increasingly dangerous world, the commander in chief briefed this year’s graduating class of army officers on the risks involved in selecting a trophy wive

I thought it would only take the one phone call to end the war?

When South Africa sends it’s people, it’s not sending it’s best

Does anyone know where RFK Jr was?

I just learned that Pope Leo has an asshole MAGA brother in the family. He is so much more relatable now

So after a positive jobs report, this is now the Trump economy and not Biden’s? But, just this week on Wednesday it was Biden’s economy? Did I get that right?

Don’t like the news? It’s fake. Don’t like the polls? Rigged. Don’t like the election outcome? Also rigged. Don’t like the market reaction to your policies? Fed’s fault. Can’t end the war in Ukraine like you promised? Biden’s fault. When does Donald Trump take responsibility for anything?

Trump is having just as many phone calls with Xi as a nerdy 13 year-old boy has with his “girlfriend from Canada”

I was starting to feel impressed by the level of detail visible in a planetary landscape when viewed through the Webb telescope - but then I remembered I was just looking at a zoomed in photo of Kristi Noem

MAGA: “Tell me when the stock market ever jumped 3,000 points in just one single day with Sleepy Joe? You can’t. Trump’s a genius!”

I’ve always been morbidly curious about what would happen if my 78 year old, senile, Fox News-watching uncle were put in charge of the global economy

I have a 100% trade deficit with my dentist. I buy services from her but she buys nothing from me. Therefore, effective immediately, I will be tariffing my dentist at 50% of the value of her services. I will go ahead and charge myself an extra 50% at my next cleaning. Did I get it right?

I keep hearing from Trump supporters that he plays “3D Chess”. I am fairly sure he would lose at tic tac toe

When Trump is finally done with us “Hawk Tuah coin” will be worth more than the US dollar

Can’t remember the last time I saw CNBC break out the all-caps font on their website.

An old fat shit stain just single-handedly wrecked the economy and is now off to play golf

MAGA, as Dow drops 1,000 points: “but…but…but Hunter Biden’s laptop!”

On this Liberation Day, let us give thanks to President Trump for liberating your 401k from value

Trans Day of Visibility should be a day of joy, but it feels somber this year. The onslaught of attacks against trans folks seems endless, so I just want to say this: Trans people deserve respect, freedom, and autonomy. They deserve to live their lives as their true selves without fear.

Regarding Trump ending the war in Ukraine - this is the longest “single phone call in 24 hours” ever.

Trump announced 25% Tariffs on all Chinese malware imported to Pete Hegseth’s phone

I don’t think the Houthis showed enough gratitude to JD Vance for leaking our attack plans

Maybe a group chat on national security matters over an insecure platform is the one time it makes sense to NOT practice inclusion.

When exactly will this one phone call that Trump says will end the war in Ukraine take place? Wasn’t that supposed to have happened already?

“Those who would give up essential Liberty, to purchase a little temporary Safety, deserve neither Liberty nor Safety” - Benjamin Franklin